38 weeks pregnant!!

HOW I've been longing to update here! Finally I have a moment, but it's late and I will waste no time!

So I have reached TERM!! Wheee! As of last week I can have a homebirth any old time I feel like it! ;) It feels very surreal to be 38 weeks, more so than 37 weeks even. That's REALLY pregnant, isn't it?! And that's sooooo surreal. Surely not me, that pregnant already?! And it's really beginning to hit home that I'm about to have a baby girl. A baby GIRL! How will I ever wrap my head around that? I still can't grasp it, and feel giddy with excitement when I try. :)

I had a midwife appointment the day before yesterday for 38 weeks, and Mandi (my favourite midwife, who delivered Benjamin and Samuel) came. I have ended up requesting not to see one of the midwives on the team, which is reeeeeeally awkward and waaaaay out of my comfort zone, but I was strongly urged to by Heather (who has no such qualms or discomforts!) because this midwife isn't one I "gel" with at all. She seems unconfident about my choices and uses negative tones and it's frustrating, so yeah. I contacted Jackie who is the head of clinical midwifery at the hospital (my very important link - it's great knowing people in high places!) and who delivered Elijah and arranged for me to see NO consultants at all this pregnancy! :) It has been so lovely not to have that this time! Anyway, she was wonderful and has arranged for home-only appointments for me, and the midwife in question isn't seeing me any more, and nor will she attend my birth even if she's on duty. I feel better about that, but you still never know who you'll get... There could be worse midwives to attend me, so I'm just praying over it! Mandi is just back from maternity leave, and only works Mondays and Tuesdays, so I'm hoping things will be well-timed for her to be with me again.

Anyway, on Monday she did my blood pressure (120/84 - up a bit from my usual low norm, but still fine), and my urine (clear), and then went to feel my tummy. She immediately said, "Do you feel that the baby has grown much?" and I said I didn't know, because on thinking about it, I couldn't say that I had noticed much growth. She felt her position - head down, back on my right side and feet on my left (she's usually the other way: back on the left, feet on my right), head not engaged yet - and then measured my bump. She said that I was measuring 36 weeks, which is what I measured 2 weeks ago (at 36 weeks). She remeasured a few times, but got the same. And then she said that the first thing she had noticed was that the baby felt the same size as last time she came round. Because it was her doing the feeling and measuring both times, and because I have been measuring spot on or a week ahead throughout this pregnancy, she decided it would be best to send me for a quick scan to check that Lydia's growth rate is okay. I was happy enough with that, and amazingly, when she made the phone call from my house at 11.45am, she arranged a 1.30pm scan the same day! What a quick result! :) I made a couple of phone calls, and Neil came home from work to work from home the rest of the day, so he could be with the boys while I went for the scan. Heather dropped everything and came with me to the scan - she's "on call" for me officially now that I'm 38 weeks pregnant! :) That means there's nothing, day or night, that she won't drop to be with me if I need her for anything pregnancy or labour related. Very reassuring! :)

So I got to have another peek at my darling baby girl! :) So unexpectedly too! I didn't have time to get worried about her, though I was a little nervous that she'd have some bizarre placenta or cord problem that was slowing her down. I didn't get any pictures from the scan, and I didn't get to double (triple!) check that she's definitely a girl, either. But I caught a flash of her legs from underneath and didn't see anything sticking out, so that's something! ;) I did have a momentary paranoia that she'd have grown boy bits or something, hehe! I just don't think I can believe she's really a girl until she is in my arms and I get to take an actual LOOK and know for sure!

She looked very squashed and folded up in there, but I guess that's usual at 38 weeks! I forget already what Elijah was like in the two scans I had done at 37 and 39 weeks for his growth checks. Squished up, at the 39 week scan, if I remember rightly! We saw Lydia's heart beating merrily, and her little stomach, kidneys and bladder were round dark circles full of fluid, so she's been busy drinking her amniotic fluid! I know she's been practising breathing as well, because I've seen my tummy going softly up and down where her back is. Earlier it was very jerky and arrhythmic, but now it's smooth and rhythmic all the time, and at a slower rate like a newborn's breathing, which is pleasing to see! :)

Anyway, they measured her abdomen and I saw on the screen that the measurement was 38 weeks and 4 days, so I relaxed immediately! The lady said, "Normal tummy size!" Then they measured her femur which was... I can't remember exactly now - either 38.1 weeks, or 37.8 weeks something like that. Pretty much spot on to the day anyway. Neil's body shape, by the way - my leggies (and Arthur's, and Benjamin's) are short and the boys who have inherited them were always 2 full weeks behind in femur length, bless their hearts! ;) Their heads were bigger than dates (apparently this is my gene as well - Neil has a little head!). Her head measurements gave a date of 37.1 weeks - aww! :) Definitely Neil's daughter! ;)

They were obviously satisfied with her measurements, so they didn't go on to check placental function and umbilical cord blood flow like they did with Elijah (whose growth they were not happy with). They had me wait in the waiting room until they brought out the report for my notes. They came out and showed me the graphs with her measurements marked on them, SMACK on the average line, and they were really nice and reassuring. They estimated her weight that day to be 3071g, and since I have no idea what grams mean (!), I asked what that was in pounds and ounces. The lady seemed pretty confident that it was somewhere around 7 and a half pounds, and I was like, "WHAT?!?! She's still got 2 more weeks!!" lol! I did not expect her to be that heavy already, and for some reason I had really hoped she would be quite a little baby. I love having little babies! I have loved my big hefty babies too, of course, but there's something so gorgeous about a 6-or-7lb-something baby. All those teeny tiny clothes fit up to 7.5lbs, and I have some things that I'm desperately hoping she'll fit into at birth! Such a silly reason, but hey ho. I still hope! :) If she's as big as 8lbs she should still fit her tiny newborn clothes for the first few days maybe... Anyway, I knew she would be a good 8 and a half pounds if she was 7 and a half now.

Heather was tut-tutting about my minor freak-out, because she kept saying how inaccurate those estimations are, and also her focus was on the fact that it doesn't make any difference to BIRTH, big baby or little baby, despite what  people believe. It's true for me - my 9lbs 9oz and 8lbs 11oz babies were no harder to birth than 5lbs 13oz Nathey or 6lbs 8oz Elijah - I think Elijah was my easiest, but NOT because he was small. Because he was sixth, and I had a very smooth labour and was completely in control of my own second stage rather than having any sort of coaching or instructions. Not a piece of cake by any means, but easier!

Well, when I got home I looked up 3071g and was thrilled to discover that it equates to 6.77lbs!!! Yay! At first I didn't engage my brain and thought she was 6lbs 8oz, but of course it's 6-POINT-77lbs, so that is more like 6lbs 12 or 6lbs 13oz. Anyway, yay for still being under 7lbs! ;) Hopefully if she is born around her due date she will still be under 8lbs, but we'll see. And I mustn't forget that those scans can be out by half to a full pound in their estimation! At Elijah's 39 week scan he was estimated to be 6lbs 4oz and he was born 11 days later weighing 6lbs 8oz, so I think he must have weighed less than 6lbs 4oz at 39 weeks - they gain roughly half a pound per week at the end of pregnancy.

I am thrilled that Lydia is doing just fine in there! It was good to get that reassurance, whether or not my tummy measures up for the number of weeks pregnant I am. I know she's growing still, and measuring right on target for her gestation.

Mandi is coming back again for my next appointment, which is my - gulp! - DUE DATE appointment!! 40 weeks!!! Can't believe it's right around the corner!

We've done quite a lot to get ready since I last updated. We've put a ton of boxes in the loft to clear my room. That's all the baby boy clothes which have been piling up as Elijah has grown out of various sizes. There were still 0-3 month baby boy clothes in the baby clothes drawers!!! lol! I had given up with drawers months ago and we were pretty much just using the boxes as his clothes storage - *sigh* MUST get more organised and tidy this time around! They're not delapidated cardboard boxes, just to say! Clear plastic crates with flap lids on hinges - one box for each clothing size, which is helpful for me so that I don't allow the clothing to get out of hand!

I sorted through all the tiny baby, newborn, 0-3 month, 3-6 month, and 6-9 month baby boy clothes boxes to get out all the whites and neutral stuff for Lydia. I was surprised to find that sorting the tiny baby boy clothes made me feel kind of... a pang of sadness that for the first time, I am not using them. The very first time! After all these babies! I've never not used them before... It made me wonder if that's the end of using them - if there will be no more baby boys to use those clothes, and no more baby boys to grow into some of my favourite clothes that Elijah grows out of. I don't think I could ever feel like I have "enough" sons! I so love having little boys! To think of having another baby boy one day makes my heart sing! But how lovely it would be to have another baby girl so that Lydia has a sister one day! I just hope I have time for more babies yet, and that God will bless us again...

