Another fly-by post, hoping I can type at least something before Elijah wakes and I have to go, and won't have chance again today (or even tomorrow, who knows?!).
Elijah will be 7 weeks old the day after tomorrow. It's going fast, but it's kind of hard-going, and I have to take each day at a time. I am (honestly) doing so cheerfully, and it is working out okay, but I am getting tired now, and starting to feel a bit wistful for things to settle down and to be able to get the focus back on my other children and the house (and homeschooling!) that I had before he was born. I understand why I can't, and I'm doing the best I can, and I'm okay with it all. I am not stressing out about it. Just making note here that I'm lately feeling a bit drained and looking forward to more settled days ahead, whenever that happens (I'm not sure when to expect change yet. Perhaps not for a while?).
Elijah has been on his medication for reflux for 2 weeks tomorrow, and it has also been almost two weeks since I cut out dairy. I didn't go crazy reading labels for ingredients that come from milk at first, but decided to after reading other people's stories of how their babies responded to even tiny amounts in foods, etc. So I think I can say I have been completely dairy-free for maybe 10 days? I am not sure. Maybe a few days less. Anyway. I miss milk and cheese, and it's proving really hard to find a variety of foods that I can eat which are nutritious enough AND accessible enough, AND quick enough to cook, AND easy enough to cook, for me to be able to actually consider them. Not proving easy at all. But oh well! It's worth it if it helps my little one.
He is starting to be more calm these last few days. He is having longer periods of calm alertness, and since maybe the day before yesterday he has surprised me by sitting in the bouncy chair for maybe 5 or 10 minutes in a row without crying! That is AMAZING for Elijah, believe me. He otherwise cries all the time. ALL of it. Or sleeps, or feeds. Otherwise he is crying. Lately not quite so much! :) He is cooing and smiling at us a lot, and even at the boys a bit today and yesterday. He had his third osteopath appointment this morning and smiled and cooed and generally flirted with the osteopath, which was sweet - and a big eye-opener for her to see how much he has changed since the first appt (screaming and rigid and distressed for 2 hours).
Aaaargh my laptop battery is about to die and I left the power cable next to the bed where Elijah is sleeping! It's late so maybe it's not a good idea to try getting it in case I wake him and then start a whole cry cycle again before I get chance to go to bed.... I think I will post this now, unfinished as it is, and update again tomorrow with the rest, if I get chance! Back soon! :)
Well, I did post it, but it's now 20 mins before Elijah's midnight meds are due and I'm all ready for bed, sitting in a dark bedroom next to a sleeping baby, having drawn up his syringe-ful of yucky bitter stuff by the light of the laptop monitor (now plugged in!). He's still sleeping, so I think I will carry on updating the original post unless he stirs, or midnight arrives! ;)
Elijah had his 6-8 week check with the doctor on Wednesday. I was supposed to have my postnatal check the same day, but I wrote down 2.20pm (his appt was sent to me in the post for 2pm) for some reason, and when I turned up for both our appointments, they said it was 9.20am and I'd missed it! :S Whoops! Not sure what part of my brain wasn't there at the time of making the appointment, but oh well. The doctor was very nice about it (same one who had me in tears over being 5 mins late with Benjamin's 6-8 week check - perhaps she'd learned her lesson, not to make this particular mother upset postnatally, lol!) and I rebooked for next Friday at 10.30 with a different doctor (since that's all they could offer me), but I think I will end up cancelling that one because Elijah's next osteopath appt is sure to clash with it. I don't know when that is yet because the osteopath he sees was fully booked for Friday, but he NEEDS to be seen weekly, so he is on a waiting list for cancellations. If there isn't one, she said she would double book him with someone else just to be sure he gets a treatment :) The beautiful thing about this place is that it's FREE. They are a registered charity (The Osteopathic Centre for Children, in London) and encourage donations by families being treated there, so I donate sometimes after an appointment. We can't afford osteopathic treatment in any other setting, so I'm ever so thankful for the OCC! :) Anyway, who knows when I'll get my 6 week postnatal check! Probably sometime, eventually! I have no concerns about me anyway.
I have pelvic pain and back pain still, to varying degrees, depending on my activity level. I saw my physiotherapist at the hospital on Thursday last week, and was given a ton of very very very simple and careful exercises to do, which I am getting precisely NO time to do so far. I have to go back at the beginning of August, because there are some of the very very very simple and careful exercises that I am still unable to do without pain, so I have to wait on those and go back to see how I'm doing. I am so frustrated because for once I desperately feel the need to be getting fit and exercising properly, but the physio told me absolutely NO exercising whatsoever. Only gentle walks (an impossible activity with any of my children in tow, let alone all of them!) or the exercises prescribed. I have been doing a bit more walking lately, just getting from the car (parked a few mins away) to an appointment or something, which sounds laughably puny but is actually quite a bit of exercise for me, embarrassingly! :/ On Monday it was Benjamin's 3rd birthday (!!!) and we all went out to find a good place to run about (the boys, not me!) and jump in huge puddles, as that's what Benjamin wanted to do in the end on that rainy birthday! So I walked quite a bit further than my body said I ought to, and with Elijah on my front in the hug-a-bub. It was okay walking with him in there - he slept pretty quickly and stayed asleep until I put him in the car seat to go home - but my back did ache after 10 minutes or so. Oh well. Anyway, I hurt like crazy the next day in my feet and ankles and hips! Soooo unfit. *sigh* I so want to get stuck into toning up and increasing my stamina, and aerobic exercise for my heart and lungs, but I'm not allowed to yet. It's going to be a slow gradual process to just get my core muscles and ligaments accepting of basic exercises, which is really frustrating, but a worthwhile process I'm sure. I want to be in much better shape before my next pregnancy (which I hope will happen!) :)
Elijah's appointment with the doctor went quite well. He weighs 9lbs 5oz, which puts him at the 10th percentile for weight (9th on the charts they go by, 10th in the breastfed baby charts), which is the curve he's been on since birth. He did go up nearly to the 25th percentile last time he was weighed by the health visitor, so the doctor sees this weigh-in to show a "dip" in weight gain. *sigh* He is a tall boy! He was never measured at birth but I always felt he was longer than average because despite being really skinny and his clothes being baggy on him, he was always outgrowing the length of the footed sleepsuits, and the sleepsuits without feet were like shorts, halfway up his legs, hehe! Anyway he is 59cm long (23 inches) which puts him between the 75th and 91st percentiles (80th percentile on the breastfed baby charts). The doctor got kind of concerned about the difference between his height and weight percentiles, and suggested I topped him up with formula. I didn't expect that. She said she didn't really believe he has reflux and that he cries a lot and feeds a lot (2-3 hourly or more frequently, but very randomly around the clock because I feed him on demand) because he's a "hungry baby". And that's he a hungry baby because he needs "more" than my milk is giving him. *another sigh* That was a bit of a low moment, to be honest. A mummy doesn't feel good to hear things like that, even if it's cheerfully suggested and meant to be helpful or lighthearted, which it was, and I love my GP. But I do not want to supplement with formula, and don't believe it's the best or right thing for him. I am sure there is no reason why my milk can't be enough for him. I have a huge supply, as always. I am breastfeeding Benjamin maybe twice a day, Samuel whenver he wants it during the day (4+ times maybe?), and Elijah day and night pretty frequently, and still leaking loads between anyone's feeds when my milk randomly lets down. Everyone gets what they want when they feed and stop when they are full, and I can hand express more right afterwards. So it's not a supply thing. I don't think there is really anything wrong with his feeding pattern, nor that he's a "hungry baby". On the day of the appointment I really felt kind of knocked, confidence-wise, by the whole thing, and was second-guessing my gut instinct (which is to breastfeed, not supplement, and not introduce solids early (ie. before 6 months)). But I've had some good encouragement and support from friends online and people in the know, and feel much more confident that my gut instinct is right now.
I am perfectly happy to feed him all the time! I know he doesn't need to be feeding TOO frequently because that can aggravate reflux (in fact the whole feeding frequently thing IS a symptom of reflux, tsk!), so I need to talk to Heather about it as she's a breastfeeding counsellor. She is away on holiday until Sunday so I'll have to wait until then. Anyway, he is feeding well, and growing, so I am not worried. The GP prescribed him formula for babies who are allergic to cows milk protein, and more of his reflux meds, but I only collected the reflux meds.
