Really and honestly a SHORTER entry tonight! ;)
I just saw that I had not updated here since just before 30 weeks, so even though I was about to shut down the laptop and go to bed, I wanted to QUICKLY update (we'll see, hehe!) just so this poor blog isn't being so neglected! I'll try to be brief and pad out the details in a later entry.
Sooo I will be 33 weeks pregnant tomorrow! Where is the time going?! Only 7 weeks to go until my due date - amazing! I absolutely CAN'T WAIT to meet Samuel now! Except that I am so so so enjoying carrying him inside me, so I am in no way wishing pregnancy away, and I hope I never do, even when it gets really uncomfy at the end and all the hormones kick in. I. Love. Being pregnant. Totally love it. It's such an amazing blessing. Can't believe I have nearly been through an entire pregnancy five times now! It really doesn't feel possible!
It's less than three weeks to the time in Nathan's pregnancy where my waters broke and he was born. My tiny little manny is getting not-so-tiny-any-more! He now weighs about 4.5lbs already, and is only a couple of inches short of normal newborn baby length!
I was so happy with my weight gain (yes, I started weighing myself at last, haha!) - at 29 weeks I had gained only 17lbs which is WAY less than any of my previous pregnancies (usually at this kind of stage I gave gained about a lb per week of pregnancy). At 31 weeks I had gained another 2lbs, putting my total gain at about 19lbs. I was really mainly weighing myself so soon after the previous time because I was so agog at the scales - still only 11 stone 5lbs! I think I was up to 13 stone last time - yikes!
This past week I have been feeling like there has been (yet another - there have been lots recently!) a major growth spurt going on for Samuel. Sure enough yesterday and the day before I felt horrible and sluggish and yucky, as I am becoming very familiar with over the years when my little ones have major growth spurts. I had no appetite and just felt exhausted and lethargic all the time. I slept like a log for hours any time I got chance, which believe me is a WONDERFUL improvement on the previous FOUR weeks, urgh! I have really struggled with insomnia this pregnancy, way more than the previous times, and pretty much only got one "good" night of sleep a week for a few weeks running (a good night is about 6 broken hours. It's wonderful in comparison with the 1-2 broken hours I was getting outside of that! I have no idea how I was functioning!).
Then today my appetite seemed better and I didn't feel gross and like a slug. At the same time I am just huffing and puffing around the house in an almost ridiculous manner. I just feel so huge, but I know it's not that I'm necessarily that HUGE, just that I have really grown in just a couple of days, so there's a certain adjustment to be made! I just can't stand being in the kitchen these days, because there's very little space in there to move about around our big family table in a small kitchen. It's cluttered and the floor is the laundry-sorting zone, and ugh. I can't get down to the floor (or up again if I should dare to try!), and I have to move chairs out of the way to get around the table to the sink! It drives me crazy and I just feel so HUGE and cumbersome. I'm also opening the fridge door against my bump and various similar silly things because I'm not used to how far it sticks out! Little manny has really grown suddenly.
Tonight I was feeling so heavy and large that I got to wondering if I had put on some more weight. My jeans are feeling tighter too. I was kind of taken aback to discover I now weigh exactly 12 stone - that's a gain of 9lbs since I weighed myself 9 days ago!!!!! Yikers. That explains a lot, and it should NOT be a big deal, but I am kind of bummed, just a little bit. Mainly because I wasn't expecting to put so much on so fast! And I was pretty glad to be gaining less this pregnancy. I think that puts my total gain now at 29lbs - getting close to the "one lb per week of pregnancy" thing again after all.
I am having a lot of pelvic and lower back pain if I move at all. It's worst when I move from being still for any length of time, but especially from lying on my side like at night or reclining in the evening. I have had quite a lot of pelvic/back pain this pregnancy but not in a way to make me feel like I'm having a hard time with it. It is there a lot, but sometimes it is worse than other times. Right now I guess my pelvis and back are under more strain suddenly with the fast weight gain? I don't know. Anyway, it's very painful to get up from lying down - mostly on my left side of my pelvis at the back. Samuel is mostly head down now at last (yay!) but I notice he does prefer to be oblique with his head in my left hip. I feel his head blipping against that hip (right IN it sometimes!) when he has hiccups. Sometimes I feel his head central in my pelvis when he is hiccuping but more often than not he is slightly oblique. Perhaps that's why that side of my pelvis is complaining so much?
The last two days I have also had some awful ligament pains just lying in bed. The searing type that are hard to breathe through. I usually would only get those twisting funny as I get up or something (which I am careful not to do!), but I was just lying in bed! I changed position but nothing made it go away, even hoisting my bump onto a little wedge-shaped pillow. Usually if I take the strain of my ligaments by supporting my bump or changing position, the searing pain fades off, but my guess is that it was something to do with a bigger-than-the-day-before baby in a slightly awkward position in there putting the strain on things. I had to get up and lean right forwards with my bump sort of "hanging" down in the end to get the pain to ease off, and then when I lay back down again it was okay. Weird! A few weeks ago that happened one time and when I felt my tummy, Samuel was transverse - head in my side and bottom in the other, which is where the pain was! Not this time though. I can't fathom how uncomfortable it must be to have a full-term baby in transverse position!
Admittedly I am snacking more during the evening these days! :S And I really am getting a sweet tooth again now too. Loving chocolate and mint imperials at the moment, but TRYING not to eat too much of the stuff! My appetite is pretty normal otherwise, and I'm eating normal sized portions of meals, not crazy pregnant lady sized portions like I have done with some of my other pregnancies! ;) Maybe that's still to come though? No cravings to report for a while now, but I'm enjoying food in general (unless I'm post-growth-spurt, in which case I don't want a THING to eat).