We still haven't moved Elijah to the boys' bedroom - he is still nursing on demand at night by my side! Eek! I'm slightly reassured by reading my blog and discovering that Samuel was still in my bed at this stage with Elijah's pregnancy too. Two things have delayed us - one is that we need to set up the toddler bed for Benjamin, and we discovered that we haven't got all the bolts and screws to put it together! I don't know where on earth they are - I have eventually found all the screws, and two of the bolts, but the bolts are essential and there are two more missing, so we can't set it up. We also had no mattress for it! I remembered after a while, that I think there was a yucky spill on the old toddler bed mattress when we last used it, and we tossed it, intending to replace it when we next needed the bed. Anyway, I ordered one and it's here now, so maybe we'll just have to put the mattress down where the bed is meant to go for a temporary measure? We'll try to source the bolts at B&Q this weekend but they might need ordering from the bed manufacturer. *sigh*

The other thing in the way was the 2nd cold in a month, which had poor Elijah so stuffed up and sad at night, and I don't want to move him when he's unwell. Samuel has had a horrible cough with it as well, and coughs a lot in the night for ages, which would undoubtedly wake Elijah up if he was newly in the room. Samuel is STILL coughing, but Elijah is almost better now, and I'm PRAYING (desperately!) that we don't catch anything else before Lydia is born. I feel so paranoid about it now, with the time of year, every time the boys go anywhere, urgh. People just don't take care to keep their kids home when they're infectious with stuff, so I know they're at risk - run of the mill for any child, but something that could be really really awful for us as a family just as we're about to have a new baby. :( Of course parents who don't take that care, don't actually think about things like that. It has always bugged me so much. Bleh. Today several of the boys played with toys in a waiting room, while the other several went out to a playground with Heather - both have me slightly hyperventilating in my hormonal paranoia, and praying hard that they haven't been exposed to ANYTHING. Tomorrow the boys are going out to a big event for children in London and I'm struggling to stay at peace about it. I absolutely want them to have the experience (Heather is taking them), and they are definitely GOING, but I know people are going to go with kids who are still infectious with various things, and it scares me. I don't want to be dealing with vomiting children for 2 straight weeks (yes, it takes that long with 6 young children!) up to and beyond my due date, or dealing with the same myself at this point in my pregnancy - and I would be heartbroken if I or my kiddies were infectious with anything viral when Lydia was born, so that I had to be paranoid about them being near her or even ME holding and snuggling my own precious baby - it would ruin her arrival, and I think that's a big enough deal for it to be reasonable to have frustrations and worries over infectious kids everywhere at this stage of my pregnancy! :/ I'm just hoping so so so much that the boys will stay well now.... Please pray for our health! We went to church last Sunday for the last time until after Lydia is born, for that very reason. It's just not worth the risk (both our colds have been from Sunday school groups that the boys go to), and we're off this Sunday to a miniature railway with my family - who we only see twice a year, and which is ANOTHER reason that I'll be gutted if we have to cancel because someone has taken their infectious child somewhere and infected my children! And then the following Sunday is almost on top of my due date, so we won't go anywhere that weekend.

So hopefully we'll be well this weekend and can move Elijah in with the boys. If we can't, then we're a bit scuppered, because I'll be 39 weeks pregnant!! Neil is home so late from work that it has to be a weekend to move Elijah, for both of us to be present with enough time at bedtime to do something that big a deal. I'd hate to move him out literally because his baby sister has taken his place in "his" bed! :( And I can't fathom co-sleeping with two littles. Elijah would be disturbed a lot (I keep the lamp on at night for the first few weeks to deal with the newborn explosive poo, and establishing breastfeeding), and he would be really cross not to have immediate milky and snuggles to get back to sleep every time, which I am sure I would not be able to do for him! Anyway, hopefully we'll be well, and the move will happen in the next 4 or 5 days and go well.

I MUST go to bed, but I still have so much that I wanted to write!!

I had an evening of painful tightenings and Braxton Hicks contractions with low backache at the weekend. I think I had done too much on Saturday - I was clearing space in the boys' bedroom for the toddler bed, and searching for the fittings for it. I took care not to do lifting and stuff, but maybe I overdid it anyway? I had constant discomfort from about 6.30pm and it was distracting enough so that I couldn't focus on anything else. I had tight BHs with it, but it was the constant pain in my lower bump and back that was the most bothersome. I was also pretty nauseous. I phoned Heather and she said it sounded a lot like pre-labour, but that it could also just be me "limbering up", which can obviously take weeks. I hadn't had a show or anything, so I just ate something in the end and felt a bit better. The next day I wasn't in pain or discomfort anymore, except that I'm fairly constantly uncomfortable in my bump, hips and lower back now. Sometimes it's properly painful, but not contractions or anything. Ligament pains that won't shift easily are bothering me a lot again, in the lower sides of my bump, both at night and in the day. Those are searing and impossible to move against, but they're really hard to get rid of! The back of my pelvis hurts a lot, especially when I lie on my back for even a short time, and I can hear and feel little bones grinding and clicking when I try to move from my back to my sides or to sit up. Yeurgh! Everything is loose in there (thanks, relaxin!), and ready to move about for my baby to be born, which is good news I guess! Just uncomfy right now.

Sunday I did more sorting and clearing, but tried to be careful again. I had similar discomfort in the evening but nowhere NEAR as bad as Saturday evening, and since then I have just had the occasional BH contraction - those are tight and very uncomfortable, and sometimes painful, but nothing regular or labour-ish at all yet.

I finally got Neil to take a belly pic this evening! Yay, finally a belly pic at 38 weeks - I think that's 10 weeks since my last one! :( Not including the family pic at 32 weeks which I posted last entry. I went to look at my belly gallery for Lydia's pregnancy and was dismayed to find that there were only two photos in it - 6 weeks and 12 weeks, I think! :( But when I went to photobucket to see what I had there, I was happy to find that I DID take two photos which I never got around to posting - 20 weeks, and 22 weeks. So I have now updated my belly gallery (that link takes you to a big page with ALL my belly galleries, except Arthur's, and Lydia's is at the top), with new photos for 20 weeks, 22 weeks, 28 weeks, 32 weeks, and tonight's 38-week belly picture. Now it looks much better and less sad and empty! Also, I notice that I look MUCH smaller than 38 weeks with ANY of my boys. At least I think so anyway. I didn't get as far as 38 weeks with Nathan, and I didn't get belly pictures beyond 36 weeks with Elijah either, but I still think I am looking more compact and small this time around than with the boys. Also I haven't gained nearly as much weight! It HAS to be a girly thing, because I've had six pregnancies before this and have gained a ton by this stage with all of them. Last time I weighed myself was at 34 weeks (I think??) or around that stage, and I had gained 28lbs. Normally I have gained about a lb per week until around the early 30s, and then I start gaining more than a lb per week (hence the 45-55lb weight gains each pregnancy!). So I knew I was already lighter at that stage than ever before, having gained only 28lbs so far. I know I will gain faster now, and I haven't weighed myself since, but I can tell from the photos that I am not as humongous in the thigh, face or upper arm departments (!) as with my boy pregnancies. I am stuffing myself with sugary treats just as always, so it can't be that! :p

I am utterly addicted to extra strong mints this pregnancy. I mean, I crunch my way through a pack or two every day. I know it's awful! I feel yucky for it sometimes. But it's a proper craving and I can't run out of them or else I'm literally wringing my hands until Neil gets home with more, lol! I have always liked mints in my 3rd trimesters, but nothing like this. The boys are quite amused every time they see me frantically pulling the mints out of the kitchen cupboard and crunching away, hehe!

So much more to say, but I'm tired out of my brains (feeling generally better, anaemia-wise, but still so tired these days) and must go to bed.

Oh, but all of Lydia's baby clothes are present and correct! :) I have been given, or bought on eBay (nothing brand new, budget won't allow for it, but I love browsing eBay anyway so it's okay!) EVERYTHING she needs in size "tiny baby - up to 7.5lbs", newborn (up to 10lbs), and 0-3 months! I have quite a bit of 3-6 month clothing and some bigger sizes too, but almost all hand-me-downs - I haven't really shopped for those sizes yet. I have now had the absolute pleasure of washing ALL the newborn clothing and folding it - here's a photo which I couldn't resist taking a couple of weekends ago when I did it all (I actually did squeal quite a bit, lol! The boys were all at the park so it was okay, hehe!):



This is most of her stuff, minus a few dresses which were not washed with the light/white loads - all size tiny baby or newborn. I had SO MUCH FUN washing and sorting! :) They are all tucked neatly into her drawers ready for her to wear, and I admit, I do open them and hug myself with glee from time to time, just seeing all the PINK in there! :) I don't care if I'm going to tire of pink eventually - right now I am absolutely LOVING it!!! :D

Tonight a Tesco order was delivered, which contained loads of cotton wool (newborn nappy changes), packs of maternity pads, and some breast pads, although I don't leak much now after the first few babies - Heather says this is more to do with my body being efficient at storing milk with the greater number of babies, than producing less (which I was concerned about at first). I'm glad anyway! I always used to leak like crazy and soak the bed at night, and breast pads never held all the milk I leaked out, etc. Now I just have a pack of slim breastpads handy so that I can pop one in if I'm going out somewhere and don't want to leave a random patch on my clothes when my milk lets down. It doesn't last more than 6 months-ish so I don't use them after that. Also a travel pack of toothbrush/toothpaste/floss, etc. to put in my hospital bag - which is almost completely packed and ready, by the way! :) Getting the Tesco order made it really hit home for some reason, that she's really coming, and SOON! The clothes did too, but something as random as a pack of maternity pads is really hitting home with me tonight - I'm going to have a baby really really soon! She's coming out! Soooon! I can't believe it!!! :D I'm so excited, and so terrified, haha! NOT feeling warm and fuzzy about impending labour and delivery yet, but hopefully my anxiety will die down as it gets nearer, not the other way around. I just hope she doesn't come any later than my due date... I want to be well in time for Heather (with her craft fair starting 6 days after my due date). I met the back up doula who is lovely, but I still want Heather with me!