Anyway, he is otherwise doing fine. His neck muscles are stronger than she expected, and he holds his head up well and can turn his head from side to side when lying on his tummy. He is starting to track objects with his eyes, and does lots of "conversing" now which is ever so sweet! I love hearing his voice! :)
I am still spotting from the birth. It's not that unusual for me to still have a trace of lochia at 6 weeks postpartum, but it should be disappearing soon, and I'll be glad! I don't much like that stage! I am suspicious that some sort of hormonal change is going on for me right now. On Wednesday (the day before yesterday), I felt tired and sensitive, and kind of moody. I thought nothing of it, since I'm at full stretch emotionally and physically all the time at the moment, and sleep deprived to boot! ;) I also noticed IBS that day, which I haven't had since I was pregnant. Again, thought nothing much of it. Then the next day, yesterday, I noticed I felt kind of hormonal and weepy and tired, in the same way as the day before. I think I only really took note of it because it was the second day running and I hadn't noticed any feelings like that since the initial few days after the birth with the hormones settling down. Neil and I argued that evening over something sooooo daft, and I put it down to tiredness for us both, but the next morning I thought about it and realised that I was being much more oversensitive and quick to lose my temper than is normal for me, even when just tired. Then yesterday, I went to the loo and what do you know?! EWCM! And not a small amount either. That's the first CM I've had since pregnancy. I generally do not have any after having a baby until my cycles are starting to gear up for coming back, or at least try to (even if they don't succeed at first, lol!). I had felt a bit crampy for the previous few days and it distracted me enough to make me wonder what it was about. When I started getting IBS on Wednesday I thought maybe that's all it had been, but I wasn't convinced because it didn't really feel like it. I haven't ruled out a urine infection but I have no other symptoms of one. Anyway, I'm now on day 2 of EWCM, and have been quite uncomfy on my left side today low down at the front, so I wonder if my body is trying to ovulate. I know that is CRAZY! I am breastfeeding 3 "babies" and just gave birth 6 weeks ago, lol! But my periods seem to be starting again earlier and earlier each time for me now, and the last time I had a period at 8 weeks postpartum, with ovulation too! So it's possible. I kind of hope not, for now! It's perfectly normal to have EWCM in random patches for months without ovulating or having a period, when you're breastfeeding, apparently. But it hasn't been MY norm, so far. We shall see.
Well, I think that is about all I wanted to catch up on for now. I'm sure I have more to waffle about, like how I genuinely felt really wistful and longing when I was driving Elijah to his appointment this morning and playing a worship CD that I listened to every time I drove to an antenatal appointment, and haven't heard since. Ohhhh how I missed being pregnant at that moment! I mean, I generally miss being pregnant and look forward to doing it again, but with the memory trigger of the music, I actually felt such a physical pang! I am going to be just hopeless when my baby-making days are over. I am already praying over it, because I know it will be an adjustment and I want to make it sanely and smoothly! ;) I trust God. He's in control and He knows what is best for me, so if I can rest in that, I should be okay, but I suuuuure will miss it!
It's just past midnight now and Elijah is STILL sleeping (since maybe 8.45pm!) so I need to wake him up for his medication now. I much prefer giving him his dose this way, because he doesn't really wake up. I pick him up and cradle him in my left arm, semi-upright, and then tease his lips with the syringe until he stirs and opens his mouth. His dose is only 0.33mls of nasty bitter liquid (yes, I did taste it), but I still only give him about a quarter of that dose at a time, rubbing his tiny cheeks to rouse him enough to make him swallow each little bit. I don't want him to choke! He takes the whole dose safely that way, and doesn't actually wake up or know he's even taking the yucky stuff, which is much nicer for him. He is such a trooper taking it when he's wide awake and hungry though. He grimaces a little, but calmly takes it all the same, and never tries to avoid it or turn his face away. He doesn't cry about it. He's such a good boy, and I love him so much! Anyway it's nice at night because he takes the dose without knowing, and then I lay him back down once I'm sure he's squidged his mouth about and swallowed a few times, and he generally stays asleep for a while longer before waking as usual for a feed. He feeds maybe every 3-4 hours at night, but one night after his 2nd osteo appointment a week ago, he slept from about midnight (having cried all evening which he usually does - this evening is unusual in that he has slept for most of it!) until 6am!!!! Now, there's no sense getting too excited about him "sleeping through the night" because looking back I see that many of my babies have done just that for One Night Only at the very same age. Then never again until like 18 months old, haha! Anyway it was nice! :)
Okay, off to medicate my darling boy. I will be back soon! I should be making this the last blog entry here for a while, because I like to close up shop here once the official postnatal/newborn period is over, until next time. And I usually go with the postnatal appointments for that marker, and we've done that. But Elijah is having prolonged newborn-ish issues still, and I haven't had my postnatal check yet, and anyway I am having ongoing treatment for pregnancy-related stuff with the physio, sooooo.... maybe I will keep it open a while longer. I also like to come back to keep track of my cycles once they start up again, and if that's going to happen soon anyway... I will not say goodbye for now. I'll come back and update again sometime soon, to keep a record of how Elijah is doing with his treatment. I think I will want that to look back on for future reference maybe. If you're still keeping up, well done, lol! I haven't got many commenters or readers on any of the posts I make here or at my main blog now, but I am much more settled now than I've ever been before with the idea of just blogging for my own memories and future reference stuff, so I am not put off. I like readers and commentors though, of course! ;) I will be back soon!
Showing posts with label Baby #6. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Baby #6. Show all posts
Friday, July 13, 2012
Sunday, June 10, 2012
Elijah's newborn photos!
Paul came round with Elijah's newborn photos this evening, yay! I am so tired out and haven't got time to write anything but I wanted to post them here straight away, and I'll try to write an update soon. For more about the photo session, go to the previous entry which I posted last night. :)
These are my photos, but taken by Paul, and I think they are copyrighted to him, so please don't copy these photos without my permission (Nicola, permission granted! ;) ). Thanks!
Here's my sweet little manny! I love him sooooo!
These are my photos, but taken by Paul, and I think they are copyrighted to him, so please don't copy these photos without my permission (Nicola, permission granted! ;) ). Thanks!
Here's my sweet little manny! I love him sooooo!
Saturday, June 9, 2012
Photo session (8 days old) and poo!
Whoops. Somehow a week has passed since I last updated! :S That's a LONG time in Newborn Land! Elijah is sleeping next to me but he is likely to wake at any moment for a feed, so I may only have seconds to try and cram a whole week of news in before he wakes!
Elijah had his photos taken at 8 days old, on Monday this past week. It went really well! Our friend Paul from church is a keen photographer - he doesn't earn a living from it but he does "professional" shoots. He has never done newborn photography before and wanted to bless us with some photos, and have some fun - he led me to believe he needed to build up a portfolio, but it turns out he pretty much just thought it would be a fun new experience and that we would like to have special photos of our tiny manny! How lovely! :)
He picked Elijah and I up at 9ish in the morning and we knew it would take all morning to do, going at Elijah's pace and seeing how we got on. Elijah HATED his first experience in a car seat, poor baby! He screamed frantically until we got to a road with speed bumps and then he suddenly fell fast asleep practically mid-scream! ;) He stayed asleep for the first half hour we were there, and woke as I was taking his clothes off ready for the first photo. So I fed him and he went to sleep, and since he was already a nakey baby, we put him straight into position for a photo right from the breast. The very first thing he did when positioned on the towels was a wee, hehe! Thankfully he was on his tummy so it wasn't a big deal. He did great. Pretty much every time we tried a new pose or brought a prop into the shot, he started squirming and fussing until he was awake and displeased! ;) So I did a lot of breastfeeding over the morning and consequently Elijah did a lot weeing on whatever he was laid on, lol! I was so nervous after a couple of hours that he would poo, because he pretty much doesn't go longer than a few hours between poos - well, he's going a bit longer than that at the moment but at the beginning of the week he was pooing about every 2-3 hours, if not more frequently. Oh how funny, as I typed that he squirmed in his sleep and emitted a squirty sound from his bottom, hehehe! Guess I'll be changing that in a mo! ;)
Anyway, thankfully (amazingly!) he didn't poo at all while we were there, but the momemt I got him out of his car seat when we arrived home, he did a mega blow-out (out of the sides and back of the nappy - his first!). I was so glad he didn't do that during the photo shoot!
Some of the poses were soooo sweet to put him into, because awwww he's so buttery soft and foldable, and being fast asleep at the same time was just adorable to watch. Paul's 16-year-old daughter was helping us, and she would keep saying, "Awwwww!!!" when Elijah was put into a new pose! Ohhh, more squirty sounds from the sleeping boy... :S Hope it won't be a blow-out. Those are no fun to change!
I think we got various photos taken of only 4 or 5 different poses, but it took until about 1.30pm! I was soooo tired suddenly when I sat down to feed him at that point, I felt a bit unwell with it really, all of a sudden. There were more ideas that Paul had for photos, but they had a Jubilee gathering to attend in the afternoon in any case, and we were happy with what we'd got already. Paul has to edit the photos but he works full time. He thought maybe he might be able to get a disc of photos to me this weekend but I know this weekend has a ton of social events that he's running/part of at church, so I am not sure if he'll actually have time.
MORE squirty sounds! Yikes. He's still sleeping but he'll wake when he's finished, I should think. Then I won't have chance to type any more tonight, for sure, so perhaps I'll post this? Mind you I haven't written much yet, so maybe I'll save it and finish it tomorrow or something? Hmmm...
There's a photo that I really hope comes out okay - Paul happened to have a basket with a Union Jack flag pattern all over it, and he wondered about using it to put Elijah in, since it was the Queen's Jubilee weekend (I'm one who LOVES all things royal and the Jubilee, by the way!), and I loved the idea!! So we got a photo of him in there. I hope it comes out well! Can't wait to see what he's captured, and post them online!