Samuel feels so much bigger in there lately! Even before the growth spurt he did. Now if I feel my tummy to check his position and find his head low and central, it feels SO WIDE compared to a few weeks ago! It seems to fill my pelvis much more. I don't think he's any lower though. He is usually high and free out of my pelvis still, or oblique. His movements are nearly all squirms and wiggles now, and I can really tell he has almost run out of space in there. No more big thumps or kicks, though he does try on occasion - when he does, it HURTS! There is not much room to give me a big kick, and he's much stronger than he used to be. It takes my breath away when he kicks me, but it's not very often now. I feel his fingers fidgetting and "pinging" at my insides sometimes. I love that feeling, because I like to be able to identify his little fingers just from the way it feels. I can't wait to kiss and stroke those tiny little fingies in a couple of months! It seems so surreal - I can hardly believe it's going to happen even! His feet are much bigger than they were a few weeks ago. Sometimes when he pushes one out high up near my ribs, I can almost take hold of it, and they are much more than an inch long now. A few days ago he was head down for a day or two, with his back along the right side of my bump. I am SURE he had one leg curled under him (which he could kick my ribs with - I can't believe my womb comes up so high now! I still have a hard time believing I am THIS far along already, so it's very surreal sometimes!), and the other leg splinted up his body. He would push both legs at the same time and one would poke my ribs upwards while the other pushed hard out of my side near my hip, low down. That low down foot was VERY uncomfortable when he pushed it out! I could feel with my hands that they were both feet though, so I'm sure that was his position.
I have my next midwife appointment at 34 weeks on November 1st. I MUST remember to ask for my maternity NHS exemption card and the grant thingy that I'm eligible for from 25 weeks (£190). We REALLY need any little bit of money we can find, and my last exemption card ran out in July when Benjamin turned one. I admit they didn't question my status when I went to the dentist a couple of weeks ago though, even without my card! ;) Free dental care for me, due to looking like the side of a house, haha! ;)
On November 4th I have my scan to check my placenta, and the consultant appointment after it. I wish Heather could go with me, but she can't this time. I will be going on my own so that Neil can watch the boys. I am noticing (over the past couple of weeks) that I am getting kind of anxious about the birth - specifically over the possibility of bleeding afterwards. Neil said last week that it must be getting time for me to write my birth plan, and I just did NOT want to think about it at all - that made me stop and think why not, because it was odd of me to feel that strongly when he mentioned it. I discovered I have been squashing down all sorts of anxious thoughts about it. Hmmm. I have random thoughts when doing things like ordering Christmas presents for the boys sometimes too - like, "I hope I'm still here to see him open this..." I know it sounds CRAZY but somewhere along the line I have got myself pretty scared of bleeding to DEATH when the placenta is delivered. Urgh. I think that's probably silly because I don't think it's likely that I would DIE from it if I did haemmorhage? I will ask the consultant to put my mind at rest! It would still be an emergency situation, obviously, but I don't think a fatal one if action was being taken, even in a homebirth situation (as the consultant told me last time). So I should get that kind of thought out of my head! I didn't even realise it was there until I stopped to question... so subtle and scary. I still feel very anxious about the birth - not the BIRTH itself, but my anxiety about the 3rd stage is high enough that I think it would begin to hinder me labouring and birthing effectively as the 2nd stage approached. Hmmm.
Once I had realised all this, I asked Neil to pray with me and he did. And as we prayed, God showed me that I have nothing to fear. Not because it'll all be fine and dandy, but because He loves me, and I am in His hands, and I can trust Him no matter what happens. Because His plan is perfect and good, and He has plans to prosper me and not to harm me. He is the Creator of the universe and there I was worrying about my placenta! Suddenly it seems so silly! ;) He also reminded me that He cares about the details, and He is more than able to handle it. So I felt MUCH better after that, but a week later the anxiety is creeping back.
I also decided that I would like to book a homebirth. The setting really doesn't matter to me, because the risk is no lower at home than at hospital, I live literally 5 minutes from a major hospital, and my anxiety over bleeding will honestly be just as high in hospital as at home. If all goes well and I DON'T bleed or need a manual removal of that extra lobe, I will be so so so so glad to be at home. There is a lot of stress and inconvenience for me with having a hospital birth, aside from the placenta issue this time around, so that has to be considered as well. If the scan and consultant appointment goes fine and he is still happy for me to give birth at home, I'll plan to do that. If he has reason to say I should not be at home, then I'll take that into proper consideration (and probably have a hospital birth). I decided I'll have a "managed" 3rd stage though, wherever I am. I didn't want to before, but I think it's probably for the best and it will lower my risk (at home or in hospital). I'm obviously praying that I will have NO excessive bleeding of any sort, and that my placenta just plops out intact, lobe and all, and that's it and all about it! But I am also praying that I might labour and give birth after the boys are in bed for the night this time, so that I can be downstairs in the living room. It's more open and less claustrophobic than the tiny bedroom I've recently moved into (I was in the bigger one for Benjamin's birth and even that wasn't too roomy when full of midwives!), and it's also right at the front door if I needed to transfer to hospital for any reason. The boys also would not have to see anything "difficult" if anything did go wrong.
Oh I so hope it doesn't! It really really makes no difference where I am, I just so want it all to go okay. The bleeding issue that everyone keeps on at me about is making me so anxious! :( The majority of these placentas do just pop out in one piece without any complications, but I know I have to be prepared for it not to as well. Please pray for me that it will be okay, and that I won't be scared, because I really sort of am.
My sweet little Samuel is awake suddenly and sweeping a tiny foot gently back and forth at the top of my bump. Okay less gently now, lol! I think because I am leaning forward over my bump to type this and he doesn't really like it when I squash my bump in any way now. I wonder how big he'll be when he's born?! I'm guessing over 8lbs for sure if he goes to my due date - well, mayyyybe not - Matthew was a week late and still only 7lbs 11oz... But I think it's more likely he'll weigh over 8lbs. I would love it if Benjamin remained the record holder though! ;) 8lbs 11oz is heavy enough for my little frame, even if it IS bigger than it used to be!
Okay I must go to bed. I'll update again soon! There's sure to be stuff I haven't said but I am purposely cutting this short so I can get some sleep now! Thanks for the comments on my last entry! :) Oh! I do have a 30 week belly picture which I haven't put on the computer yet (I'll get to it soon!), but I just realised I didn't get a 32 week one and I'm 33 weeks tomorrow! Poo! Oh well, maybe I'll get a 33 week one instead, and another at 34 weeks? I'll update with pics soon!
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Saturday, October 2, 2010
29 weeks, 5 days
THIRTY weeks pregnant on Monday!!!! I always get excited about the 30s because that's definitely the "home stretch" - there's nothing left after the 30s except arriving at my due date! :)
I'm also so excited to have actually updated within a week of my last entry, haha! ;) Yay! I put the 28 week belly picture up in the gallery tonight, but I've just realised that I MUST remember to take another one in a few days for 30 weeks! I really really want to keep up with the remaining belly pics for the rest of this pregnancy. It's all going by so fast and I want memories to LOOK at! I'm loving it so much...