A friend at our old church had her baby in the small hours of the morning today, and that was another reality check for me, as we've been exactly 2 weeks apart in our pregnancies this time around. That seems very close, and here she is having had her baby (and not before her due date either!) today! They didn't know what they were having, and this morning before I heard the news (I knew she was in labour last night) Neil and I suddenly got anxious that they'd have a baby girl and call her Lydia! ;) Neil started to say that we'd have to think of a different name because it was just "too close" otherwise. I checked on the smartphone while we were in the waiting room with the boys this morning (Matthew had a play assessment) and discovered that they had a baby boy, and named him Daniel! :) I wonder what their girl choice was, because funnily enough we had come to the point where if Lydia turned out to be a boy, our name of choice would have been Daniel. We both love the name now - maybe next baby?! ;)

Anyway, reality checks left, right, and centre. Really actually going to give birth to a baby soon, and then  - even more surreal - will actually (really!) have a newborn baby in my arms of my very own to snuggle and feed and love - and this time, to dress in pinks and florals and little ribbony things!!! Wheee! :) I'm so unable to believe it, and it's so exciting!

Okay, Elijah is waking! Back soon! :)

36 weeks, 3 days

Oh it's been tooooo long!!! I keep wanting and meaning to update, but there's so much to doooooo! I have no energy! It never gets done. I know I will regret the big gap when I look back on my blog entries for this pregnancy, but I just can't seem to get time or energy to do it. :( Usually I increase my posting frequency quite a bit in the final month (especially the final week or two) of pregnancy, as it's foremost on my mind and I just have this URGE to blog everything I'm thinking and feeling, so I should be posting more soon. Just a shame about the lack of posts (and belly pics, for that matter!).

I didn't take any belly pics since I last posted one, BUT we did have a family holiday week in the last week of August, and while we were out and about, two days running we had a complete stranger come up to us and ask if they could take our picture for us (we got a lot of stares, lol!). This was taken the day before I turned 32 weeks pregnant, and since I'm standing pretty much sideways on, I can get away with using it for a belly picture! ;) Look at my brood of little boys! :)

So that will do as my 32 week belly pic! :) At least there's something of a photo record between now and the last one (28 weeks?). I REALLY intend to take a photo for 36 weeks, but I've been saying that quite a lot for previous weeks and still never got around to it. :/

I haven't got time to really think about how the past month has been - I'm sure there's a lot to report, but I am doing this update in the only time I will have - instead of the evening (when I can think a bit more clearly), I'm trying to whiz off an update while the boys finish their chores before we start school this morning, which ISN'T working as Samuel is fighting with Nathan right now, and then turning to take out his bad mood on Elijah, Benjamin has just gone for a poo which I will need to wipe in a minute, Matthew is mixing experiments in the kitchen instead of sweeping the floor like he's supposed to, and I think Elijah has filled his nappy which I should change! Soooo, that's about it for my update.

I will bullet-point the most important stuff, just incase I don't get chance in the next few days:

* I've been breathlessly exhausted lately. I asked the midwife to test my iron levels at my 36 week appointment on Monday this week, and the results came back with low iron - not TERRIBLY low (10.9) but not ideal. My norm in pregnancy is 12. something, and I started out at 13.1 this pregnancy, so 10.9 is low for me, even with the normal haemodilution during pregnancy. I have GERD and am already constipated, thank you very much (!), so I do not want to take iron tablets. I am on Floradix and hoping it works along with trying to eat more iron-rich foods.

* Trying to get ready for Lydia! Still sooooo much to do!

* LOVING all the little pink and floral clothes around the house!

* The boys now know her name and love it - they refer to her by name constantly, and it's lovely to hear! They are all SO excited that she's coming soon!

* She's SUPER active! Head down at every appointment so far - very thankful! And back usually to my left side, feet pushing on the right. She's very easy to feel, and I could even grasp her little foot through my tummy the other day! :)

Battery about to die and I have to deal with poo, so I'll have to stop. Back soon!!

31 weeks!

TERRIBLY long gap there, sorry! I am too tired to do much justice to a proper entry tonight, and my legs are jumping all over the place (RLS) and very uncomfortable, but I must just say SOMETHING so that I have made a blog post at last!

I am behind with my belly pics! The weeks are going too fast and the last time I looked up, I was 28 weeks (seriously!). I set my camera to take a 28 week belly picture of me with the boys all around me, because I did that last time with Elijah's pregnancy and it turned out to be a sweet thing to do! :) So here is my 28 week belly picture - I will post Elijah's for comparison below it:

Here's my 28 week belly picture from Elijah's pregnancy - I was surprised to see how much less my bump stuck out last time, than this time! Mind you, Elijah WAS small for dates. And I'm carrying just as low as ever with this baby girl, so that's that old wives' tale out of the window then! ;)

I don't think I am any different at ALL in terms of the pregnancy, how I'm carrying, etc. Nothing much is different, it's just "pregnancy" as usual. I have craved (bizarrely) classical music this time - I wish I could describe that better, but it's just that. I HAVE to listen to it. Not always, but I get times where the urge is overpowering like a pregnancy food craving (which is a STRONG pull). Sweet foods also, are a big thing right now, but then I think that's pretty normal for me at this stage of pregnancy anyway.

I expected to maybe carry higher, or a different shape, or put weight on differently (so many people have been telling me these things over the years), but really none of the above has been true for me at all. I'm carrying low (super low, sometimes), round like a ball on my front, and with no particular difference in weight gain. At 27 weeks I weighed myself and I was 11st 2lbs I think (I can't remember the exact lbs now). I haven't worked it out, because I am fairly disinterested in weight gain during pregnancy (You're pregnant. You gain weight. You give birth. You lose weight. Time scale matters not. End of!) and can't remember my starting weight exactly (9st 5lbs? 9st 7lbs? Not sure). In previous pregnancies at this stage of my 3rd trimester, I have usually gained a lb per week of pregnancy, so if my lower estimate was correct for my starting weight, then I had gained 25lbs at 27 weeks (or 23lbs if not), which is a little less than usual maybe? But I always end up gaining more than a lb per week from around the middle of my 3rd trimester onwards - sometimes several! :S

Anyway, it's all the same really, and that's quite nice! I have spent all these years and pregnancies slightly apprehensive about "what might happen" to my body should I ever be carrying a baby girl! ;) It's, well, just.... a baby really, as far as my body is concerned! ;)

In the last week or so, I have started to really feel more big and pregnant than before. I feel uncomfy quite a bit of the time now, but still able to enjoy being pregnant! I love it! :) I have restless legs like crazy at night which disturb my sleep quite a bit. Not as bad as last time yet, but bad enough. I have tried the liquid magnesium (run out now) and didn't notice any difference, unfortunately. I haven't had much trouble with leg/foot cramps for a while, so I will try going back on the magnesium if that starts up again.

I feel very big around the tummy! ;) I can't bend down to get things while sitting, or I get a horrible sharp piercing pain under my bump at the very front. I am having a LOT of trouble with ligament pains this pregnancy - sharp searing pain in the sides/underside of my bump, which is normal in pregnancy. I think I noticed more of that last time too. I wonder if that comes with the territory having had this many babies? I have ligament pains every pregnancy, sometimes quite a bit, but the first 5 had nothing on the 6th and 7th. It wakes me at night sometimes, and is so searing that I'm not sure what to do with myself. I am usually doing something really contorted or awkward like, ohhh, lying on my back! ;) Or my side. Something innocent and un-stressful for my ligaments like that - it's very perplexing! Changing position used to fix it pretty quick in my earlier pregnancies, but it's not doing much this time. It's as though just carrying a baby in there is stressing my ligaments out constantly. I am not sure if it has to do with her position, but I can't tell if there's a correlation.

I had my 28 week midwife appointment, and that went well. My urine was clear of any troubles, and I had my blood taken for antibodies (routine) and iron levels. They said they'd call me if my iron was low, and I haven't heard from them so I assume it's fine - it always always is during my pregnancies, so it's not a surprise to me. I went through a tired patch a while back and was pale, so Heather suspected low iron and had me take Floradix liquid iron for a while. I never finished it - I was just so sure it was a pregnancy/growth-spurt thing, and that my iron was fine, so I stopped taking it eventually. And sure enough, it seems to be fine! :)

Lydia was head down at my 28 week appointment but very high up, curled in a ball - nowhere near engaging her head in my pelvis, which is to be expected. She has plenty of room to turn about all over the place since she's my 7th baby! She is SO active!! I got worried a couple of weeks ago that there was something wrong because she seemed TOO active one evening! Evenings were her busiest time and one evening she just started kicking about like crazy. I mean, you're supposed to have 10 kicks every hour, and she was kicking more than 10 times in every MINUTE, for over an hour and a half straight!! I got concerned after half an hour and got my doppler out. My catastrophic imagination was picturing her entangled in her cord and frantically struggling to get free before she ran out of oxygen, or something like that. *sigh*

Her heartrate was around 130 (just as it was at my 28 week appointment), and it went up into the 150s range when she was particularly excited, but otherwise stayed pretty steady. No big dips. I listened in for about 20 minutes straight, and even found her umbilical cord pulse, which was pipping away nice and strongly. That reassured me somewhat that she was getting good blood flow and that (hopefully) her cord didn't have a bloomin' great knot in it or something like that (slightly more paranoid now, after Elijah was born with a true knot in his cord!). She kept it up for a long time and then went quieter for only about 20 minutes before starting with the frantic exercises again. My uterus got tired of it after a while and felt sore and crampy, and I had a lot of sore Braxton Hicks contractions! But I went to bed and she seemed more calm the next day - busy again in the evening though. Lately she isn't quite so predictable in the evenings. She is still awake and kicky and busy, but not always for very long. She is very active at various times throughout the day, evening, and night, at the moment. She kicks and pummels, and doesn't do many slow movements that I've noticed, like a long lazy stretch of her leg across me (some of my boys did that!), or slow squirms. On the other hand, she isn't at Matthew's level of strength and vigor in there either! Not many babies are, mind you! ;)