Yet more squirty sounds. This is shaping up to be a blow-out nappy for sure.
So Paul drove us home, and Elijah didn't fall asleep this time, he was just mightily cross with the journey and the indignity of being squished into a car seat! ;) When I lifted his car seat out of Paul's car and he drove off, one of the neighbours was coming out to her car. She looked kind of shocked, and said, "Another one?! How many's that now?!" I don't think she knew I was even pregnant so I can understand her reaction! ;) I said, "Six..." and she said, "Aw my gawd!" and came over to look at him in his car seat (crying angrily!). She asked if we were just trying to get a girl, and I said no, just a baby, and that I loved having babies (this is now my default answer, as I'm getting used to saying it a lot now!).
Okay, he's awake, so I'll have to finish this another time!
Well, the poo stayed contained, but he made up for it by weeing in his own face while I changed his nappy, lol! Poor baby!
After we got home, I was so tired and hungry, and it was after 2pm! I grabbed a few things to eat from the kitchen and took them upstairs with Elijah. I ate while I breastfed my Very Fed-Up Baby (he did not enjoy the travelling aspect!) and then he was exhausted, so we went to bed. I think I was asleep with him by 2.30pm, and the boys and Neil were out at Box Hill all day with Uncle Ian, so it was a quiet house. I kept waking up to feed Elijah when he stirred, and sometimes checked the time, but I still felt soooo tired! I ended up waking up properly when the phone rang next to me, and it was Neil saying he knew it was a bit late, but they were about to set off for home, so it would be near 8pm when they got back. I thought, "What?!?!" and was amazed to see that it was after 7pm already when I looked at the clock! I guess the morning had been more than I was quite ready for, and it really tired me out. I had some pain in my left breast that day too, and the day before, and I ended up with a fever and much worse pain when I woke the next morning, so maybe that's partly why I'd needed to sleep like that when we got home?
Anyway I will have to write about the "almost mastitis" episode another time, because it's late, Elijah is fussing and I need to go to bed! I'll post this for now and try again tomorrow - Elijah is two weeks old tomorrow!!! I cannot believe how fast it's going!
Elijah had his photos taken at 8 days old, on Monday this past week. It went really well! Our friend Paul from church is a keen photographer - he doesn't earn a living from it but he does "professional" shoots. He has never done newborn photography before and wanted to bless us with some photos, and have some fun - he led me to believe he needed to build up a portfolio, but it turns out he pretty much just thought it would be a fun new experience and that we would like to have special photos of our tiny manny! How lovely! :)
He picked Elijah and I up at 9ish in the morning and we knew it would take all morning to do, going at Elijah's pace and seeing how we got on. Elijah HATED his first experience in a car seat, poor baby! He screamed frantically until we got to a road with speed bumps and then he suddenly fell fast asleep practically mid-scream! ;) He stayed asleep for the first half hour we were there, and woke as I was taking his clothes off ready for the first photo. So I fed him and he went to sleep, and since he was already a nakey baby, we put him straight into position for a photo right from the breast. The very first thing he did when positioned on the towels was a wee, hehe! Thankfully he was on his tummy so it wasn't a big deal. He did great. Pretty much every time we tried a new pose or brought a prop into the shot, he started squirming and fussing until he was awake and displeased! ;) So I did a lot of breastfeeding over the morning and consequently Elijah did a lot weeing on whatever he was laid on, lol! I was so nervous after a couple of hours that he would poo, because he pretty much doesn't go longer than a few hours between poos - well, he's going a bit longer than that at the moment but at the beginning of the week he was pooing about every 2-3 hours, if not more frequently. Oh how funny, as I typed that he squirmed in his sleep and emitted a squirty sound from his bottom, hehehe! Guess I'll be changing that in a mo! ;)
Anyway, thankfully (amazingly!) he didn't poo at all while we were there, but the momemt I got him out of his car seat when we arrived home, he did a mega blow-out (out of the sides and back of the nappy - his first!). I was so glad he didn't do that during the photo shoot!
Some of the poses were soooo sweet to put him into, because awwww he's so buttery soft and foldable, and being fast asleep at the same time was just adorable to watch. Paul's 16-year-old daughter was helping us, and she would keep saying, "Awwwww!!!" when Elijah was put into a new pose! Ohhh, more squirty sounds from the sleeping boy... :S Hope it won't be a blow-out. Those are no fun to change!
I think we got various photos taken of only 4 or 5 different poses, but it took until about 1.30pm! I was soooo tired suddenly when I sat down to feed him at that point, I felt a bit unwell with it really, all of a sudden. There were more ideas that Paul had for photos, but they had a Jubilee gathering to attend in the afternoon in any case, and we were happy with what we'd got already. Paul has to edit the photos but he works full time. He thought maybe he might be able to get a disc of photos to me this weekend but I know this weekend has a ton of social events that he's running/part of at church, so I am not sure if he'll actually have time.
MORE squirty sounds! Yikes. He's still sleeping but he'll wake when he's finished, I should think. Then I won't have chance to type any more tonight, for sure, so perhaps I'll post this? Mind you I haven't written much yet, so maybe I'll save it and finish it tomorrow or something? Hmmm...
There's a photo that I really hope comes out okay - Paul happened to have a basket with a Union Jack flag pattern all over it, and he wondered about using it to put Elijah in, since it was the Queen's Jubilee weekend (I'm one who LOVES all things royal and the Jubilee, by the way!), and I loved the idea!! So we got a photo of him in there. I hope it comes out well! Can't wait to see what he's captured, and post them online!
Yet more squirty sounds. This is shaping up to be a blow-out nappy for sure.
So Paul drove us home, and Elijah didn't fall asleep this time, he was just mightily cross with the journey and the indignity of being squished into a car seat! ;) When I lifted his car seat out of Paul's car and he drove off, one of the neighbours was coming out to her car. She looked kind of shocked, and said, "Another one?! How many's that now?!" I don't think she knew I was even pregnant so I can understand her reaction! ;) I said, "Six..." and she said, "Aw my gawd!" and came over to look at him in his car seat (crying angrily!). She asked if we were just trying to get a girl, and I said no, just a baby, and that I loved having babies (this is now my default answer, as I'm getting used to saying it a lot now!).
Okay, he's awake, so I'll have to finish this another time!
Well, the poo stayed contained, but he made up for it by weeing in his own face while I changed his nappy, lol! Poor baby!
After we got home, I was so tired and hungry, and it was after 2pm! I grabbed a few things to eat from the kitchen and took them upstairs with Elijah. I ate while I breastfed my Very Fed-Up Baby (he did not enjoy the travelling aspect!) and then he was exhausted, so we went to bed. I think I was asleep with him by 2.30pm, and the boys and Neil were out at Box Hill all day with Uncle Ian, so it was a quiet house. I kept waking up to feed Elijah when he stirred, and sometimes checked the time, but I still felt soooo tired! I ended up waking up properly when the phone rang next to me, and it was Neil saying he knew it was a bit late, but they were about to set off for home, so it would be near 8pm when they got back. I thought, "What?!?!" and was amazed to see that it was after 7pm already when I looked at the clock! I guess the morning had been more than I was quite ready for, and it really tired me out. I had some pain in my left breast that day too, and the day before, and I ended up with a fever and much worse pain when I woke the next morning, so maybe that's partly why I'd needed to sleep like that when we got home?
Anyway I will have to write about the "almost mastitis" episode another time, because it's late, Elijah is fussing and I need to go to bed! I'll post this for now and try again tomorrow - Elijah is two weeks old tomorrow!!! I cannot believe how fast it's going!
Sunday, May 27, 2012
He's here!
Elijah Douglas has arrived! :)
Little pickle continued his pattern of unpredictability, and contractions started regularly and painfully literally minutes before we left for the hospital! We waited an hour to see if they'd pick up, so that when we went into hospital we would not need the IV induction (always better natural, as the midwives have kept telling me). After an hour things were definitely hotting up, and I decided to stay and have my baby at home, since I usually labour fairly quickly now.
I was in established labour probably from 11.30am, which the midwives took from Heather's observations - she felt that the contractions became more serious "active labour" from that point (first contraction was 9.30am ish while breastfeeding Samuel to sleep for his nap, right before "going"). At first the contractions were just low soreness and very short (30 seconds maybe) but I was having about 2 or 3 of them in each 10 minute period, so they were pretty regular. I didn't have to breathe through them and I was a bit worried it would all go away! But they got stronger quickly, though not much longer. The crampy pain stayed between contractions within the first hour and it was hard to move or walk about without loads of pain, so I tried to stay still. Heather did have me sit on the birth ball for a while to really do everything I could to get things established. When it looked like things WERE, we called Jackie, and she CAME OVER!!! :) The head of community midwives! She was my main midwife and delivered Elijah, and was WONDERFUL. I couldn't have had a more experienced, knowledgeable, fantastic midwife, and I'm so thrilled and grateful. The second midwive, Karen, was someone I hadn't met before but she was lovely too.