Well, I have had an interesting week, pregnancy-wise! It's been a really stressy week and quite intensive physically too, given that we've moved the bedrooms round in preparation for Samuel's arrival (the boys are finally in their new bedroom and no longer sleeping on the living room floor - hoorah!), and THEN we had some sweet friends come round and help us lay laminate floor in our living room and porch! Well, I say "help" but actually Neil was in charge of occupying the boys (taking them out for a whole day by himself one of the two days it was being laid!) and I was only slightly helping with the floor, since they wouldn't let me do much because I'm pregnant! Sooooooooo sweet of them, and Neil was a wonder man with the boys. Now we have beautiful new floor and are working on getting the furniture (and contents) back to normal all over the house. We had stuff piled EVERYWHERE to get it all out of the living room for a few days. It was NO FUN but soooooo worth it, and I'm so grateful! :)
I found it really stressy having everything in upheaval in my home when I'm huge and hormonal and getting distinctly nesty. I spent a lot of time packing things in boxes and carrying SMALL (!) piles of things from bedroom to bedroom, and rebuilding the bunk beds, etc. And one evening I had bad backache and very strong Braxton Hicks contractions that started late afternoon and by the boys' bedtime I wasn't feeling very well. I felt sort of faint and queasy. I had a bath but didn't feel better, and then I just lay down in the junk room that was the boys'-bedroom-to-be (while they slept on the living room floor) and tried to relax. My Braxton Hicks ranged from bothersomely uncomfortable (distracting me from things) to painful, and they were regular, coming between 2 and 3.5 minutes apart and lasting anywhere between 45 seconds and 1.5 minutes. Not ideal! But even as I tried to relax for the entire evening, they kept on like that without stopping. By 9.45pm it had been over an hour, so I went to Contraction Master online and started to time them properly. Regular as clockwork, very close together and stronger than I'm used to as far as Braxton Hicks go. I still didn't feel well either. I wondered if it could have been down to dehydration so I started to drink water at that point. I hadn't had much to drink and I'd done lots of stuff that made me sweat a lot during the afternoon.
By 11pm I was feeling MUCH better, but the contractions were continuing to come frequently and regularly. I posted at Facebook about it and people were saying I should phone the midwife, but I was reluctant because they DID still feel like Braxton Hicks (and hadn't got stronger over the hours), albeit strong ones, and I just REALLY didn't want the midwife to say I should go into hospital to be checked at 11pm! I just wanted to go to bed, I was so tired! I happened to find an email from Heather (my doula) and replied to it, and ended up writing all about the Braxton Hicks and the way I had been feeling that evening. I knew she wouldn't get it till the next morning, but I felt better for just SAYING to someone about it and then going to bed.
I wasn't particularly bothered by Braxton Hicks during the night whenever I was up with Benjamin, and the next morning all seemed calm. Heather phoned to say that she was going to a meeting at the hospital with the Head of Midwifery and would I like her to mention my Braxton Hicks and see if she had any advice? I had some fairly strong Braxton Hicks through the day but quite far and few between really, not frequent or regular, so that was okay. Heather phoned later in the day to have a long chat. She had seen two different midwives in management at the hospital and asked each of them about my placenta (Heather is brilliant!), and also mentioned my Braxton Hicks. She said they were not concerned, though it was not normal, because it hadn't progressed into anything and had all cleared up overnight, but if it happened again before my consultant appointment on Thursday (a couple of days later) I should probably phone labour ward and perhaps go in to be checked if they suggest it, just to rule out two possible causes: UTI or constipation. I had no symptoms of a urine infection, but hmmmm, I'm nearly always constipated, pregnant or not. I just hadn't given it any thought as a cause since it's a norm for me.
That day I did much less active stuff and was more careful! But as I was putting Benjamin to bed, right on cue the Braxton Hicks began again, close together and quite strong. This time I chose to ignore them as much as I possibly could and just do my normal thing. It helped that I felt well that evening, and not yucky and weak like the evening before. I know I'm stubborn and should probably have phoned the midwife or something, but I honestly felt that it would turn out to be nothing and I did NOT want to go in for monitoring when it was 99% likely to be just that, late at night! So I ignored it, mostly! I didn't time them, but they came pretty frequently. I just relaxed and pootled about online and drank lots of water, and then went to bed when bedtime came along. Sure enough, in the night and the next day - no significant Braxton Hicks :) That day we were laying laminate floor and I constantly felt like I needed to go to the loo and felt quite uncomfy, but never really had the chance to go. By the afternoon the Braxton Hicks started up again, earlier than the previous times, and they were pretty strong by the evening. THEN I finally went for a BM and lo and behold, calm womb since then! So I guess it must have been related. The midwife said that the more babies you have, the more your uterus can become irritable. Things that can irritate it might affect it more with a 5th baby than with the 2nd, for example, so I guess it makes sense! I'm glad it has calmed down though!