Lately I am feeling tired and breathless and pregnant. Normal 3rd trimester-ness, but it has really just started in the past week or so. I just feel under a lot of demand, physically, that's all. Not tired as in sleep-deprived, although I am that too, but just tired with the effort of growing and carrying a baby. She seems big to me, but I'm hoping I'm wrong! ;) My bump measured 29 weeks at my 28 week appointment, and she kicked about against the midwife trying to feel her position a lot! She also kicked (hard) the doppler directly at various times when I was listening to her, like she didn't want it poking her space! She is easily woken up by Elijah banging my tummy with his little hands or headbutting (he does this a LOT - like Arthur and Matthew did as babies/toddlers). I correct him all the time for it, and he has also learnt the word "gentle", and he strokes or "apologises" when he has whacked my tummy (or anywhere else on me) and I've said, "Ow! That hurts Mummy!" I have been working with him on it for a few months, because I could see the kind of baby he is (bit of a hitter) and wanted him to be clear on "gentle" and making someone better after hurting them, for when Lydia arrives. He isn't aggressive/mean, he is probably on the autistic spectrum like the other brother(s) who acted that way at that age. It's sensory in nature, for Elijah, not aggressive. I understand him. :) Anyway, he wakes her up a lot when he does that, as does Samuel or Benjamin doing loooouuuud tantrummy screaming right next to me on occasion. Hopefully she's being conditioned now to the kind of world she'll be born into, haha! ;)

We still haven't told the boys her name, but they are BEGGING to know, and we've told them that we'll let them know in September at some point, so that's quite close now. My scan dating says that my due date is October 20th (my dates by my chart say the 22nd, which I'm personally sticking with), and it's the 20th today, so that's exactly TWO MONTHS to go until my due date!!! Only 2 months!!!! That's sooooooooooo soon!! I'm exactly 31 weeks pregnant today, so only 9 weeks to go! I can't believe how fast it is going, and how close I am getting to holding my very own actual baby daughter in my arms for the first time (ever!)!! I'm so excited! To see her, and find out what she looks like - who she looks like. To put her in girly clothes - I just have that tight-throat feeling of squashing a squeal EVERY SINGLE TIME I think of that, even though that seems a really trivial or "shallow" thing to consider!

Elijah is starting to need his first haircut pretty soon, and the boys were talking about it today. Nathan said that the new baby would probably need her hair cutting when she got to be Elijah's age, and I said noooooooo, I would not cut it! I would let it grow and grow and grow, and only tidy the ends occasionally! :) They were all open-mouthed asking me WHY, lol! So I explained that I wanted my little girl to have long hair because I liked long hair on little girls. They paused to consider that, and then Arthur agreed, "Yes, I do too!" :) I hadn't thought about that before. We found the photo of Nathan from when he was about 15 months old, right before his first haircut, where I had used pink floral hairbands to put his hair into bunches - ohh he DID look sweet, hehe! But I knew it was a quick silly "thing" to do before cutting his hair. Suddenly today I realised I would be able to do that EVERY DAY with Lydia's hair and it would not be silly in the least if I did!!! Joy!! :)

I haven't started to even think about a "to do" list to get ready for her arrival yet! Normally I have by now, I think? I have so much else going on that it hasn't occurred to me, plus I have really genuinely been taken by surprise at the speed of the last few weeks passing by. I am currently in the midst of a new discipline/reward system for the boys, to get a handle on the trickiest part of my days (their behaviour and general stuff like that), and this week we began a new chores system for the first time, to help me as I get more pregnant, and in the postnatal period, and also to enable me in any case to have time to manage (read: not burn out, which would be the alternative, I assure you!), homeschool, and meet their needs, etc. Next week, Neil is off work and we are doing a "staycation", going on day trips but returning home at the end of each day. So that takes planning too. The week after is our first week back in formal schooling for the best part of a year. We've been unschooling all this time, and I am keen to start back with some formal lessons in the basics at least, and continue the "free-range" learning the rest of the time. More planning (lots and lots!) needed for a new year of homeschooling! Then suddenly I have 6 or 7 weeks to go, and yet I've only just started school with the boys for the year, so that will take my full focus for a few weeks as we get into a rhythm. I hope we'll get going well and manage to keep going up until the very end of my pregnancy, so that it's not too stop-start-y for the boys when we stop to have a baby for a bit. We'll probably stop until pretty much the end of the year - at least, I'm not expecting anything of myself until the New Year, but if Lydia is colic-free (!) and an "easy" baby like Samuel was, I can see us starting back in early December if not before, especially if we were off to a good start in the autumn. We shall see. Colicky baby girl? No plans for school until Next Year (ie. off my radar for a while!)! Love the flexibility homeschooling allows us! :)

I am getting rather excited about giving birth, although I'm sure the natural anxieties will return nearer the time when it feels more real! Last time felt like a GOOD birth experience for me (yay, at last!), not scary or unmanageable, and so for the first time I am looking forward to the next one! I know they're all different, but I'm hoping hoping hoping that the trend will continue. So far my labours are getting shorter - the last one was about 4 or 5 hours from 1st contraction to birth - and I am able to manage so much better because I feel very used to the sensations and remember, even in the moment, how I coped with that kind of pain last time, etc. Heather makes a big difference on the few occasions when I "lose it" and start freaking out or panicking - she brings me gently back to earth very quickly, and reminds me to go with my body, which I did 100% last time (again, for the first time), and which might well have been the reason I didn't tear (again, first time!) enough to require stitches. My recovery in the hours after Elijah's birth was SO much different to all the previous times, and I think it had to have something to do with the no tearing/stitches thing. Anyway, I hope Lydia's birth will be quick and straightforward and uncomplicated. And no stitches would be a marvellous bonus too! ;)

Okay, glad to have managed a decent update, but soooooo tired now - must go to bed. As always, I know there's plenty of stuff that I will have missed, but never mind. I'll really try not to leave it so many weeks this time! I want a belly picture for 32 weeks for sure, so I'll hopefully update with that. My next midwife appointment isn't until 34 weeks. I asked them to visit me at home for that, which they've agreed to do, and that makes it much easier! :) I'll update when I can! Thanks for hanging in there with this blog if you're still there! ;)

26 weeks, 2 days!

26 weeks pregnant already! Only 5 days to go until I start my 3rd and final trimester! I can barely catch my breath over how fast this pregnancy is whizzing by, and I am so rushed in mind and body all the time that I am sadly not getting much chance to stop and THINK about it each week and savour the pregnant weeks passing by. When I wrote the title of this post, I actually wasn't sure if I was still 26 weeks or if the past couple of days had been another week (they've been reeeeeally long days and busy ones too), so maybe I had forgotten that I'd turned 27 weeks already?! But no - definitely 26 weeks still! ;) That's the first time I've ever not been 100% tuned in to my pregnancy, week-by-week, though, which makes me feel a bit sad. I wish I could slow time down a bit and just... be able to stop my head whirling enough to take note of where I am and what's going on. Life is busier and more hectic than ever right now. Neil's old "work car" that used to be our family car back when we had just Arthur and Matthew (!) finally bit the dust and we can't afford to replace it, so he is getting to work via public transport. This instantly turns his commute into 2 hours on the way to work, and at least 2 hours (sometimes 3, ugh!) on the way home, which in turn makes my day actually painfully long. Don't get me wrong, I still LOVE my job, and wouldn't have it any other way! But 13 hours alone raising 6 small children and incubating another is really really really hard work. I'm also supposed to be homeschooling and coping with very impossible autistic and crazy ADHD type behaviour, but I am currently doing a really bad job at those two things along with the rest of it. Some of the boys are not awake when Neil leaves for work (but enough of them always are, that I have to be up early too), and then I can't (actually can't) do bedtime on my own so they are tired and cranky and hyper and late for bed every evening, because of waiting for Neil to get home. They should be sleeping by the time he gets home, but I can't get Elijah to sleep at the moment (Neil walks with him and he is out like a light in minutes, but he won't breastfeed to sleep right now), and the other boys' bedtime on a good night takes 60-90 minutes all told. If Elijah is awake during any of that time, he is SCREAMING, and I do mean that literally! Sometimes I've tried to do it, but it has been so awful, and 2 hours of working at it still ended up with Neil finally arriving home (like the night the buses were dreadful and he took over 3 hours getting home) and the kids are still up, and Elijah has been so distraught that he's still sleep-sobbing an HOUR after going to sleep in Neil's arms (which of course only took seconds).

Anyway, it's too much, and I can't manage it, but hopefully it's temporary. I don't know why it would be (house move? somehow another car?) but that's what I'm clinging to in order to stay vaguely sane. I am doing the best I can, and some days are better than others, but it's just too much to manage day after day. I don't know how single mothers manage, but on the other hand, I might not be a single mother in general, but there is something to be said for the sheer number of children I have, at the ages they are, with the specific issues some of them have...