Elijah was born after about 3 hours of established labour, at 2.20pm. Oh my WORD transition and pushing him out was hooooorrrrrrible, hehe! I always say that, because it always is! But so worth it! I had a better time of it this time, mentally, because I felt really familiar with my pattern of labour and could really see the same pattern progressing, which helped me feel more grounded when the pain became unbearable. I used no pain relief, just breathing, and holding Heather's hand.
I really did PUSH him out! I don't often do that with my babies, hehe! I had an urge to push and went with it, and if I got the feeling that I was going to lose it mid-push and start making a ton of noise, I stopped pushing and blew blew blew through the rest of the contraction for all I was worth. I gave birth lying on my right side facing the edge of the bed (facing Heather), and that's where I mostly laboured too. When I could feel his head moving down a bit during transitional contractions, I told them so, and Jackie looked but couldn't see anything. She asked if I could lift my top leg but I said I couldn't, and so Heather lifted it just as a contraction was starting, I had no choice but to push with the feeling, and his head was born very quickly from nowhere! I did make some noise when the head was crowning but not the loud wailing I've made in the past - more just a lower "aaaaaarrrrghhhh", lol! And I rolled my face forwards into the pillow to a) cope with the sensation, and b) stifle the noise for the boys downstairs. I had a clear ring of fire sensation this time, and his head really POPPED out right afterwards. I knew what that meant and I was so relieved! The contraction was already finishing, but the sensation of his body in there was so uncomfortable, so I kept blowing through that feeling until the next contraction came, which was pretty fast. I knew that would be probably the most uncomfortable part (shoulders rotating and birthing always are for me, and that is also when I tear each time), so when the contraction came I pushed but blew once I reached the point of wanting to shout about it, and just tried to let him come at his own speed (which was very fast but felt like a long and dreadful sensation all the same!). In my mind I was frantically saying to myself, "He's here, he's here, this part means he's here, let him come, let him come!" to try and ride out the moment until it was over. I knew it wouldn't take long, but I just needed something to cope with the awfulness of it!
And then it WAS over! :) Oh the relief and the absolute joy, looking down and reaching for him as they passed this TEENY little person up between my legs and onto my tummy. He was fairly quiet at first but soon became very agitated and cried quite a lot for a long time, even with snuggles and lots of love on my tummy/chest! He pinked up almost immediately.
Elijah had a true knot in his cord!!! How incredibly scary, if I had known that while still pregnant, and how thankful I am to God for sparing his life. Jackie said she rarely sees a true knot, and she's surprised his heartrate was so good all the way through labour right to the very point of birth! I asked if it could account for his slower growth, but she didn't think so particularly. He's very healthy and his cord was pulsating well still. At the scans, they had done dopplers on his umbilical cord several times to check the resistance of the flow, and it was normal and fine. I took a photo of the cord and placenta, which I could post but it's pretty gory! ;) I will if you want me to though! :)
His placenta took AGES to come out! Aaaages. I had a natural third stage as I had wanted, though they were ready to the syntometrine injection because it really wasn't coming out. I kept having contractions and it still didn't appear, and Elijah had a nice long feed but still nothing! Eventually they had me get out of bed and sit on a potty on the chair to see if gravity helped, but it didn't, and I became very tired being upright and didn't feel nice after a while, so they put me back to bed.
Eventually I wondered about the whole pregnancy/pre-labour thing being SO very contrary! No matter what decision I made, at that point something would change and I would have to do the opposite thing, and then when I thought that was going ahead, something would change again, hehe! So I said this to the midwives, and then said, "I'm saying out loud (looking sternly at my baggy tummy and directing my words in its general direction!), "I'm going to have the syntometrine injection now"!!" and then I literally immediately had a contraction and pushed, and out came my placenta in one go, all intact, lol! It was so funny because of how no matter what I've said over the past 4 days, the opposite has then occurred, and it happened just the same for the placenta in such a funny way! ;) I think it was over an hour or 90 minutes waiting for it, up to that point! They let me go longer than they usually would, just to try and keep it all as natural as possible.
They couldn't 100% confirm that all the membranes were out, because there were some ragged parts, but they told me that my body will work any little bits out, and I need to call them if I have large clots or heavy bleeding, so they can check me out.
I felt kind of feverish the last hour or two of my labour, and I took my temperature (as I had been doing 4-hourly) a couple of hours before the end, but it was normal. I figured I just felt hot because it was a REALLY hot day in a south-facing bedroom, and I was labouring. When Elijah was born and they took his temperature, it was up a little, and my heart sank. It was 37.6, so they uncovered him (he was skin-to-skin at the time, but covered with a towel for warmth) and his temp came down to normal really quick. All his other obs were fine. I wanted to take my own temperature because I did feel a bit too hot, not-right hot, you know? Eventually after the placenta palava, they did my obs and my temperature was almost the same as Elijah's had been - 37.5. I was worried it was a sign of infection, after how long my waters were broken, but they said to take some paracetamol and they would take it again before they left. It came down to almost normal, and has been back up to 37.2 (barely a raised temp at all) once the paracetamol wore off, but I've taken some more now. They said they aren't concerned about my temp, and that once the day's heat cools off and I get some rest, if it's spiking up then I need to call them and they will check me and provide me with antibiotics in case of infection, if that's the case. Otherwise they'd expect it to stay low or non-existant. An infection would make it spike higher, or produce other symptoms along with a fever eventually, so I am just keeping an eye on myself really.
I have felt remarkably well since giving birth! Probably the most well I've ever felt after birth, which is lovely! I didn't feel weak and wobbly at all after the first hour or two, and usually that doesn't happen for the first 24 hours or so. I have been able to get up and go to the loo without shuffling along feeling weak and dreadful, verrrry slowly! ;) Also, I did not need any stitches this time!!!!! :D My very first time ever not having stitches! Jackie found that I did have a tear, but it was so small. She said that she could put a couple of stitches in for me, but it wasn't bleeding at all so she felt it would be fine to just leave it to heal, if I wanted. And I DID want! ;) Stitches are no fun!
I am not feeling any soreness at all from my perineum, and weeing stings a little bit but it's perfectly bearable. My blood loss is normal at the moment and I am not having a horrible time at all with after pains - maybe the paracetamol is helping there though?
Elijah is breastfeeding well, and sleeping sooooo cutely in between. He did a huuuuuge meconium poo all over my tummy within minutes of birth, and the little waters that were left to go pop as his head was born had some meconium in them, but not much. He has done a huge meconium poo in his first nappy so far, but I am not sure if he's weed yet. I am doing his observations 2-hourly around the clock - temperature, respirations, heart rate, etc. I use my stethoscope for his heart rate. Everything is normal so far, except that last time I took his temp it was a bit too low, so I've put him in a sleepsuit instead of a vest (it's so hot, and he's on my body most of the time so I'd thought a vest was enough). Hopefully his temp has come up now. It's time to do his next set of obs so I must go.
Here are a few photos of the big boys meeting their new baby brother for the first time, about 2 hours after he was born, and then one of him finally dressed in something at about 4 hours old. He's so delightfully gorgeous and tiny (oh I almost forgot! He weighed in at 6lbs 8oz, sweet little manny!) and I think he looks most like newborn Nathan, but he's very much his own little person with his own look. ALL the boys are ecstatic about him, and Samuel is very relaxed and smiley around him too.
Thank you for praying and commenting! I really appreciate it! :)
Little pickle continued his pattern of unpredictability, and contractions started regularly and painfully literally minutes before we left for the hospital! We waited an hour to see if they'd pick up, so that when we went into hospital we would not need the IV induction (always better natural, as the midwives have kept telling me). After an hour things were definitely hotting up, and I decided to stay and have my baby at home, since I usually labour fairly quickly now.
I was in established labour probably from 11.30am, which the midwives took from Heather's observations - she felt that the contractions became more serious "active labour" from that point (first contraction was 9.30am ish while breastfeeding Samuel to sleep for his nap, right before "going"). At first the contractions were just low soreness and very short (30 seconds maybe) but I was having about 2 or 3 of them in each 10 minute period, so they were pretty regular. I didn't have to breathe through them and I was a bit worried it would all go away! But they got stronger quickly, though not much longer. The crampy pain stayed between contractions within the first hour and it was hard to move or walk about without loads of pain, so I tried to stay still. Heather did have me sit on the birth ball for a while to really do everything I could to get things established. When it looked like things WERE, we called Jackie, and she CAME OVER!!! :) The head of community midwives! She was my main midwife and delivered Elijah, and was WONDERFUL. I couldn't have had a more experienced, knowledgeable, fantastic midwife, and I'm so thrilled and grateful. The second midwive, Karen, was someone I hadn't met before but she was lovely too.
Elijah was born after about 3 hours of established labour, at 2.20pm. Oh my WORD transition and pushing him out was hooooorrrrrrible, hehe! I always say that, because it always is! But so worth it! I had a better time of it this time, mentally, because I felt really familiar with my pattern of labour and could really see the same pattern progressing, which helped me feel more grounded when the pain became unbearable. I used no pain relief, just breathing, and holding Heather's hand.