The other big thing this week was my consultant appointment. Heather had spoken to a friend of hers who is a very experienced independent midwife, about my succenturiate placenta (that is, a placenta with an extra lobe in a different part of the womb, attached to the main placenta by membranes and blood vessels). She was at a homebirth a few towns away from here last Tuesday and afterwards she was talking to the two midwives there and asked them about me and my succenturiate placenta. She had also discussed it with the Head of Midwifery at the hospital and another midwife there who is pretty high up in management and very experienced. She asked all of them whether this type of placenta precludes having a homebirth. The midwives at the homebirth were from a different hospital to my local one, and were very wary of the idea of a homebirth with a succenturiate placenta. Heather asked what they considered the risks to be, and they listed all these disaster scenarios which had Heather wondering if it was really going to be a BAD idea for me to give birth anywhere except the hospital! Then she asked them how often they'd seen any of those things happen, and they said, "Oh, we've never actually SEEN it happen..." So she supposed that must mean they hadn't actually experienced a succenturiate placenta before, and at that they both said that they'd seen LOTS, but that they had no idea the women HAD a succenturiate placenta in any of the cases - they only discovered it when the placenta popped out with an extra lobe attached to it and they went, "Oooh look!" So that made Heather (and me!) feel better! ;)
The Head of Midwifery and the other "high up" (!) midwife at the hospital both said, "Absolutely not!" when Heather asked them if a succenturiate placenta precludes having a homebirth, and that was encouraging too! They said that it depends on lots of factors - where the placenta is located, where the lobe is located, how many lobes there are, how big they are, the baby's position, etc. Those would be the determining factors in whether to opt for a homebirth or hospital birth. They suggested that I might want to ask the consultant if I can have a scan later in my pregnancy to get some more information about my placenta to help assess the risks. Great idea! I've never had a late pregnancy scan before! :)
So on Thursday morning Neil and I frantically tried to corral kiddies around the task of laying the edging to the new floor (we did not pull this off!) and I ended up setting off to pick Heather up for my appointment leaving Neil with a bad headache (poor love!), 4 "battery" children (having been cooped up in only the upstairs for over 24 hours by then!), a partly finished, very dusty floor, and no furniture at all in the only room that I'd be bringing Heather back to in a couple of hours (we'd arranged a while back that she'd come home with me to see the boys, as they LOVE her and have been longing to see her, and it has been a while!)! I felt so bad leaving but I had to go to my appointment.
It being a consultant appointment, we had to wait AGES as usual, but that was fine. We chatted a lot and Heather knitted. We talked about births a lot - Heather has seen such a lot of gorgeous births, and is a brilliant advocate for change in supporting women's desires for their birth experiences. In August she and an expectant couple made history at our local hospital by having the first ever twin waterbirth in the midwife-led unit!!! Yay for Heather! :) The mother turned up 9cm dilated (having opted to labour at home as long as possible), got straight in the water, pushed out the first twin and then pushed out the second! Brilliant! :) She was 39 weeks and 2 days, and had refused to be induced when they say you have to with twins, at 38 weeks. Two perfect healthy baby girls - 6lbs 8oz and 7lbs 4oz! They went home a few hours later! Amazing, and just how it should be! :) How exciting would that have been to be present at?!?! The midwives must have been on a high for ages! :)
Anyway, I digress! We finally saw my very lovely consultant - the same one we saw last time at 18 weeks. He was very laid-back and supportive as before, and surprised us both by saying he did not feel that I HAD to have a hospital birth at all, but like the Head of Midwifery said, it would depend on many factors. I asked if I could have a scan and he immediately agreed. He said that my 20-week scan indicated that both the placenta and the lobe are high up, at the top of the uterus - my placenta on the front and the lobe on the back. This removes the main risk factor, of bleeding occuring during labour or when the waters break, since it's all up out of the way. The only risk factor he sees is the lobe not coming away and thus me having a big old haemmorrhage. He said that usually the lobe comes away. But sometimes it doesn't. Which sort of sums it up, in a nutshell! ;)
He asked if I had any questions and in my head there was this sort of chirping crickets sound as they both looked at me - my head just felt EMPTY! I had a total pregnancy brain moment! So he changed the question to, "What are your thoughts?" and again, tumbleweeds rolling... I had to admit to having no thoughts of any sort in my head at all, other than the thought of being embarrassed to be having such a brainless moment, haha! Thankfully Heather stepped in and started asking a ton of questions while I listened and took in the answers! So glad she was with me! :)
She asked what the procedure would be in hospital if I bleed, and exactly how they would treat me. Then she asked how that would differ at home. It turns out that the midwives can do exactly the same thing for me at home as they would do in hospital - the only difference is that at home it would be without doctors, and in hospital there would be some around to look after me if there was a problem. If I had a heavy bleed at home, they would immediately call for an ambulance and set up an intravenous drip (which Heather confirmed with him that they'd be able to do for me at home in an emergency) to give me fluids. The ambulance crew would take over when they arrived and I would be transferred to hospital. If I was stable before the ambulance turned up, I would still need a transfer for observation and a thorough examination. The other thing the consultant said they have at the hospital that they wouldn't have at home is blood, if I should need it. I got decidedly nervous as we discussed the rest of the worst-case scenario stuff! I asked if I needed a transfer from home, what they would DO for me. He said, "They'll resuscitate you with fluids until you get to hospital and then we can give you blood." That sentence did not make me feel good! :S I am not crazy about the words "resuscitate" and "blood" in the same sentence in application to myself!
I told Heather that, to be honest, it really makes no difference to me WHERE I give birth, as far as anxiety over bleeding goes. I am just plain SCARED of bleeding heavily when the placenta is delivered, whether I'm at home or in the hospital. I don't want to bleed heavily anywhere! The consultant did also say that he would definitely like a managed 3rd stage. They pretty much would want to administer the syntometrine jab immediately that the baby was born to reduce the risk as much as possible, and I'm beginning to just think that's the best thing to do. I would like Samuel to get more blood from my placenta before the cord is cut, but I'll discuss that in more detail with him next time I see him perhaps. Even a minute is better than no time, for Samuel. So long as it doesn't put me at risk I guess.
The other possibility is that the placenta is delivered with no heavy bleed, but the lobe does not come with it all the same, and remains inside. Then I would need a transfer to hospital (if I have a homebirth) to go into theatre for a manual removal of the lobe. Which I am not excited about! So I really really really REALLY hope the whole thing just plops out and I don't bleed, and that's it and all about it! I am still not sure WHERE to give birth, and I am not keen to make the decision right now because I'm anxious, and it's not a good idea to make a decision based on anxiety. I need to PRAY about and seek the Lord - see what He wants me to do.
The consultant has booked me in for a scan at 34 weeks, a few days before Arthur's birthday, on November 4th. It's not until 4.30pm but even so, I will see the consultant right after my scan. I hope it won't be a long wait because that's a fiddly time of day with the little ones! Neil might even have a job by then and I can't fathom taking 4 little children to a maternity unit waiting room on my own at 34 weeks pregnant, being unable to "parent" them whilst being scanned, and then waiting to see the consultant and actually being able to discuss it with him once in the room, with allllll the boys there, late for their dinner, tired and cranky! :S Heather is unable to come with me as she's going to be in Norfolk on that day, and I'm sad about that, but hopefully it'll be straightforward and go okay, and I won't have too much pregnancy brain! ;)
Obviously the scan is to focus in detail on my placenta, but I know I'll get a sneak peek at my sweet tiny, and I am so excited about that!!! :D I had no idea I'd get to see him again before his arrival - what a bonus! :) Love my tiny new manny! I hope I see his dear little face. I think about his face a lot, because I remember his facial features from the last scan and I just. fell. in love. with that teeny little boy when I saw his face in grainy 3D. He's the cutest pie and I love him completely! I can't wait to meet him!