I am not sleeping well. My RLS (restless leg syndrome) is at its worst again - I have it always, pregnant or not, but it's particularly bad during the latter part of pregnancy for me. This time I am taking liquid magnesium but it's not apparently making any difference. Or to the cramps in the sides of my lower legs, above the ankle. I am waking with those a lot at night, and I always need a wee in the night now too. I have trouble getting to sleep for an hour or so most nights, and once I wake for any reason, the RLS kicks in ('scuse the pun!) instantly. I also have the worst hayfever I've ever had, this year, since March. Thankfully it doesn't wake me, but it starts within about 2 minutes of being awake, with a vengeance, sneezing and itching and prickling and streaming. Unless I fall asleep pinching my nose HARD, I can't get back to sleep because of it! I have learned to prop my hand against the pillow in a certain way so I can maintain a hard pinch with finger and thumb on my nose, lol! It sounds crazy but it's the only thing that lets the itching and sneezing ease off enough for me to drop off again after a while. Elijah has been sleeping very badly this past week, I'm not sure why. I've learned that his sleep cycle is currently 50 minutes long, almost to the exact minute (I check the clock). Some nights he has woken every single 50 minutes, all night long, and needed resettling each time, or feeding. Most nights, though, he's done a few night wakings (which he always has done) and had a breastfeed to settle him back off, but woken between 2.30 and 3.15 somewhere, and then fussed and sat up and screeched and so on for 90 minutes or so before finally going back to sleep. I can't even describe in words how exhausted I am right now. And yet it's late, and here I am updating my blog. I am tired of never getting life "recorded" for prosperity here, to look back on. And I only got chance to eat dinner somewhere after 10pm tonight (that's happening too often lately as well), so I needed to stay up to digest for a while before going to bed anyway. I am having a lot more trouble with reflux this week - maybe the late dinners or stress are connected? So anyway, I try to stay up a bit longer to combat that. Vicious cycle? Hmmm.

Tomorrow Neil has to be out the door at 6.50am and he has a work function straight after work, so he won't be home until after midnight. Being Friday, I am already toast for the week, so I am DREADING it. Especially the impossible bedtime. And just surviving. Never mind the heatwave added to the mix - I'm actually tolerating the heat uncharacteristically well! :) Maybe I'm just too pressed in too many other areas to be able to give it enough focus?! I cannot WAIT for Saturday, because then Friday will be done.

What a negative post so far. I didn't mean to moan, just to honestly describe life at the moment. That's just a basic summary really.

Pregnancy-wise, Lydia is kicking around a lot, and her kicks are getting bigger and bigger all the time! I just cannot WAIT to meet her and hold her in my arms! I am so relieved to be into the "viable" stage, but I am still nervous when I do too much and have a ton of Braxton Hicks that hurt a bit, or lose what looks for all the world like mucus plug (have had a lot of that in the past couple of weeks, and almost asked Heather about the mucus plug at one point, but decided she would just tell me to go and get checked out by the midwife and I didn't have time or energy to do that, so I didn't mention it in the end!). 26 weeks is great, but still way too early for my baby girl to be arriving! I need her NOT to come too long after my actual due date (although I know for me, it's a possibility that she will anyway), because Heather's commitments mean that she is unavailable to me in any way, shape, or form, from when I am 40 weeks and 6 days onwards. :( Please please please be a due date baby, little one! The stress will be much greater as the time approaches this time around, because of Heather's plans.

My bump is growing fast, and the boys are loving it! I am getting crazy comments like, "Are there triplets in there?!" and round wide eyes when I answer that I'm due in October, etc. Apparently I'm big, but I don't actually think I am, certainly not for me anyway. I MUST take another belly pic - I've missed 24 weeks which I'm annoyed about, and STILL haven't taken one at 26 weeks! I don't seem to see Neil much at the moment, and when he's home (like right now), he is working on his work laptop (like he is right now) because he has a lot on at work. So he isn't taking my picture, and I don't have time to set the camera up and take one myself. :(

Last week (25 weeks) I weighed myself randomly, and I was 10 stone and 9lbs. That's really just a note for myself, so I don't forget, because I have no idea how that relates in any way, lol! I can't remember my starting weight, nor do I have time to look it up or figure out how many lbs I've gained so far. But here, at least I've made note of my weight, so that in 20 years when life has slowed down, I can sit down and work it out! ;) It's just for stats anyway, I do not care how much I gain. I am pregnant, I gain weight. End of. How much is just like how long a piece of string is. The string all gets cut to the same length after a certain amount of months anyway, so it doesn't matter how long it gets to.

Okay, I'm sure there's TONS more to say, but my brain is fried and I have to get some sleep. Sorry it's not the "best" of entries. I am happy!!! I love being pregnant and the joys that come with the demands of parenting lots of little ones with their own unique challenges! It's hard, but I'm blessed, and I know it. That's all it boils down to really, even when I complain - which I hope I don't do too often! :) Hopefully I'll do a more normal update soon.

22 weeks - belly pics, baby clothes, and other things!

Too exhausted to post tonight, but if I don't get these photos on here then I may NEVER get around to it! I got a 20 week photo (albeit the day before I turned 21 week!) and then another tonight at 22w4d. I look surprisingly similar-sized in them both, although I had a loose top on in the first one and then a snug wrap-type top on in the second. My bump has grown a LOT in the past week or so, I mean really really a lot, so I'm baffled as to why it doesn't really show in the photos!

I'll put them in the belly gallery eventually, but for now here they are - the first one is 20w6d:



And this next one is 22w4d. I look more tired in this one, but nowhere near as tired as I actually feel!



People are just now seeing me as obviously pregnant at church - just today I had many people congratulating me for the first time, saying they'd wondered for a while but didn't want to ask in case I just hadn't "gone down" after the last one yet! ;) Now they are SURE, hehe! I wore what I'm wearing in the 22 week photo to church this morning so I guess it was a fairly obvious outfit! ;)

So exhausted though. I don't feel too well with it. Heather told me at church this morning that I look pale enough to concern her, and she knows I am not sleeping great at the moment but she would like me to get my haemoglobin levels checked. I am inwardly sighing at that idea, because of the faff of arranging and attending a midwife appointment (I don't have one now until 28 weeks otherwise), and I'm reluctant to bother anyway because I've NEVER been anywhere near low with my haemoglobin during any of my pregnancies, but I've been this tired here and there during all of my pregnancies, especially the last few, I think. I don't think it's a getting older thing, I think it's just the sheer demand on me physically as I have more children. I am breastfeeding two (very little milk left though), and a third (Benjamin) is still having the odd breastfeed at bedtime several nights a week, and very occasionally in the day if he asks and it's convenient for me at that time. Elijah wakes several times at night and breastfeeds. Lately I have much worse Restless Leg Syndrome (typical for me during pregnancy, though I can get it badly when not pregnant if I'm tired enough), and it affects my arms too and sometimes my torso when it's really bad. This makes it almost impossible to bear lying still enough to breastfeed during the night, and Elijah gets cross and screechy if he can't nurse to sleep. *sigh* So night wakings are more prolonged and demanding than they used to be. He's settling sometimes now with me rubbing his back for a few minutes. But it can be 30 or more minutes up with him in the night per waking, sometimes. Yawwwwn. I have no plans to night wean, though I probably should start thinking about what I plan to do about it soon.

Anyway, in the absence of a midwife appointment/haemoglobin check (which I feel sure is fine anyway), Heather has insisted I go out and buy some Floradix liquid iron to take, and I've done that today, along with some liquid magnesium of the same brand. As well as the Restless Leg Syndrome, I am having increasing bother from cramps in the muscles on the sides of my lower legs - not the big calf muscle that's more typical. A couple of nights ago I woke up at 4.30am with one of them in hard cramp and I couldn't release it no matter what I did! I tried stretching it, walking, massaging. Elijah was asleep next to me, but I knew he would probably wake up pretty soon if I kept fidgetting about and then I knew the pain of the cramp would prevent me being able to lie still and breastfeed him until he was asleep again, so I got up and tried to walk some more. I was just debating waking Neil and asking him to keep an eye on Elijah (as he was stirring) so I could try - I don't know what! - hot compress? Painkillers?! I had no idea how to release the cramp! If I didn't physically pull my foot straight, the whole thing twisted by itself at the ankle until it was bent inwards and under, and I couldn't override it with just my muscles, I had to physically force it in place with my hands and hold it there! While I was standing in the dark on the landing wondering what to do, I noticed it easing a little bit, and so I stayed where I was until it was eased enough to head back to bed. It hurt like I'd strained the muscle the next day and it's a bit sore today, but I was careful to try not to move that particular leg muscle at ALL last night when I woke at 4am (for a wee - needing a wee once each night this week, which is new this pregnancy). It felt "dodgy", like it would have like to cramp up but thankfully it didn't. So hopefully magnesium will help with both the RLS and the cramps.

Little baby-lady-girl is growing well! She has grown SO much, I can feel the difference in the last two weeks. Her kicks went to "pretty big" last week and I thought that was a big jump in growth, but just yesterday and today I suddenly have kicks above my tummy button from feet which feel like proper 3rd trimester paddles, lol! I also felt her doing all sorts of fiddly plucky things with what felt very clearly like fingers, low down, this afternoon. She was head down at the scan, and I think she still is, although at this early stage that could change several times a day even!

I LOVE using the word "she"!! It is really settling in now that I'm having a baby girl, and I can't describe how joyful the past two weeks have been since we found out! :) I have bought a number of baby clothes on eBay and they've been arriving thick and fast in the post since then - such a wonderful fun time! :) The boys are excited, especially Arthur, seeing her clothes arrive. When the first ones came, they went a bit quiet and Arthur said it felt a bit strange seeing such different clothes, because it reminded him that it would be something different this time, and he doesn't do well with unknowns (Asperger's) so he was a bit unsettled by it at first. I reminded him that she would look like the boys, because she has come from the same Mummy and Daddy, and he brightened right up about it when I told him happily how I saw her nose and lips at the scan and they looked so very much like Matthew's had at his scan! :)

They are DESPERATE to know her name! We told them we are not going to tell them her name until much later in the pregnancy, because it's Mummy and Daddy's secret right now. They know the name will be for family and close friends ONLY, and that we are worried the littler boys will tell people accidentally if they know, so we will tell them "when it's time", later, but definitely before she is born. Arthur keeps asking questions all the same - he is never one to drop a subject, lol! He asked if it's a Bible name, and I said yes. He asked if it was Mary, and I said no, it's not found very often in the Bible. He asked if it was an Old Testament name or a New Testament one, and I told him New Testament, but THAT'S IT - no more clues! He will figure it out otherwise (he may anyway!) and I am not going to tell him if he guesses right, not at the moment anyway.