I really did PUSH him out! I don't often do that with my babies, hehe! I had an urge to push and went with it, and if I got the feeling that I was going to lose it mid-push and start making a ton of noise, I stopped pushing and blew blew blew through the rest of the contraction for all I was worth. I gave birth lying on my right side facing the edge of the bed (facing Heather), and that's where I mostly laboured too. When I could feel his head moving down a bit during transitional contractions, I told them so, and Jackie looked but couldn't see anything. She asked if I could lift my top leg but I said I couldn't, and so Heather lifted it just as a contraction was starting, I had no choice but to push with the feeling, and his head was born very quickly from nowhere! I did make some noise when the head was crowning but not the loud wailing I've made in the past - more just a lower "aaaaaarrrrghhhh", lol! And I rolled my face forwards into the pillow to a) cope with the sensation, and b) stifle the noise for the boys downstairs. I had a clear ring of fire sensation this time, and his head really POPPED out right afterwards. I knew what that meant and I was so relieved! The contraction was already finishing, but the sensation of his body in there was so uncomfortable, so I kept blowing through that feeling until the next contraction came, which was pretty fast. I knew that would be probably the most uncomfortable part (shoulders rotating and birthing always are for me, and that is also when I tear each time), so when the contraction came I pushed but blew once I reached the point of wanting to shout about it, and just tried to let him come at his own speed (which was very fast but felt like a long and dreadful sensation all the same!). In my mind I was frantically saying to myself, "He's here, he's here, this part means he's here, let him come, let him come!" to try and ride out the moment until it was over. I knew it wouldn't take long, but I just needed something to cope with the awfulness of it!
And then it WAS over! :) Oh the relief and the absolute joy, looking down and reaching for him as they passed this TEENY little person up between my legs and onto my tummy. He was fairly quiet at first but soon became very agitated and cried quite a lot for a long time, even with snuggles and lots of love on my tummy/chest! He pinked up almost immediately.
Elijah had a true knot in his cord!!! How incredibly scary, if I had known that while still pregnant, and how thankful I am to God for sparing his life. Jackie said she rarely sees a true knot, and she's surprised his heartrate was so good all the way through labour right to the very point of birth! I asked if it could account for his slower growth, but she didn't think so particularly. He's very healthy and his cord was pulsating well still. At the scans, they had done dopplers on his umbilical cord several times to check the resistance of the flow, and it was normal and fine. I took a photo of the cord and placenta, which I could post but it's pretty gory! ;) I will if you want me to though! :)
His placenta took AGES to come out! Aaaages. I had a natural third stage as I had wanted, though they were ready to the syntometrine injection because it really wasn't coming out. I kept having contractions and it still didn't appear, and Elijah had a nice long feed but still nothing! Eventually they had me get out of bed and sit on a potty on the chair to see if gravity helped, but it didn't, and I became very tired being upright and didn't feel nice after a while, so they put me back to bed.
Eventually I wondered about the whole pregnancy/pre-labour thing being SO very contrary! No matter what decision I made, at that point something would change and I would have to do the opposite thing, and then when I thought that was going ahead, something would change again, hehe! So I said this to the midwives, and then said, "I'm saying out loud (looking sternly at my baggy tummy and directing my words in its general direction!), "I'm going to have the syntometrine injection now"!!" and then I literally immediately had a contraction and pushed, and out came my placenta in one go, all intact, lol! It was so funny because of how no matter what I've said over the past 4 days, the opposite has then occurred, and it happened just the same for the placenta in such a funny way! ;) I think it was over an hour or 90 minutes waiting for it, up to that point! They let me go longer than they usually would, just to try and keep it all as natural as possible.
They couldn't 100% confirm that all the membranes were out, because there were some ragged parts, but they told me that my body will work any little bits out, and I need to call them if I have large clots or heavy bleeding, so they can check me out.
I felt kind of feverish the last hour or two of my labour, and I took my temperature (as I had been doing 4-hourly) a couple of hours before the end, but it was normal. I figured I just felt hot because it was a REALLY hot day in a south-facing bedroom, and I was labouring. When Elijah was born and they took his temperature, it was up a little, and my heart sank. It was 37.6, so they uncovered him (he was skin-to-skin at the time, but covered with a towel for warmth) and his temp came down to normal really quick. All his other obs were fine. I wanted to take my own temperature because I did feel a bit too hot, not-right hot, you know? Eventually after the placenta palava, they did my obs and my temperature was almost the same as Elijah's had been - 37.5. I was worried it was a sign of infection, after how long my waters were broken, but they said to take some paracetamol and they would take it again before they left. It came down to almost normal, and has been back up to 37.2 (barely a raised temp at all) once the paracetamol wore off, but I've taken some more now. They said they aren't concerned about my temp, and that once the day's heat cools off and I get some rest, if it's spiking up then I need to call them and they will check me and provide me with antibiotics in case of infection, if that's the case. Otherwise they'd expect it to stay low or non-existant. An infection would make it spike higher, or produce other symptoms along with a fever eventually, so I am just keeping an eye on myself really.
I have felt remarkably well since giving birth! Probably the most well I've ever felt after birth, which is lovely! I didn't feel weak and wobbly at all after the first hour or two, and usually that doesn't happen for the first 24 hours or so. I have been able to get up and go to the loo without shuffling along feeling weak and dreadful, verrrry slowly! ;) Also, I did not need any stitches this time!!!!! :D My very first time ever not having stitches! Jackie found that I did have a tear, but it was so small. She said that she could put a couple of stitches in for me, but it wasn't bleeding at all so she felt it would be fine to just leave it to heal, if I wanted. And I DID want! ;) Stitches are no fun!
I am not feeling any soreness at all from my perineum, and weeing stings a little bit but it's perfectly bearable. My blood loss is normal at the moment and I am not having a horrible time at all with after pains - maybe the paracetamol is helping there though?
Elijah is breastfeeding well, and sleeping sooooo cutely in between. He did a huuuuuge meconium poo all over my tummy within minutes of birth, and the little waters that were left to go pop as his head was born had some meconium in them, but not much. He has done a huge meconium poo in his first nappy so far, but I am not sure if he's weed yet. I am doing his observations 2-hourly around the clock - temperature, respirations, heart rate, etc. I use my stethoscope for his heart rate. Everything is normal so far, except that last time I took his temp it was a bit too low, so I've put him in a sleepsuit instead of a vest (it's so hot, and he's on my body most of the time so I'd thought a vest was enough). Hopefully his temp has come up now. It's time to do his next set of obs so I must go.
Here are a few photos of the big boys meeting their new baby brother for the first time, about 2 hours after he was born, and then one of him finally dressed in something at about 4 hours old. He's so delightfully gorgeous and tiny (oh I almost forgot! He weighed in at 6lbs 8oz, sweet little manny!) and I think he looks most like newborn Nathan, but he's very much his own little person with his own look. ALL the boys are ecstatic about him, and Samuel is very relaxed and smiley around him too.
Thank you for praying and commenting! I really appreciate it! :)
40 weeks, 4 days - STILLLLLL pregnant!
There's really no time for an update but I must just dash one off quickly!
Midwife came round and found Elijah too high (totally un-engaged) to safely perform a sweep, in case of cord prolapse, so I had to go into hospital (with Heather) for induction.
When we got there, they checked my tummy first and thought he was actually WELL engaged, but couldn't be sure if it was a bottom or a head! :S So I had to decide what to do. I decided to go with the option they gave of having an internal examination to determine his position, and if his head was down AND low enough, to have a sweep. If they found bulging waters, then NOT to break them as a method of inducing labour, because they said if I had just the sweep then they would let me go home and wait for labour to start a bit longer, and sweeps have always worked for me in the past, so I went with that.
They found his head nice and low, hooray! I was 2-3cm dilated, cervix at the front (ready for labour, good sign), thick but soft. So they did the sweep, which was amazingly NOT painful, just a bit uncomfy - I was so surprised! :) She found no membranes to break, but felt that he had them tightly plastered over his head, thus nothing bulging to pop. She said if that's how I normally "do it" then no wonder they always break right as the babies are crowning, and that's good. The leak of amniotic fluid that I have is like Nathan's one, from higher up (the hindwaters), and it's continuous but not very plentiful.
So I came home (so relieved!) and waited. EVERYONE was so confident that I would go into labour, but somehow I just didn't share their confidence. My mum said on the phone that I was being negative about it, but honestly I did not feel confident that I would actually start contracting. I know there was every reason that I WOULD, and my cervix was obviously ready, but still...
So I was exhausted and still had a horrid headache last night, and went to bed at 10.30ish, having had a few random "tightenings" since the sweep, some sore in my groin, lower back and under my bump at the front, which was vaguely encouraging. It did seem to me that it coincided with Elijah moving around vigorously though, which I thought was more likely to be my womb just being irritable and reacting solely because of that, but anyway...