Samuel's name is still unknown to my other children. Thankfully they still haven't asked! :) I talk to him when he wiggles and call him by name when the boys aren't around, usually in the evening after they've gone to bed. He often gets called Samuel-Bamuel, or Samble when I am feeling soppy and rubbing his little feet as he pushes them out against my tummy. *sigh* I adore being pregnant. The boy is destined to have a squillion strange and soppy nicknames just like my other little ones! ;)
One of the things the consultant reminded me about was the whole position thing - that I would need to come and see him again if the baby was not in a good position for birth late in pregnancy. He said the same last time. He says it because I've had lots of babies and that means it's more likely that I could have a baby in any old position when it comes time to give birth! So I told him that Samuel was head down last week at my 28-week appointment. He started to feel low down on my tummy and into my pelvis for Samuel's head. The room went all quiet while he felt about. Bit higher? Bit higher still? He stood back and looked at my tummy, then started again up near my ribs, where I remember thinking it felt a bit tender, took a gentle hold of a sort of orange-sized part in my right side with finger and thumb, and said, "There's a head here!" :) Soooo, not head down any more then! Samuel was lying oblique with his head against my ribs right out in my side, and his bottom sat squarely on my left hip. Boy can he kick my cervix good from that position! He wasn't worried about the position, and said there was plenty of time for him to turn head down, and he'd check him next time.
Later that evening Samuel was so busy in there, and I thought maybe he'd changed position but I could still feel his head in the same place up high. Next morning (yesterday) it wasn't there! I could feel it low down with his feet kicking me in my left side when I checked my tummy. I was pretty pleased, but by the evening I couldn't find anything solid low down when I checked, just a sort of wiggly bunch of grapes, hehe! Lo and behold there was a sweet little boulder smack dab in the centre of my bump under my rib cage. Why don't I feel him swing round like that?! Seems crazy to me that he can make such big movements and I don't know about it! I did see him turn round at the 20 week scan though, and I remember it clearly because of how neatly he did it. Others of my babies have flipped with a big movement at scans and I have felt it clearly, but Samuel turned so quickly and neatly that I didn't even feel it, even though I was watching it on the screen and could feel other typical movements he was making like kicks and such. He was lying pretty spread out, and then made a quick movement, tucking himself into a ball and sort of ducking round and stretching back out again - all in one quick move without any great effort or rippling of my tummy, and yet he was flipped right round the other way once he'd done it! So maybe that's how he's wiggling about into all sorts of positions in there? He tucks and rolls! :)
Tonight while I was nursing Benjamin at bedtime, Samuel woke up (he often does as I'm doing that, which is lovely!) and started to move about, and I noticed there was a very "feety" feel to the movements up near my ribs. After Benjamin was asleep I lay down and checked his position, and he's head down again :) His head actually feels lower than I've known it before. I can't feel all of it and it doesn't move much if I gently push on one side. Funny little boy - he certainly likes to move about in there! I don't mind where he sits for now, so long as he settles on head DOWN in the last few weeks, and ideally well before then because I'm sure it's going to get increasingly uncomfy to have him turning around as he gets bigger!
He feels so BIG this week in there. I am waddling all the time now. The back of my pelvis hurts a lot when I walk and it's just so much easier to walk slowly with my legs not all that close together, lol! The less scissory movements I do with my legs the less uncomfortable it is. So I sort of stump along like a penguin around the house. I try a bit harder to look vaguely dignified if I'm out and about though! ;) The boys comment frequently now on the size of my tummy. Benjamin surprised me by lifting my top for milk the other day (I don't let him totally help himself, but if he lifts the hem of my top and says, "Gick" or "Gilk" then we know between us that he is asking me for milky :) I always oblige, but this one time as I offered him the breast, instead of joyfully latching on, he seemed to do a double-take as he leaned over my tummy and just STARED at it, haha! He started patting it and as he was getting a bit over-zealous with the patting I said, "Be gentle with Mummy's tummy - there's a baby inside!" I knew he wouldn't understand me, but he gave me a look of clear understanding, smiled, looked down at my tummy and laid his hand on it, and said, "Bah-bee!" Since then he often lifts my top to pat my tummy and say, "Bah-bee!" with enthusiasm. So sweet!! It's my very first experience like this because until now, ALL my previous youngest little ones have not been able to talk yet when I've been big and pregnant. Benjamin's younger than any of them were at this stage even, but he has tons of words and seems to understand an awful lot of things we say. Of course he has NO IDEA what it really means that there's a baby in Mummy's tummy - he will find out in December, hehe! So sweet anyway! :)
Well there's probably more to say but I think I've written enough for one entry, and it's late now so I'll go to bed! I am not being too good with my bedtimes lately, so I need to sort that out! Once the house stuff is more sorted (and it's nearly there!!!), I will breathe a huge sigh of relief. I'm just SO GLAD and thankful that all this upheaval is happening at 29 weeks and not 35 weeks - BIG difference! And that's when stuff tends to be left until, so I'm really really really glad about it happening earlier this time! There's still plenty of stuff to be done though, so I'm sure I'll still be in the thick of it at 35 weeks - hopefully not to stressy about it by then though! Once the house stuff settles down I will feel more able to get on with the next stage of preparing for Samuel's arrival - making lists of things to get sorted and so on. I am already beginning to fidget wanting to get that stuff sorted in my head and listing it and working on checking off lists, but I am not letting myself just yet. There is still too much going on with the big changes in the house, and I think it's not wise to start trying to organise a lot of other big stuff while the house stuff hasn't quite finished being sorted yet.