I am getting used to thinking of Lydia by name. I have her little clothes piled on the stairs where they are placed out of the way when they arrive and have been looked at and stroked, etc. I have my favourites of them all upstairs in the box of Elijah's clothes (he's STILL in 6-9 month clothing!) next to my bed. There's a sleepsuit that I got which I am in LOVE with. I should take a photo of it and post it. As soon as I unwrapped it and saw it, I knew it was the first thing I wanted Lydia to be dressed in after she's born. KNEW it. It is size newborn (7.5lbs, I think, which she should still fit into if she's a pound heavier if memory serves, as a brand new little person!) with slightly frilled cuffs on the sleeves, white with pink trim, and little pink roses printed all over it. It's still just a sleepsuit, but I'm in love. Every time I wake up and get out of bed I see it, and every time I take Elijah up for a nap or get him when he wakes, and when I go to bed. It makes me smile and feel warm inside every time, and I always stop to touch it for a moment. I say her name inside my head when I see it, and my whole heart fills with longing for the day when she's HERE and I put her in it (or someone does for me), and I hold her (I typed "him", haha! Force of habit!) - MY DAUGHTER! - and look at her in my arms, being all real and mine and clothed in this beautiful girly little sleepsuit. Sometimes I have a moment where fear clutches at my throat as I think of mothers who are filled with pain looking at a sleepsuit like I am doing, with a more raw and unbearable longing in their hearts for the baby that should be inside it, because their little one never made it to that point. I don't know what I'd do if that happened to Lydia - to me. Just for a second, I look at it and imagine looking at it with that longing. It's crazy to let my mind go there, but somehow it's hard to stop it - I don't let it linger, and I pray and try to focus on something else. I have these flashes of anxiety about ALL of my unborn babies - it's not just because she's a girl.

Anyway, her sweet first outfit is ready! :) And I'm having such a glorious time choosing and purchasing and stroking my little girl's teeny weeny little DRESSES, and floral patterns, and little frills on things, and sweet shades of pink against whites or denims. And baby tights that match a pattern on a top/dress set!!!! Even the boys went, "Aaawwwwww!!" when I pulled that one out of the package one morning when the postman came! :) Whenever packages arrive they all stop playing and crowd round, shouting, "Baby girl clothes! Baby girl clothes!" How I love my boys! :)

When the first eBay package came, I took photos of the items in it, as I had promised a friend on Facebook that I would! So I have those to post here, for sweet memory's sake! It was a precious moment for me to receive my first "pink" package in the post, and a permanent memory treasure, so I'm glad to record it here with photos! :) They are all sized "newborn" and very soft and lovely! The dress is soft brownish cord with pink sequins on the embroidery, and buttons on the back in the shape of hearts and flowers! :)

Arthur constantly refers to Lydia as "my little sister", almost as though he's longing to use the term as often as possible while he doesn't have an actual name he can use. Part of me really wants to tell him her name! He finds an item of her clothing lying around and grabs it up, calling to me, "What shall I do with my little sister's top?" He says he doesn't think he can bear waiting until she's here!

One day last week, an eBay package arrived with a couple of outfits in size 3-6 months. One of them looked overly generous in size, though it was definitely 3-6 months (Marks and Spencer brand), and when I took it out and held it up, Arthur said, "That would fit Elijah!" I held it up against him (he was toddling along some furniture in the living room) and realised it would be a perfect fit!!! Arthur BEGGED me to put it on Elijah, "just to see", and so I did! I took photos. Arthur was fussing over him like crazy after I took them. Elijah kept wanting to do normal stuff and walk about and play, etc. and Arthur wouldn't stop following him and picking him up. He kept holding him in his arms, bouncing him a bit, saying how sweet he looked! I noticed he seemed to be holding him more tenderly and gently than usual, and he told me it was because Elijah seemed "different" with the baby girl clothes on. I asked in what way, and he said, "Just softer and sweeter... like he's a baby girl... I just can't wait until our baby girl is here!!!" Bless his heart! I don't know where he got the stereotypes from there, but they're straight from his heart/head, not influenced - I don't know how he could have influence in terms of gender-related things. There's only one gender of children here, they're homeschooled and watch no TV! They have watched TV in the past though, including advertisements. *sigh* Hate those things! Anyway, here are the photos of sweet lil 'Lijah in his baby sister's clothes - he looks so pretty and sweet, hehe!

I hadn't noticed until Ella mentioned it that he is being all dainty with his little pointy toe in the first photo, hehe! He wore the outfit for an hour or two, and then I thought I ought to probably change him out of it, since it was too warm for the weather and he'd dribbled on it pretty well in that time! ;) Here he is all "boy" again an hour later:

Sweet tiny manny! He's so tiny for his age!! I bought him his first shoes (at last, after a massive search!) this week - he fits size 2F (!!!) but I bought him size 2.5F as well because he's sure to be in those soon. So weeeeeeeeny!!

Anyway, it's late and I'm tired, and I'm sure I have a lot else to report on my pregnancy over the past week or two, but I can't think any more and I just need to get some sleep. I'm glad to have updated with the photos and the belly pics, and with how it feels to be having a baby GIRL (GIRL GIRL GIIIIIRRRRLLLL!!! Can't stop saying it like that still!) in the couple of weeks since we found out!

I will try to update again soon!

Scan update - IT'S A.....

The scan was really straightforward, total answer to prayer. There was a 15 minute delay when we arrived which they let us know right away and apologised, because there was a "problem" which would need 15 more minutes to sort out. Immediately we felt so sombre because we thought it was likely that some poor lady having her scan had discovered something wrong. A tear-stained lady came out about 15 minutes later and was showed to the Early Pregnancy Unit by a member of the reception staff. :( We just felt so sad for her, whatever the issue was, and I felt nervous about whether my own little one would be okay.

A few minutes later we were called in, and the lady commented on the enormity of my file, haha! It contains all my records from all my previous pregnancies and births, as they were made at the time. My file is FOUR INCHES thick with paperwork, and is held together with rubber bands. The funniest thing is that on the front cover it says in huge letters, "VOL. 2" hahaha! ;) That's just the second volume! She said she thinks they ought to start volume 3 because the rest of my pregnancy paperwork will never fit into volume 2! ;) I told her we had had a lot of babies, and she asked how many children we had. I said six, and she made impressed noises! Then she started the scan.

I wore - and I want to note it because I want to remember - I wore a DRESS. Never worn a dress to a scan before, because - how impractical?!! I really wanted to wear my denim pinafore (jumper, in the States) maternity dress because I love it, I feel pretty in it because it is a flattering shape to a baby bump, and because it suited the weather well. I wore it over a very pink maternity T-shirt, and I even wore pink underwear. I have my nails glittery, and my toenails glittered with my summer sandals on. On the way out I wanted to tie my hair back, and the first hairband I grabbed from the bowl was hot pink! ;) I felt REALLY silly for my internal thoughts, but in my heart I was thinking, "I'll feel silly if it's a boy, but impractical or not, I'm wearing this in honour of my DAUGHTER." I felt DAFT, seriously, but the feeling was nice and strong, so I went with it and enjoyed it for however long it was going to last! It was fun anyway! :)

So of course I had to hoist up my dress for the scan. I went with unbuttoning a section of it at first, but the sonographer just said, "Probably best to just lift the whole thing up, if that's okay." lol! So I did - I don't mind anyway. They put a ton of paper tucked into your underwear over your lap anyway.

She asked straight away if we wanted to know the sex of the baby, and I said, "Yes please!" She asked what we had already, and I said, "Six boys." She said, "Oh my goodness!" but was very laid-back about it really. We knew from previous scans that they always do all the measurements and checks first, and the gender check last of all. The scan takes at least 20 minutes even if everything is easy to spot and measure, so it's a while to wait to find out! At a couple of points during the scan, I was almost dizzy with anticipation and didn't know how I would bear it another second! Crazy. I am not normally like that at the scans, but then usually I am just waiting for confirmation that it's a boy, and this time is the first time I really thought we might be looking at our first baby girl - definitely exciting and the anticipation was difficult to bear at times!

It was so lovely seeing our little one! Straight away we could see a little heart beating strongly, and the first proper image we got (seconds into the scan) was this profile shot, which was clear enough for the sonographer to take a print of for us straight away:

The baby was so quiet, and as the lady pointed out, chin firmly on the chest! See those little pursed lips with how hard the chin was pressed down! Precious! :) I think the baby was asleep because, right after that the sonographer had to start being a bit more firm with the probey thing to get some head measurements and at that moment, the baby did a huge stretch! Huuuuuuge!! She said, "Baby's stretching its arm riiiight up over its head, can you see?" It was a real proper just-waking-up-from-a-deep-sleep stretch, with the arched spine and twist over to the side with the reaching arm and everything. The other arm was scrunched right in to the chest during that stretch - a proper waking stretch! :) She got a picture of the baby mid-stretch - you can't see the arm over the head though, but it's up there:

After that followed LOTS of very active wiggling, turning over and kicking about! She kept saying, "A right old wiggler!" and started to have a bit of trouble getting the measurements, but thankfully the baby didn't go too crazy for long, and settled down for patches here and there so measurements were easy to get done. The two head measurements (bi-parietal diameter and head circumference) were both dated as 20 weeks and 2 days (I'm 20 weeks and 3 days, so pretty spot on!). We saw the stomach full of fluid, and the baby's little mouth opening and closing sometimes. The baby turned its head this way and that - the lady said it was like the baby was shaking its head in response to her suggestion that we get some head measurements, lol!