It took me a little while to go to sleep, and I woke at 2am and then for the day pretty much at 5.15am when Samuel woke Neil up and they went downstairs. I took my temperature pretty much 3-hourly (it's fine) overnight because they want me to take it 4-hourly to keep an eye for signs of infection since my waters broke so long ago. It's still fine this morning, but I have a totally calm womb - no contractions - and I am not in the least bit surprised for some reason. I can't explain it, it's weird!
I went back to bed at 6.15 - all the boys were up by then, and I had a chance to calmly talk to them about what to expect for the day ahead, that Mummy was going to go into hospital since I had no contractions (Arthur asked the instant he woke up if I was having any, and was so disappointed and anxious when I said not, poor love!), and I would get a special medicine to help the baby come quicker, and I would need to stay there to have the baby. Yesterday they were prepped for this because Neil told them the same stuff while they were out at the park (I had to go while they were out and I called them on the mobile to let them know), but although they accepted it, some of them were a bit upset. Matthew in particular felt very sad about me not being home for a couple of days, and was quite tearful on the way home :( It's just SO much better for us ALL when I have homebirths. *sigh*
So, they are duly prepped by a cheerful mummy in advance, which is better, I hope. I have phoned Heather and she's on her way round. I phoned labour ward and they know I'm coming and are ready for me. I had breakfast (cereal) at 5.30ish because I don't want to eat any more once things are getting going, and I pretty much knew I'd be going in at that point. Since then I went back to bed and dozed/slept until 7ish, and when I woke I was having waves of crampy sensations, front and back. They felt like contractions, but my tummy wasn't going hard and they were VERY short (like 10-20 seconds) and came every few minutes. If I lay on my side they were there, but if I lay on my back to see if they carried on, they didn't. I decided I still felt really tired so I had a bit more sleep until 8ish, and there was no change with the crampy sensations, so I am getting up and getting going.
I am dreading a canula in my arm! I get really panicky about having an IV! But I do feel at peace about it, like it's for the best - I will be relieved to get antibiotics going in for my little one now. I am getting worried about him even though he is probably absolutely going to be fine. It will be extra peace of mind to know I've had the antibiotics to cover him for infection (and me too, I suppose). He is active this morning so that's reassuring too. He was SO active (I mean, like he wasn't that thrilled, lol!) after the sweep, for an hour or so! ;)
I do love him SO much. I am excited like I can't describe about getting to meet him today. I just can't wait to have my arms filled with him, but I'm feeling kind of scared about the process necessary to get to that point. I'm anxious about labour and birth suddenly, no matter whether it's at home or not! I know Heather will help me stay calm and I will try to keep focused on God. Oh I must try to remember to tell you (after it all, obviously) about the midwife, Anne, who came round to do a sweep yesterday and ended up sending me in. Don't let me forget! ;)
I am not sure if I'll be able to update in hospital. They do have pay-as-you-go internet but I am thinking Heather will have me staying quiet and trying to keep as "inside myself" as possible during labour, which will not involve trying to type on an annoying keyboard! ;) I don't have a mobile phone (gasp, lol!) so can't text an update to Facebook even. I don't have any idea what lies ahead in terms of staying in hospital afterwards. I know their policy is to monitor the baby for like 48 hours or something after birth with a GBS+ mother, but I don't intend to follow that anywhere other than my own home (I am perfectly able to monitor him if he seems healthy at birth, like I have for my others). I do have the issue of probably not feeling up to getting out of bed to COME home for a while... I'm not sure how that will work. I know I will be longing to get home to my little ones, but not sure if I can physically manage it for a while. I have told the boys I will likely be staying overnight tonight at the hospital, if everything goes fine and he's born today.
I'm so nervous about complications! I hope the baby copes well with labour, and that the induction works well and quickly. I know C-section isn't the end of the world or anything, but I can't tell you how desperately I wish to avoid one! Obviously if it's necessary for the baby to be born alive, then ABSOLUTELY. But I'm scared of ending up needing one. Please pray!
I'll update asap! It's a beautiful day to be born here - it's going to be hot and sunny and gorgeous all day. Probably too hot for a homebirth, for me personally, so at least I'll get to have him on a lovely day whilst enjoying the "cool" of the hospital! ;)
Midwife came round and found Elijah too high (totally un-engaged) to safely perform a sweep, in case of cord prolapse, so I had to go into hospital (with Heather) for induction.
When we got there, they checked my tummy first and thought he was actually WELL engaged, but couldn't be sure if it was a bottom or a head! :S So I had to decide what to do. I decided to go with the option they gave of having an internal examination to determine his position, and if his head was down AND low enough, to have a sweep. If they found bulging waters, then NOT to break them as a method of inducing labour, because they said if I had just the sweep then they would let me go home and wait for labour to start a bit longer, and sweeps have always worked for me in the past, so I went with that.
They found his head nice and low, hooray! I was 2-3cm dilated, cervix at the front (ready for labour, good sign), thick but soft. So they did the sweep, which was amazingly NOT painful, just a bit uncomfy - I was so surprised! :) She found no membranes to break, but felt that he had them tightly plastered over his head, thus nothing bulging to pop. She said if that's how I normally "do it" then no wonder they always break right as the babies are crowning, and that's good. The leak of amniotic fluid that I have is like Nathan's one, from higher up (the hindwaters), and it's continuous but not very plentiful.
So I came home (so relieved!) and waited. EVERYONE was so confident that I would go into labour, but somehow I just didn't share their confidence. My mum said on the phone that I was being negative about it, but honestly I did not feel confident that I would actually start contracting. I know there was every reason that I WOULD, and my cervix was obviously ready, but still...
So I was exhausted and still had a horrid headache last night, and went to bed at 10.30ish, having had a few random "tightenings" since the sweep, some sore in my groin, lower back and under my bump at the front, which was vaguely encouraging. It did seem to me that it coincided with Elijah moving around vigorously though, which I thought was more likely to be my womb just being irritable and reacting solely because of that, but anyway...
It took me a little while to go to sleep, and I woke at 2am and then for the day pretty much at 5.15am when Samuel woke Neil up and they went downstairs. I took my temperature pretty much 3-hourly (it's fine) overnight because they want me to take it 4-hourly to keep an eye for signs of infection since my waters broke so long ago. It's still fine this morning, but I have a totally calm womb - no contractions - and I am not in the least bit surprised for some reason. I can't explain it, it's weird!
I went back to bed at 6.15 - all the boys were up by then, and I had a chance to calmly talk to them about what to expect for the day ahead, that Mummy was going to go into hospital since I had no contractions (Arthur asked the instant he woke up if I was having any, and was so disappointed and anxious when I said not, poor love!), and I would get a special medicine to help the baby come quicker, and I would need to stay there to have the baby. Yesterday they were prepped for this because Neil told them the same stuff while they were out at the park (I had to go while they were out and I called them on the mobile to let them know), but although they accepted it, some of them were a bit upset. Matthew in particular felt very sad about me not being home for a couple of days, and was quite tearful on the way home :( It's just SO much better for us ALL when I have homebirths. *sigh*
So, they are duly prepped by a cheerful mummy in advance, which is better, I hope. I have phoned Heather and she's on her way round. I phoned labour ward and they know I'm coming and are ready for me. I had breakfast (cereal) at 5.30ish because I don't want to eat any more once things are getting going, and I pretty much knew I'd be going in at that point. Since then I went back to bed and dozed/slept until 7ish, and when I woke I was having waves of crampy sensations, front and back. They felt like contractions, but my tummy wasn't going hard and they were VERY short (like 10-20 seconds) and came every few minutes. If I lay on my side they were there, but if I lay on my back to see if they carried on, they didn't. I decided I still felt really tired so I had a bit more sleep until 8ish, and there was no change with the crampy sensations, so I am getting up and getting going.
I am dreading a canula in my arm! I get really panicky about having an IV! But I do feel at peace about it, like it's for the best - I will be relieved to get antibiotics going in for my little one now. I am getting worried about him even though he is probably absolutely going to be fine. It will be extra peace of mind to know I've had the antibiotics to cover him for infection (and me too, I suppose). He is active this morning so that's reassuring too. He was SO active (I mean, like he wasn't that thrilled, lol!) after the sweep, for an hour or so! ;)
I do love him SO much. I am excited like I can't describe about getting to meet him today. I just can't wait to have my arms filled with him, but I'm feeling kind of scared about the process necessary to get to that point. I'm anxious about labour and birth suddenly, no matter whether it's at home or not! I know Heather will help me stay calm and I will try to keep focused on God. Oh I must try to remember to tell you (after it all, obviously) about the midwife, Anne, who came round to do a sweep yesterday and ended up sending me in. Don't let me forget! ;)
I am not sure if I'll be able to update in hospital. They do have pay-as-you-go internet but I am thinking Heather will have me staying quiet and trying to keep as "inside myself" as possible during labour, which will not involve trying to type on an annoying keyboard! ;) I don't have a mobile phone (gasp, lol!) so can't text an update to Facebook even. I don't have any idea what lies ahead in terms of staying in hospital afterwards. I know their policy is to monitor the baby for like 48 hours or something after birth with a GBS+ mother, but I don't intend to follow that anywhere other than my own home (I am perfectly able to monitor him if he seems healthy at birth, like I have for my others). I do have the issue of probably not feeling up to getting out of bed to COME home for a while... I'm not sure how that will work. I know I will be longing to get home to my little ones, but not sure if I can physically manage it for a while. I have told the boys I will likely be staying overnight tonight at the hospital, if everything goes fine and he's born today.