Anyway! Enough for tonight! I will update again soon, and try my best to remember a 30 week belly picture! :) Thanks so much for the comments, especially about the placenta issue - so interesting to read others' experiences and thoughts on the subject! xx
I'm also so excited to have actually updated within a week of my last entry, haha! ;) Yay! I put the 28 week belly picture up in the gallery tonight, but I've just realised that I MUST remember to take another one in a few days for 30 weeks! I really really want to keep up with the remaining belly pics for the rest of this pregnancy. It's all going by so fast and I want memories to LOOK at! I'm loving it so much...
Well, I have had an interesting week, pregnancy-wise! It's been a really stressy week and quite intensive physically too, given that we've moved the bedrooms round in preparation for Samuel's arrival (the boys are finally in their new bedroom and no longer sleeping on the living room floor - hoorah!), and THEN we had some sweet friends come round and help us lay laminate floor in our living room and porch! Well, I say "help" but actually Neil was in charge of occupying the boys (taking them out for a whole day by himself one of the two days it was being laid!) and I was only slightly helping with the floor, since they wouldn't let me do much because I'm pregnant! Sooooooooo sweet of them, and Neil was a wonder man with the boys. Now we have beautiful new floor and are working on getting the furniture (and contents) back to normal all over the house. We had stuff piled EVERYWHERE to get it all out of the living room for a few days. It was NO FUN but soooooo worth it, and I'm so grateful! :)
I found it really stressy having everything in upheaval in my home when I'm huge and hormonal and getting distinctly nesty. I spent a lot of time packing things in boxes and carrying SMALL (!) piles of things from bedroom to bedroom, and rebuilding the bunk beds, etc. And one evening I had bad backache and very strong Braxton Hicks contractions that started late afternoon and by the boys' bedtime I wasn't feeling very well. I felt sort of faint and queasy. I had a bath but didn't feel better, and then I just lay down in the junk room that was the boys'-bedroom-to-be (while they slept on the living room floor) and tried to relax. My Braxton Hicks ranged from bothersomely uncomfortable (distracting me from things) to painful, and they were regular, coming between 2 and 3.5 minutes apart and lasting anywhere between 45 seconds and 1.5 minutes. Not ideal! But even as I tried to relax for the entire evening, they kept on like that without stopping. By 9.45pm it had been over an hour, so I went to Contraction Master online and started to time them properly. Regular as clockwork, very close together and stronger than I'm used to as far as Braxton Hicks go. I still didn't feel well either. I wondered if it could have been down to dehydration so I started to drink water at that point. I hadn't had much to drink and I'd done lots of stuff that made me sweat a lot during the afternoon.
By 11pm I was feeling MUCH better, but the contractions were continuing to come frequently and regularly. I posted at Facebook about it and people were saying I should phone the midwife, but I was reluctant because they DID still feel like Braxton Hicks (and hadn't got stronger over the hours), albeit strong ones, and I just REALLY didn't want the midwife to say I should go into hospital to be checked at 11pm! I just wanted to go to bed, I was so tired! I happened to find an email from Heather (my doula) and replied to it, and ended up writing all about the Braxton Hicks and the way I had been feeling that evening. I knew she wouldn't get it till the next morning, but I felt better for just SAYING to someone about it and then going to bed.
I wasn't particularly bothered by Braxton Hicks during the night whenever I was up with Benjamin, and the next morning all seemed calm. Heather phoned to say that she was going to a meeting at the hospital with the Head of Midwifery and would I like her to mention my Braxton Hicks and see if she had any advice? I had some fairly strong Braxton Hicks through the day but quite far and few between really, not frequent or regular, so that was okay. Heather phoned later in the day to have a long chat. She had seen two different midwives in management at the hospital and asked each of them about my placenta (Heather is brilliant!), and also mentioned my Braxton Hicks. She said they were not concerned, though it was not normal, because it hadn't progressed into anything and had all cleared up overnight, but if it happened again before my consultant appointment on Thursday (a couple of days later) I should probably phone labour ward and perhaps go in to be checked if they suggest it, just to rule out two possible causes: UTI or constipation. I had no symptoms of a urine infection, but hmmmm, I'm nearly always constipated, pregnant or not. I just hadn't given it any thought as a cause since it's a norm for me.
That day I did much less active stuff and was more careful! But as I was putting Benjamin to bed, right on cue the Braxton Hicks began again, close together and quite strong. This time I chose to ignore them as much as I possibly could and just do my normal thing. It helped that I felt well that evening, and not yucky and weak like the evening before. I know I'm stubborn and should probably have phoned the midwife or something, but I honestly felt that it would turn out to be nothing and I did NOT want to go in for monitoring when it was 99% likely to be just that, late at night! So I ignored it, mostly! I didn't time them, but they came pretty frequently. I just relaxed and pootled about online and drank lots of water, and then went to bed when bedtime came along. Sure enough, in the night and the next day - no significant Braxton Hicks :) That day we were laying laminate floor and I constantly felt like I needed to go to the loo and felt quite uncomfy, but never really had the chance to go. By the afternoon the Braxton Hicks started up again, earlier than the previous times, and they were pretty strong by the evening. THEN I finally went for a BM and lo and behold, calm womb since then! So I guess it must have been related. The midwife said that the more babies you have, the more your uterus can become irritable. Things that can irritate it might affect it more with a 5th baby than with the 2nd, for example, so I guess it makes sense! I'm glad it has calmed down though!