She did a close-up on the baby's little face to check the upper lift for a cleft (none there), and OH it was so beautiful! I always love this particular view of my babies in utero. I wish we had a picture, but the alloted number for each person is 2 (cost £5 this time!!! Used to be £3 which was bad enough!), and she was kind enough to give us 3 as it was. The shape of this baby's nose and lips I have seen a LOT of times before. I look at them every day. They are definitely the same nose and lips as some of the big brothers (they look identical to the view of Matthew's which I DID get a picture of, at his scan), and it was lovely and warming to see such visual evidence before birth that this baby is definitely "one of mine"! :)

She showed us the legs and feet, and I was thinking, "I don't want to see any clues, I don't want to see any clues!" I soooo didn't want to accidentally see "something" before it was time to take a proper look. I wanted a full surprise! Then she showed us from underneath, where the umbilical cord joined the baby, and it took only a second to flash through the depth of field from below the baby to a cross-section of the abdomen, higher up. In that second I could have sworn I saw a flash of 3 lines between the legs, and NO protrusion at all, but it was a split second, and I put it out of my head as fast as I could.

Then we went back to an image of the baby, who was back in a relaxing position. The little hand was moving about near the baby's mouth, and she printed out another picture of that for us. I like the slightly open mouth, as though contemplating whether or not to suck those fingers or the thumb! :)

We saw the kidneys, feet (not curly! Yay!), and she measured the abdominal circumference (dated at 20 weeks and 4 days! Great!) and measured the little teeny bones in the arms and legs. The femur length was dated as 20 weeks and FIVE days! This baby is not going to be Arthur/Benjamin-shaped! They have bigger heads than average (2 weeks ahead!) and shorter legs (2 weeks behind!). The other body shape we do (Neil's) is all the measurements pretty much spot on for dates. So this baby seems to be following that pattern. The last baby I birthed with the bigger head pattern (Benjamin) had a FIFTEEN INCH head (I kid you not) at birth - to compare, Elijah's was 12.75 inches, on the small side of average. 15 inches = owch. So that part of the measurements of this particular baby is a nice thing! ;)

Then when all the measurements and things were done, she said, "Right then..." and we knew she was about to check the gender! :) I couldn't really tell what she was doing at first, although I couldn't see the usual evidence of gender that I was used to, so I wasn't sure what I was seeing at first, as she was changing the view quite a bit and I couldn't see the v-shape of the legs either side most of the time, so I wasn't sure if it was the right shot yet. Then she gave a sort of sigh (like a light-hearted one though), and said, "You'll have to have another one after this." I think my heart about stopped and I said slowly, "Whhyyyy?" in a doubtful sort of way, before I realised what she meant - I thought at first that she meant it was a boy and we'd have to have another one if we wanted a chance of a girl! She simply answered, "To keep this one company!" and then I realised what she meant and I went round-eyed and mouthed as she swung the screen that she was looking at around to face me - we were watching the one up just below the ceiling, and hers was right next to my head. She paused the scan at the perfect v-shaped legs shot. I wish I had a picture to show you, it was so clear, I could even draw it from memory, lol! V-shaped legs, NOTHING protruding whatsoever, and a flatness in between, with the classic 3 lines. There was a brief moment of silence and then I said, "It's a GIRL!!!" My voice broke on the word girl - I didn't expect to get tearful, but it suddenly overwhelmed me, all this emotion and joy and excitement. I never thought I would hear my own voice say (of one of my own children!), "It's a girl"!! I didn't cry and cry or anything, though I could have, ohhhhh I could have, lol! I tried not to, and wiped my eyes and blinked a lot and didn't speak for a while because I would have just criiiiieeed. I have been ultra weepy this past week at the slightest thing, so I figured hormones had a lot to do with it too! I didn't want to come out of the room looking all like something was wrong because I had been crying, and I didn't want to look like that when we arrived home either.

I was just flabbergasted, honestly, lost for words for a while as she continued the scan. The first thing I said was, "Are you SURE?!" although it was obvious obvious obvious what I was looking at. She smiled and went back to the live scan (not the paused picture) and we looked again. She changed the angle slightly and zoomed in a bit, and said, "Look, it's really clear - you can even see the labia clearly." Neil was so funny, he sort of went all uncomfortable and averted his eyes a bit, saying, "I don't feel like I should be looking at this!" hehehe! His first disbelieving comment, by the way, was, "How are we going to name her?!" because we've never agreed on girls names easily (or at all!) in the past! I had told him in the waiting area that I wasn't sure about Toby Joseph any more, and I didn't know what to do about it. He just listened and hmmmed and was generally understanding. I guess the wobble about Toby's name was because this baby wasn't a boy! :)

The sonographer had one more check over every part of the baby, while I didn't take much of it in at all from that point, as I felt almost physically giddy with the news we'd just had, and like almost in shock over it, lol! I couldn't concentrate on anything and I just kept saying, "I can't believe it!" if I said anything at all! At the very end of the scan, she said she would let us see again, and showed us the very obvious girly shot for the last time. :) Definitely a girl!

Soooo, since then we have come home, and told the boys and Heather. They all were crowding and jumping up and down, shouting and yelling, "What baby IS it?!!" as we came in the door. Some were at the kitchen table drawing, and Elijah was in the booster seat at the table having a snack and a drink, but Heather got him out straight away so I could give him a cuddle, as he'd got a bit grizzly in the last few minutes before we got home. Other than that, all six boys were fine and well-behaved while we were out, which was a relief! Samuel had seemed upset to see us go when we were about to leave, because he'd just woken from a spontaneous nap, and was a bit groggy, but apparently he was fine. Heather started reading them a story just as we left and they didn't even go to the window to see us leave - very reassuring! And then we weren't long - maybe 90 minutes from leaving the house to getting back there.

Anyway, we waited until we had all the boys around us, and they sat patiently on the sofa to hear the news. Heather sat on the school table, and I held Elijah. I said, "Our baby is.... a... GIRL baby!" and they all started making a lot of squealing and yelling noises (happy ones!) and Heather started whooping and cheering, and came right over to hug me, saying, "I KNEW it!" hehe! I asked her how she knew, and she said because my pregnancy had been different, even if subtly so. Morning sickness starting a bit early, and being a bit worse, etc. It was a happy moment! The boys all seemed thrilled and excited, but quickly went back to their activities they'd been doing before, so that's all good. Nobody was disappointed or anxious-looking. A sister! A sister for my boys! How wonderful! :)

The rest of the day has been filled with usual boy-wrangling, dinner, bedtime, and phoning various family members (and updating Facebook, which has been wonderful fun with all the lovely comments and messages!). I phoned my parents first and they were happy and excited. This baby is their 10th grandchild (they only have two children - never in their wildest dreams would they have expected probably even half the number of grandchildren, haha!), and only their second granddaughter. My brother's eldest, Thea, is six, and she now has two little brothers, ages 3, and 6 months. On Neil's side, his two sisters are the only ones with children. One sister has two daughters, aged nearly 8, and nearly 5. The other has a 2-year-old daughter. It's so nice to have a girl for both sides of the family! :) It's the 10th grandchild for Neil's mum too!

I have already had people saying they'll send their baby girl clothes that they've had in the loft (two lots of girl cousin clothes from different family members, and some offers from friends as well), and I told my mum I thought we might be a bit inundated with girly clothes - which is wonderful because we're on quite a tight budget and it will be a blessing to get nice girly clothes (obviously we have none!) without paying any money for them. She didn't say anything much to that, and I said that of course I still wanted to buy some cute little outfits, to which she said, "Oh YES! Mummy (meaning her) will be going to Monsoon!" lol! I hope she doesn't break the bank! She loves shopping for her granddaughter, and has always said she would love to do the same for a daughter of mine.

Neil's mum was excited, Heather's daughter could be heard squealing for AGES down the phone, which amused the boys no end, lol! And my brother was suitably high-pitched with excitement when I phoned him this evening too! :) This is so. much. lovely fun! I would ABSOLUTELY have been joyful and excited to be having a baby boy as well, and would have enjoyed telling everyone, but I admit (and feel somewhat guilty for doing so) that it's MUCH MORE fun to get to tell everyone that the baby is a girl. I think it's just because we've never done it before though, you know?

So, as far as names go... We didn't have ANY idea. The only name I had in my head up until today was Maisie, and I knew Neil didn't like that one.

This evening we chatted briefly about it and I said that it was going to be really hard to name her! I had no idea, and nor did Neil. I said I would set out to make a shortlist but that he would probably veto everything, and then he'd make a shortlist and I'd veto the lot, lol! That's what we've done in the past! So, while he caught up on his online stuff, I started wading through girl names on various websites. I didn't go through all the letters of the alphabet, but I was able to make a fairly good-sized shortlist of the letters I did look at:

Maisie
Rachel
Rosalie
Sophie
Charlotte
Bella
Elizabeth (Beth)
Isabelle
Johannah
Josie
Lydia

I just wanted something that I found pretty and girly, as well as (preferably) with a nice meaning. I didn't give any of those names much thought, just jotted them down as I saw them. Elizabeth is Neil's mum's middle name and we were not sure what to do about the middle name situation for our baby girl, because we don't want to use two middle names (we just don't), and yet we wanted to name our first baby girl after my mum (Jane) and the second after Neil's mum (Averil) - but what if this is our ONLY baby girl?! We don't want to never use one of our mother's names. I wondered about using Elizabeth as a first name with Jane as the middle one, but we aren't enamoured enough with Elizabeth to do that, I think.