I'm so nervous about complications! I hope the baby copes well with labour, and that the induction works well and quickly. I know C-section isn't the end of the world or anything, but I can't tell you how desperately I wish to avoid one! Obviously if it's necessary for the baby to be born alive, then ABSOLUTELY. But I'm scared of ending up needing one. Please pray!
I'll update asap! It's a beautiful day to be born here - it's going to be hot and sunny and gorgeous all day. Probably too hot for a homebirth, for me personally, so at least I'll get to have him on a lovely day whilst enjoying the "cool" of the hospital! ;)
Saturday, May 26, 2012
40 weeks, 3 days - still here!
Quick update!
It's now 12.55pm the next day after my waters broke, and I'm still at home. Having the most fabulous care from the head of community midwives, Jackie, who is calling me from home regularly to check on me, and telling me she plans to come out to attend my labour and birth when it starts! HOW WONDERFUL!
The only thing is, I am still not in labour. I have had NO contractions whatsoever, so far. This morning I have been having light pink staining on my pad along with the continuing waters draining, and that's really encouraging because Heather says that is a bloody show - labour should not be far off. Last time I had a bloody show without any other signs of labour was with Benjamin, and contractions started probably 4 or 5 hours later. So far there's still nothing, and I am not sure what to expect.
A midwife is on her way over right this minute to give me "a really good sweep", which is a slightly nerve-wracking thought! :S The idea is that it should put me into labour pretty quickly (today) and then I can hurry up and have my little manny. If it doesn't, then I will need to go into hospital - there's no exact time-frame, but probably this evening? Or tomorrow morning? Because the risk of infection to the baby is gradually increasing (it's tiny, but still there), and will become more so once somebody has done an internal examination and a sweep. The Group B Strep is the only reason for any pressure of any sort, but even so the risks are still low to Elijah. I have to keep remembering that, because there is so much HYPE about GBS, but the risks are actually really really (really) low. Jackie and Heather keep reminding me which is very reassuring and helpful! Jackie says she would probably be erring on the side of caution later today if nothing was happening, and suggesting (though she said I absolutely don't HAVE to) that I go into hospital and get labour started so that it isn't going on too long. I am open to that, I just wish I would start contracting already so that I can have this baby at home! I will be anxious about him when he's born even so, hoping that he's okay. But I just want to HAVE him already! Please please body, pleeeease start contracting.
Heather brought round some clary sage oil last night and put it in her oil burner, because apparently it can get contractions going. But it did nothing at all for me - I had the quietest evening for BH contractions for ages, even! Ah the irony! ;) Today I have refreshed the clary sage and have been on my birth ball bouncing a bit. There's not that much in the way of waters leaking. They are draining continually but in very small amounts - it's a tiny leak more than a gusher, and I should think he is still surrounded by pretty much all of his amniotic fluid still. I don't think I've lost all that much in total. I've soaked through three maternity pads since last night, so that's not that much considering the pints and pints that are in there! ;) The fluid is still nice and clear, and Elijah is moving around a lot today.
I didn't sleep too well - well it took me a while to get to sleep with RLS again, but eventually I got up and stretched my legs and directed the fan at my feet, and went to sleep pretty quickly after that. I don't know what time it was, maybe 2am? Then I slept solidly until about 5.15, and dozed until 6.30 when I got up (the boys were up already). I had a horrible headache, which I had last night and it didn't go away with painkillers. It was fine while I was sleeping, but within about 60 seconds of being awake it came back. It's in my eyes and sinuses and forehead, ugh. It's definitely the most bothersome thing I'm dealing with today. I have had another round of painkillers this morning but it has persisted all the same.
Heather is running a stall at a craft fair this morning and for the next hour probably, but it's in our local area, and she has her phone with her. She took her hubby and daughter with her so that they can take over the instant she needs to dash off to be with me. I would sort of like her to be with me now, especially for the sweep, but there's nothing actually happening so she might as well finish her craft fair. I've phoned her several times though, for advice and to update her, so we can be in touch just fine.
I have had a bath (having cleaned it first) - Heather said it was fine to have a bath in my own bath tub! Now I have laid a maternity bed pad on the bed and I await the midwife! Please pray that this sweep will work almost immediately (the last one got me very crampy from about 10 mins after being done, but Matthew's did not work until the next morning) and I will have my baby today - at home would be so so so wonderful. But I want what's best and safest for him. At this stage, hospital is not yet the safest place for him to be born. Home is safer until there's enough of a risk to him, and there isn't just yet. I am taking my temperature every 4 hours as they've instructed me to, so if that goes up then I will go in straight away.
I will try to keep my blog posted, but if I can't, I will update when I can afterwards. If you know me on Facebook, please please don't mention Elijah's name by mistake when commenting on my statuses! If you happen to see someone who's done so, would you please mind sending them a quick message so they can delete it asap. His name is the only thing I haven't announced to my real life friends and some family members and the entire of my church, all of whom follow me on Facebook, and there have been a couple of slip-ups already from online friends who know Elijah's name - thankfully I saw them quickly and deleted the comments, hopefully before anyone who didn't know saw them! I can't wait to announce his name and birth details - that part is SO much fun! :)
Okay, better get off the laptop ready for the midwife. I think I will lie down and rest until she's here because my head is sore and I feel quite tired now. I did sleep again from about 7.45 to just before 9am when the phone woke me (Heather was checking on me). It felt like good sleep, but the headache started again right after I woke. I'm eating and drinking, and otherwise feeling fine, but it's juuuust starting to become a little bit too hot for comfort in terms of the weather, even with the windows open and a good strong breeze blowing. Hopefully I'll keep cool enough. The weather could easily cause me headaches like this, but I did have a hormonal cry yesterday morning and it seems like every time I cry I end up with horrible sinusy headaches the next day, for ages! Hopefully it'll go away soon though. Will be back when I can! :)
It's now 12.55pm the next day after my waters broke, and I'm still at home. Having the most fabulous care from the head of community midwives, Jackie, who is calling me from home regularly to check on me, and telling me she plans to come out to attend my labour and birth when it starts! HOW WONDERFUL!
The only thing is, I am still not in labour. I have had NO contractions whatsoever, so far. This morning I have been having light pink staining on my pad along with the continuing waters draining, and that's really encouraging because Heather says that is a bloody show - labour should not be far off. Last time I had a bloody show without any other signs of labour was with Benjamin, and contractions started probably 4 or 5 hours later. So far there's still nothing, and I am not sure what to expect.
A midwife is on her way over right this minute to give me "a really good sweep", which is a slightly nerve-wracking thought! :S The idea is that it should put me into labour pretty quickly (today) and then I can hurry up and have my little manny. If it doesn't, then I will need to go into hospital - there's no exact time-frame, but probably this evening? Or tomorrow morning? Because the risk of infection to the baby is gradually increasing (it's tiny, but still there), and will become more so once somebody has done an internal examination and a sweep. The Group B Strep is the only reason for any pressure of any sort, but even so the risks are still low to Elijah. I have to keep remembering that, because there is so much HYPE about GBS, but the risks are actually really really (really) low. Jackie and Heather keep reminding me which is very reassuring and helpful! Jackie says she would probably be erring on the side of caution later today if nothing was happening, and suggesting (though she said I absolutely don't HAVE to) that I go into hospital and get labour started so that it isn't going on too long. I am open to that, I just wish I would start contracting already so that I can have this baby at home! I will be anxious about him when he's born even so, hoping that he's okay. But I just want to HAVE him already! Please please body, pleeeease start contracting.
Heather brought round some clary sage oil last night and put it in her oil burner, because apparently it can get contractions going. But it did nothing at all for me - I had the quietest evening for BH contractions for ages, even! Ah the irony! ;) Today I have refreshed the clary sage and have been on my birth ball bouncing a bit. There's not that much in the way of waters leaking. They are draining continually but in very small amounts - it's a tiny leak more than a gusher, and I should think he is still surrounded by pretty much all of his amniotic fluid still. I don't think I've lost all that much in total. I've soaked through three maternity pads since last night, so that's not that much considering the pints and pints that are in there! ;) The fluid is still nice and clear, and Elijah is moving around a lot today.
I didn't sleep too well - well it took me a while to get to sleep with RLS again, but eventually I got up and stretched my legs and directed the fan at my feet, and went to sleep pretty quickly after that. I don't know what time it was, maybe 2am? Then I slept solidly until about 5.15, and dozed until 6.30 when I got up (the boys were up already). I had a horrible headache, which I had last night and it didn't go away with painkillers. It was fine while I was sleeping, but within about 60 seconds of being awake it came back. It's in my eyes and sinuses and forehead, ugh. It's definitely the most bothersome thing I'm dealing with today. I have had another round of painkillers this morning but it has persisted all the same.