The other big thing this week was my consultant appointment. Heather had spoken to a friend of hers who is a very experienced independent midwife, about my succenturiate placenta (that is, a placenta with an extra lobe in a different part of the womb, attached to the main placenta by membranes and blood vessels). She was at a homebirth a few towns away from here last Tuesday and afterwards she was talking to the two midwives there and asked them about me and my succenturiate placenta. She had also discussed it with the Head of Midwifery at the hospital and another midwife there who is pretty high up in management and very experienced. She asked all of them whether this type of placenta precludes having a homebirth. The midwives at the homebirth were from a different hospital to my local one, and were very wary of the idea of a homebirth with a succenturiate placenta. Heather asked what they considered the risks to be, and they listed all these disaster scenarios which had Heather wondering if it was really going to be a BAD idea for me to give birth anywhere except the hospital! Then she asked them how often they'd seen any of those things happen, and they said, "Oh, we've never actually SEEN it happen..." So she supposed that must mean they hadn't actually experienced a succenturiate placenta before, and at that they both said that they'd seen LOTS, but that they had no idea the women HAD a succenturiate placenta in any of the cases - they only discovered it when the placenta popped out with an extra lobe attached to it and they went, "Oooh look!" So that made Heather (and me!) feel better! ;)
The Head of Midwifery and the other "high up" (!) midwife at the hospital both said, "Absolutely not!" when Heather asked them if a succenturiate placenta precludes having a homebirth, and that was encouraging too! They said that it depends on lots of factors - where the placenta is located, where the lobe is located, how many lobes there are, how big they are, the baby's position, etc. Those would be the determining factors in whether to opt for a homebirth or hospital birth. They suggested that I might want to ask the consultant if I can have a scan later in my pregnancy to get some more information about my placenta to help assess the risks. Great idea! I've never had a late pregnancy scan before! :)
So on Thursday morning Neil and I frantically tried to corral kiddies around the task of laying the edging to the new floor (we did not pull this off!) and I ended up setting off to pick Heather up for my appointment leaving Neil with a bad headache (poor love!), 4 "battery" children (having been cooped up in only the upstairs for over 24 hours by then!), a partly finished, very dusty floor, and no furniture at all in the only room that I'd be bringing Heather back to in a couple of hours (we'd arranged a while back that she'd come home with me to see the boys, as they LOVE her and have been longing to see her, and it has been a while!)! I felt so bad leaving but I had to go to my appointment.
It being a consultant appointment, we had to wait AGES as usual, but that was fine. We chatted a lot and Heather knitted. We talked about births a lot - Heather has seen such a lot of gorgeous births, and is a brilliant advocate for change in supporting women's desires for their birth experiences. In August she and an expectant couple made history at our local hospital by having the first ever twin waterbirth in the midwife-led unit!!! Yay for Heather! :) The mother turned up 9cm dilated (having opted to labour at home as long as possible), got straight in the water, pushed out the first twin and then pushed out the second! Brilliant! :) She was 39 weeks and 2 days, and had refused to be induced when they say you have to with twins, at 38 weeks. Two perfect healthy baby girls - 6lbs 8oz and 7lbs 4oz! They went home a few hours later! Amazing, and just how it should be! :) How exciting would that have been to be present at?!?! The midwives must have been on a high for ages! :)
Anyway, I digress! We finally saw my very lovely consultant - the same one we saw last time at 18 weeks. He was very laid-back and supportive as before, and surprised us both by saying he did not feel that I HAD to have a hospital birth at all, but like the Head of Midwifery said, it would depend on many factors. I asked if I could have a scan and he immediately agreed. He said that my 20-week scan indicated that both the placenta and the lobe are high up, at the top of the uterus - my placenta on the front and the lobe on the back. This removes the main risk factor, of bleeding occuring during labour or when the waters break, since it's all up out of the way. The only risk factor he sees is the lobe not coming away and thus me having a big old haemmorrhage. He said that usually the lobe comes away. But sometimes it doesn't. Which sort of sums it up, in a nutshell! ;)
He asked if I had any questions and in my head there was this sort of chirping crickets sound as they both looked at me - my head just felt EMPTY! I had a total pregnancy brain moment! So he changed the question to, "What are your thoughts?" and again, tumbleweeds rolling... I had to admit to having no thoughts of any sort in my head at all, other than the thought of being embarrassed to be having such a brainless moment, haha! Thankfully Heather stepped in and started asking a ton of questions while I listened and took in the answers! So glad she was with me! :)
She asked what the procedure would be in hospital if I bleed, and exactly how they would treat me. Then she asked how that would differ at home. It turns out that the midwives can do exactly the same thing for me at home as they would do in hospital - the only difference is that at home it would be without doctors, and in hospital there would be some around to look after me if there was a problem. If I had a heavy bleed at home, they would immediately call for an ambulance and set up an intravenous drip (which Heather confirmed with him that they'd be able to do for me at home in an emergency) to give me fluids. The ambulance crew would take over when they arrived and I would be transferred to hospital. If I was stable before the ambulance turned up, I would still need a transfer for observation and a thorough examination. The other thing the consultant said they have at the hospital that they wouldn't have at home is blood, if I should need it. I got decidedly nervous as we discussed the rest of the worst-case scenario stuff! I asked if I needed a transfer from home, what they would DO for me. He said, "They'll resuscitate you with fluids until you get to hospital and then we can give you blood." That sentence did not make me feel good! :S I am not crazy about the words "resuscitate" and "blood" in the same sentence in application to myself!
I told Heather that, to be honest, it really makes no difference to me WHERE I give birth, as far as anxiety over bleeding goes. I am just plain SCARED of bleeding heavily when the placenta is delivered, whether I'm at home or in the hospital. I don't want to bleed heavily anywhere! The consultant did also say that he would definitely like a managed 3rd stage. They pretty much would want to administer the syntometrine jab immediately that the baby was born to reduce the risk as much as possible, and I'm beginning to just think that's the best thing to do. I would like Samuel to get more blood from my placenta before the cord is cut, but I'll discuss that in more detail with him next time I see him perhaps. Even a minute is better than no time, for Samuel. So long as it doesn't put me at risk I guess.
The other possibility is that the placenta is delivered with no heavy bleed, but the lobe does not come with it all the same, and remains inside. Then I would need a transfer to hospital (if I have a homebirth) to go into theatre for a manual removal of the lobe. Which I am not excited about! So I really really really REALLY hope the whole thing just plops out and I don't bleed, and that's it and all about it! I am still not sure WHERE to give birth, and I am not keen to make the decision right now because I'm anxious, and it's not a good idea to make a decision based on anxiety. I need to PRAY about and seek the Lord - see what He wants me to do.
The consultant has booked me in for a scan at 34 weeks, a few days before Arthur's birthday, on November 4th. It's not until 4.30pm but even so, I will see the consultant right after my scan. I hope it won't be a long wait because that's a fiddly time of day with the little ones! Neil might even have a job by then and I can't fathom taking 4 little children to a maternity unit waiting room on my own at 34 weeks pregnant, being unable to "parent" them whilst being scanned, and then waiting to see the consultant and actually being able to discuss it with him once in the room, with allllll the boys there, late for their dinner, tired and cranky! :S Heather is unable to come with me as she's going to be in Norfolk on that day, and I'm sad about that, but hopefully it'll be straightforward and go okay, and I won't have too much pregnancy brain! ;)
Obviously the scan is to focus in detail on my placenta, but I know I'll get a sneak peek at my sweet tiny, and I am so excited about that!!! :D I had no idea I'd get to see him again before his arrival - what a bonus! :) Love my tiny new manny! I hope I see his dear little face. I think about his face a lot, because I remember his facial features from the last scan and I just. fell. in love. with that teeny little boy when I saw his face in grainy 3D. He's the cutest pie and I love him completely! I can't wait to meet him!