I told Neil my shortlist at the end of the evening, and he listened carefully and then asked me to read them again. He said he liked Sophie, Josie and Lydia, and maybe Elizabeth (we would use a derivative of the name for actual daily use with our little one). He asked me to find and read out the meanings of each of those names, so I did. Sophie means wisdom. Elizabeth is "God is my vow", Josie is listed as the female version of Joseph, which we both lit up to when we read it, and I love that because it means "He will enlarge" (as in, family size - more children). And Lydia means "of noble sort" or it can mean "from Lydia" as in the town.

We talked about girly-ness, and the feel of the various names, and the way they go with our surname and potential middle name choices, and the rest of the children's names when we say them all together, and SUDDENLY we had a certainty about it. One name stood out and we both realised that we loved it! Neil came back in after that decision and said the name again, and then said, "That's the one. It's too pretty." and that is exactly how I feel about it. I feel like we should sleep on it in case we feel differently tomorrow, but for tonight I am SO EXCITED about the name because I love it so much. I am nervous to share in case I change my mind and choose something else, but I'm too excited not to (it's a big deal, choosing and deciding on my first daughter's name!) so I'm going to share here anyway.

Our baby girl is called Lydia Jane. I want to say "for now", lol! It still feels so surreal to think that we have a girl at ALL, so naming a girl feels not real at all. Maybe we will change her name yet, there's plenty of time. But every time I say it out loud or think it in my head, I fall in love with it that little bit more, and something inside me scrunches up with joy and makes me want to squeal a bit! ;)

Lydia. Lydia Jane. It goes with our surname, and the list of boys' names. Neil wondered about Lydia Averil Jane, but then he said, "Lydia Jane.... nah, it's just too pretty like that. Lydia Jane it is!" :) I said, "We'll just have to have some more babies." and he seemed okay with that idea! ;) I said my favourite name to go with Averil is Grace - Grace Averil. I like the idea of calling her Gracie. He likes it too, so maybe God will bless us with another daughter yet and we'll have the opportunity to honour both of our mothers. I hope his mum won't mind, this time... I know mine will be thrilled, but she did say today on the phone that I mustn't feel "required of" to use her name for a middle name, as I'd told her we wanted to years ago. She was worried it would restrict us, and she also didn't want us to leave Neil's mum out.

But I'm so so happy with Lydia Jane. I love the name Lydia, more and more every time I think of it. It's so soft and girly, but simple and short. I immediately know I will end up calling her Lydie a lot. When I put my hand on my bump and whisper, "Lydia", just to get a feel for it, my heart swells so that I might possibly explode. Or implode. Or something pressure-related. It's almost too much to take in, all in one day - one afternoon! Just a few hours. A girl! A name! A million gorgeous happy compliments and messages. Happy family members. The blessing of a healthy baby, growing right on target. The absolute desire of my heart, that God knew I longed for - a daughter. MY daughter. My OWN daughter. I can't comprehend it, this amount of blessing from such a loving and gracious God. I know He is just laughing for joy at my happy disbelieving heart - I can feel it. I love Him so very much! I'm so grateful for my healthy baby girl! I will probably not believe it properly for quite some time to come, and maybe my posts are going to be a bit heavy on the GIRL front for a while as I process it, but oh well! ;)

My head is aching so much, and my cheeks/jaw too, probably from all the overexcitement and smiling a lot (have I been?! I guess I must have!), and it's ridiculously late now, but it's the weekend so it could be worse! ;) I planned to go to bed and update tomorrow, because of my headache, but when it came to it I just COULDN'T without venting the whooooole thing here first! :) I'm glad I did!

I will update again soon! I'm having a GIRL! I just can't believe it! :D

20 weeks, 2 days

I'm going to bed now, but I had to come here and say:

MY SCAN IS TOMORROWWWWWWWWW!!!! :D

So excited to see my little one, and finally know (hopefully!) one way or the other whether I am having a boy or a girl. I look at my 12 week scan pictures, at the nub shots, and think, "Well, it just HAS to be a girl, surely?!" and then I think that I can't FATHOM tomorrow going ahead and finding out it's a girl, not REALLY truly actually. I mean, like it's impossible, lol! So I remember that the nub shots were quite early for the theory to be accurate, and then I'm right in the 50/50 camp again, not able to lean one way or the other. I think I am going to be surprised whichever gender the baby turns out to be, for different reasons! ;) I will be so surprised if it's a boy because of my gut feeling and the nub shots. Soooo surprised. But I will be flat-out SHOCKED if it's a girl, because I feel well seasoned at having babies and scans and pregnancies now, and I can't really remember a time properly when I wasn't doing this now... And yet, alllllll of that - my only experience has been as a mummy to BOYS! So, shocked, yes.

I just can't wait to know, one way or the other! I am excited to know if the baby is a boy, even though I would love to have a girl.

The only thing is that this week I am suddenly having niggling doubts about the name Toby Joseph... Not sure why, maybe now that it's really close to actually GIVING the name to a real live baby and it being HIS from then on, maybe it feels like I shouldn't, you know? Maybe it feels like it's already Toby David's name and so it doesn't feel right as it becomes more real. I don't know. Or maybe I'm just having a random wobble (seriously hormonal again these past few days, just another burst of them I think, as I'm feeling irritable and weepy a lot and not awfully tolerant of noises and breastfeeding and so on.) and everything will be perfectly fine with using that name as soon as we find out it's a boy? Or maybe the wobble about the name is because it's not a boy?! ;) I will know tomorrow!!! Wheeee! So exciting!!

Most of all, I hope he or she is healthy. I always feel so nervous as the 20 week scan approaches, especially as I've had so many babies already. Totally irrational, I'm sure, but I tend to get the feeling that statistically, since I've already had so many healthy babies, maybe something will be wrong with this next one. This time my concern (paranoia?!) about it means that we're taking the digital voice recorder with us so that if something is wrong (it's just Neil and I going, all the boys are staying home with Heather) and we have to see a consultant right after the scan, I know I will want Heather to be there, and because she can't, at least I will be able to record the entire discussion and she can play it back without me having to remember all the important details, or emotionally exhaust myself dragging through everything that was said, and be up to date on everything. Crazy, I know. But it will set my mind at rest to take it with us.

Anyway, I hope I have a healthy little baby in there, and that he or she cooperates beautifully for the scan! I really want to be back with my boys without too much delay, and we've had one or two babies in the past who haven't been in a useful enough position for measuring important things like the heart, and we've ended up taking hours at the hospital walking around while the next couple of ladies get scanned, to try and encourage the baby into a better position! Also, I reeeeally hope it's not difficult to get a good clear view of the gender! :)

If the baby is a boy, I can't say for sure any more that his name will automatically be Toby Joseph, with how I've been feeling this week. I haven't had chance to talk to Neil about it, but if we find out that it's a boy tomorrow, I know we'll be able to talk it over then, and I'll update here with our thoughts on it when I share news and photos in my next entry. We shall see.

Other bits of news so that I don't forget: I weighed 10 stone exactly yesterday, 3lbs less than before the tummy bug, which feels like weeks ago now. I can't remember my initial weight at the beginning of the pregnancy, so I've no idea how much I've gained so far, but thankfully I DON'T CARE! ;)

My bump has had a growth spurt this week, and I look DEFINITELY pregnant now. I make a proper pregnant shape under a maternity dress, which is nice! :) I had a sudden urge for glittery nails this week so have painted my toenails with the same sparkly stuff that I bought to go into labour with Elijah! I put the same on my fingernails too, which I don't think I have done since I was a really little girl and my mummy painted my nails for me one time. I have been a terribly heavy-duty nail-biter since early childhood, and the only time I ever manage to grow my nails is when I'm pregnant and morning sick, lol! I can't stand to put my fingers anywhere near my mouth when I'm morning sick, so my nails grow well for months. Right now I think I am back out of morning sickness - I can finally eat things with onions in without paying for it with nausea, and generally feel fine, but I do get a bit queasy when I go to bite my fingers/nails, so maybe it's juuuuust hanging in there a bit. Anyway, bonus - lovely looking strong nails! They are very strong this pregnancy - I can open tin cans with just my nail and the ring pull! :) So I smile every time I look at my hands and see the light catch the glitter on my nails. I am truly girly at heart! :)

Baby is kicking about quite a lot now, and it's easy to feel with my hand. I am LOVING it! :) I'm noticing Braxton Hicks contractions quite a lot as well now, sometimes distracting with the squeezy uncomfy feeling, but usually just a mild sensation. More if I'm dehydrated at all, or if I do too much physically (already!). The back of my pelvis hurts from taking the boys out to the park and pushing the tandem pushchair (with a helper!) yesterday, which isn't brilliant at 20 weeks, but oh well! Such is life, and I'm grateful that I recover between pregnancies. My friend with 6 children who we visit sometimes, has constant pelvic/SPD issues even between pregnancies, and her babies are spaced 2 years apart. :( So I'm glad to have some recovery between my pregnancies.

Okay it's late, and I need to get to bed! I can't think of anything else. No cravings to note, no particular food aversions or preferences. Very run-of-the-mill, lol!

I will update tomorrroooowwwww, yay!!!! :D