Samuel's name is still unknown to my other children. Thankfully they still haven't asked! :) I talk to him when he wiggles and call him by name when the boys aren't around, usually in the evening after they've gone to bed. He often gets called Samuel-Bamuel, or Samble when I am feeling soppy and rubbing his little feet as he pushes them out against my tummy. *sigh* I adore being pregnant. The boy is destined to have a squillion strange and soppy nicknames just like my other little ones! ;)
One of the things the consultant reminded me about was the whole position thing - that I would need to come and see him again if the baby was not in a good position for birth late in pregnancy. He said the same last time. He says it because I've had lots of babies and that means it's more likely that I could have a baby in any old position when it comes time to give birth! So I told him that Samuel was head down last week at my 28-week appointment. He started to feel low down on my tummy and into my pelvis for Samuel's head. The room went all quiet while he felt about. Bit higher? Bit higher still? He stood back and looked at my tummy, then started again up near my ribs, where I remember thinking it felt a bit tender, took a gentle hold of a sort of orange-sized part in my right side with finger and thumb, and said, "There's a head here!" :) Soooo, not head down any more then! Samuel was lying oblique with his head against my ribs right out in my side, and his bottom sat squarely on my left hip. Boy can he kick my cervix good from that position! He wasn't worried about the position, and said there was plenty of time for him to turn head down, and he'd check him next time.
Later that evening Samuel was so busy in there, and I thought maybe he'd changed position but I could still feel his head in the same place up high. Next morning (yesterday) it wasn't there! I could feel it low down with his feet kicking me in my left side when I checked my tummy. I was pretty pleased, but by the evening I couldn't find anything solid low down when I checked, just a sort of wiggly bunch of grapes, hehe! Lo and behold there was a sweet little boulder smack dab in the centre of my bump under my rib cage. Why don't I feel him swing round like that?! Seems crazy to me that he can make such big movements and I don't know about it! I did see him turn round at the 20 week scan though, and I remember it clearly because of how neatly he did it. Others of my babies have flipped with a big movement at scans and I have felt it clearly, but Samuel turned so quickly and neatly that I didn't even feel it, even though I was watching it on the screen and could feel other typical movements he was making like kicks and such. He was lying pretty spread out, and then made a quick movement, tucking himself into a ball and sort of ducking round and stretching back out again - all in one quick move without any great effort or rippling of my tummy, and yet he was flipped right round the other way once he'd done it! So maybe that's how he's wiggling about into all sorts of positions in there? He tucks and rolls! :)
Tonight while I was nursing Benjamin at bedtime, Samuel woke up (he often does as I'm doing that, which is lovely!) and started to move about, and I noticed there was a very "feety" feel to the movements up near my ribs. After Benjamin was asleep I lay down and checked his position, and he's head down again :) His head actually feels lower than I've known it before. I can't feel all of it and it doesn't move much if I gently push on one side. Funny little boy - he certainly likes to move about in there! I don't mind where he sits for now, so long as he settles on head DOWN in the last few weeks, and ideally well before then because I'm sure it's going to get increasingly uncomfy to have him turning around as he gets bigger!
He feels so BIG this week in there. I am waddling all the time now. The back of my pelvis hurts a lot when I walk and it's just so much easier to walk slowly with my legs not all that close together, lol! The less scissory movements I do with my legs the less uncomfortable it is. So I sort of stump along like a penguin around the house. I try a bit harder to look vaguely dignified if I'm out and about though! ;) The boys comment frequently now on the size of my tummy. Benjamin surprised me by lifting my top for milk the other day (I don't let him totally help himself, but if he lifts the hem of my top and says, "Gick" or "Gilk" then we know between us that he is asking me for milky :) I always oblige, but this one time as I offered him the breast, instead of joyfully latching on, he seemed to do a double-take as he leaned over my tummy and just STARED at it, haha! He started patting it and as he was getting a bit over-zealous with the patting I said, "Be gentle with Mummy's tummy - there's a baby inside!" I knew he wouldn't understand me, but he gave me a look of clear understanding, smiled, looked down at my tummy and laid his hand on it, and said, "Bah-bee!" Since then he often lifts my top to pat my tummy and say, "Bah-bee!" with enthusiasm. So sweet!! It's my very first experience like this because until now, ALL my previous youngest little ones have not been able to talk yet when I've been big and pregnant. Benjamin's younger than any of them were at this stage even, but he has tons of words and seems to understand an awful lot of things we say. Of course he has NO IDEA what it really means that there's a baby in Mummy's tummy - he will find out in December, hehe! So sweet anyway! :)
Well there's probably more to say but I think I've written enough for one entry, and it's late now so I'll go to bed! I am not being too good with my bedtimes lately, so I need to sort that out! Once the house stuff is more sorted (and it's nearly there!!!), I will breathe a huge sigh of relief. I'm just SO GLAD and thankful that all this upheaval is happening at 29 weeks and not 35 weeks - BIG difference! And that's when stuff tends to be left until, so I'm really really really glad about it happening earlier this time! There's still plenty of stuff to be done though, so I'm sure I'll still be in the thick of it at 35 weeks - hopefully not to stressy about it by then though! Once the house stuff settles down I will feel more able to get on with the next stage of preparing for Samuel's arrival - making lists of things to get sorted and so on. I am already beginning to fidget wanting to get that stuff sorted in my head and listing it and working on checking off lists, but I am not letting myself just yet. There is still too much going on with the big changes in the house, and I think it's not wise to start trying to organise a lot of other big stuff while the house stuff hasn't quite finished being sorted yet.
Anyway! Enough for tonight! I will update again soon, and try my best to remember a 30 week belly picture! :) Thanks so much for the comments, especially about the placenta issue - so interesting to read others' experiences and thoughts on the subject! xx
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