Heather is running a stall at a craft fair this morning and for the next hour probably, but it's in our local area, and she has her phone with her. She took her hubby and daughter with her so that they can take over the instant she needs to dash off to be with me. I would sort of like her to be with me now, especially for the sweep, but there's nothing actually happening so she might as well finish her craft fair. I've phoned her several times though, for advice and to update her, so we can be in touch just fine.
I have had a bath (having cleaned it first) - Heather said it was fine to have a bath in my own bath tub! Now I have laid a maternity bed pad on the bed and I await the midwife! Please pray that this sweep will work almost immediately (the last one got me very crampy from about 10 mins after being done, but Matthew's did not work until the next morning) and I will have my baby today - at home would be so so so wonderful. But I want what's best and safest for him. At this stage, hospital is not yet the safest place for him to be born. Home is safer until there's enough of a risk to him, and there isn't just yet. I am taking my temperature every 4 hours as they've instructed me to, so if that goes up then I will go in straight away.
I will try to keep my blog posted, but if I can't, I will update when I can afterwards. If you know me on Facebook, please please don't mention Elijah's name by mistake when commenting on my statuses! If you happen to see someone who's done so, would you please mind sending them a quick message so they can delete it asap. His name is the only thing I haven't announced to my real life friends and some family members and the entire of my church, all of whom follow me on Facebook, and there have been a couple of slip-ups already from online friends who know Elijah's name - thankfully I saw them quickly and deleted the comments, hopefully before anyone who didn't know saw them! I can't wait to announce his name and birth details - that part is SO much fun! :)
Okay, better get off the laptop ready for the midwife. I think I will lie down and rest until she's here because my head is sore and I feel quite tired now. I did sleep again from about 7.45 to just before 9am when the phone woke me (Heather was checking on me). It felt like good sleep, but the headache started again right after I woke. I'm eating and drinking, and otherwise feeling fine, but it's juuuust starting to become a little bit too hot for comfort in terms of the weather, even with the windows open and a good strong breeze blowing. Hopefully I'll keep cool enough. The weather could easily cause me headaches like this, but I did have a hormonal cry yesterday morning and it seems like every time I cry I end up with horrible sinusy headaches the next day, for ages! Hopefully it'll go away soon though. Will be back when I can! :)
Friday, May 25, 2012
40w2d - waters have broken! :)
Today Elijah has moved SO VERY LITTLE, it has been worrying. When he hadn't moved at all except for one little shoulder shrug by 11.30am, I phoned Heather and she said to call the Day Assessment Unit, because it would be wise to go and have him checked out. She said he could just be gearing up for labour, but it's better to check if it was 5 or 6 hours. My doppler battery was dead so I couldn't check him, and it was a worry because I had done the cold drink/bar of chocolate trick and he still hadn't moved.
I phoned the DAU and they said to come in, so Neil came home from work as fast as he could (took an hour, which is normal), and then I picked Heather up and we went to the hospital. While we were on the way, Elijah suddenly pushed his little feet about! Just for a minute, but it was such a relief!
We had quite a wait at the hospital before they had a bed free for me, but then they hooked me up to the monitors and all was fine. His heartrate was in the 130s and 140s most of the time, but after a while he started to be REALLY active, the little monkey! ;) His heart rate responded great to his movements, and they monitored him for half an hour. I had two contractions during that time, just BHs but it was nice to see the proper little "hills" on the trace all the same!
Anyway, that was that. They were happy with him and said maybe he's just gearing up for labour (everyone is saying that!).
I was sitting on the kitchen bench, having made fairy cakes (yay, the last baking item I wanted to get done - I did flapjacks last night!) and macaroni cheese for dinner. Neil was serving the food and I was chatting to him, when suddenly I felt a sort of.... leaky let-down feel. I didn't mention it to Neil, I said I was just going to the loo, and went to check on what it was. I was hoping it might be a show of some sort - I could already tell it wasn't urine - it just wasn't coming from the right place.
When I pulled down my underwear I had a pantyliner on, and whatever fluid it was had no colour. There wasn't much at all, so I sat down on the toilet, and then some fluid sort of fell out of me into the water. Just like that! And then nothing more. I looked down and could see that it was cloudy/white in the water. I wiped and basically had a lot of mucus plug with whatever else was there, but nothing bloody. After I emptied my bladder there was still the odd leaky feel, so I put another pantyliner on, and went downstairs to tell Neil that something was leaking, and mayyybe it could possibly be my waters? I didn't know at the time, but it was certainly occuring to me that it might be. I was just talking to him (standing up in the kitchen) when there was that same sort of slow let-down feel of fluid, and I went back upstairs to check it while everyone else started dinner.
Nothing much on the pad, but definitely something. I sat down on the toilet again and there was a tiny leak into the water (not wee). Then nothing more. I decided to lean right back on the seat and then right forwards, and right back again, and sure enough when I leaned back some fluid leaked out. It was still clear/cloudy-looking in the water.
I phoned Heather straight away and she said to put a big pad on, lie down for half an hour, and then stand up, and if my waters had broken I would know about it! ;) So I called down to Neil and he came out of the kitchen (I really didn't want to alert the boys), and I told him what she'd said.
I lay down for 30 mins, and Elijah was SO active the whole time! Downstairs I could hear the boys practically manic and hyper - they've been SO difficult today, and Samuel hasn't wanted me to leave the room which isn't like him, so that was a hmmm moment for me as well. When I got up, I felt some leaking, but not much. I sat back down on the bed and sort of rolled down to one side, legs still over the edge, and then back up to sitting, and down to the other side, and yeahhhh - definitely leaking fluid! So I phoned Heather back and she said that was definitely my waters having broken!
I can't believe my waters have broken BEFORE labour! Urgh. I am not sure if I will be able to have this baby at home, because of the Group B Strep - I have to go in if they break early. Right now it's 9pm (2 hours later) and I am not having any contractions, and I'm continually leaking small amounts of fluid. I managed to do the usual bedtime routine with the boys, and they're all asleep. Heather is on her way over and then I guess when I call the midwife I will be asked to go in. I don't know.
One way or the other, Elijah is coming! :) Please please pray that if I am to have a hospital birth there will be no need for interventions (other than maybe they'll induce me), and everything will go quickly and smoothly. I will have to stay in for Elijah to be monitored at least 24 hours, which will be hard for me hormonally speaking, since I always can't stand to be away from my other children. So thankful Heather will be with me! I need to go now since she's on her way, and I haven't phoned my mum to update her yet.
Hopefully May 26th will be Elijah's birthday! I can't wait to hold his sweet little self! I will update when I can, but I am not sure when that will be.
I phoned the DAU and they said to come in, so Neil came home from work as fast as he could (took an hour, which is normal), and then I picked Heather up and we went to the hospital. While we were on the way, Elijah suddenly pushed his little feet about! Just for a minute, but it was such a relief!
We had quite a wait at the hospital before they had a bed free for me, but then they hooked me up to the monitors and all was fine. His heartrate was in the 130s and 140s most of the time, but after a while he started to be REALLY active, the little monkey! ;) His heart rate responded great to his movements, and they monitored him for half an hour. I had two contractions during that time, just BHs but it was nice to see the proper little "hills" on the trace all the same!
Anyway, that was that. They were happy with him and said maybe he's just gearing up for labour (everyone is saying that!).
I was sitting on the kitchen bench, having made fairy cakes (yay, the last baking item I wanted to get done - I did flapjacks last night!) and macaroni cheese for dinner. Neil was serving the food and I was chatting to him, when suddenly I felt a sort of.... leaky let-down feel. I didn't mention it to Neil, I said I was just going to the loo, and went to check on what it was. I was hoping it might be a show of some sort - I could already tell it wasn't urine - it just wasn't coming from the right place.
When I pulled down my underwear I had a pantyliner on, and whatever fluid it was had no colour. There wasn't much at all, so I sat down on the toilet, and then some fluid sort of fell out of me into the water. Just like that! And then nothing more. I looked down and could see that it was cloudy/white in the water. I wiped and basically had a lot of mucus plug with whatever else was there, but nothing bloody. After I emptied my bladder there was still the odd leaky feel, so I put another pantyliner on, and went downstairs to tell Neil that something was leaking, and mayyybe it could possibly be my waters? I didn't know at the time, but it was certainly occuring to me that it might be. I was just talking to him (standing up in the kitchen) when there was that same sort of slow let-down feel of fluid, and I went back upstairs to check it while everyone else started dinner.
Nothing much on the pad, but definitely something. I sat down on the toilet again and there was a tiny leak into the water (not wee). Then nothing more. I decided to lean right back on the seat and then right forwards, and right back again, and sure enough when I leaned back some fluid leaked out. It was still clear/cloudy-looking in the water.
I phoned Heather straight away and she said to put a big pad on, lie down for half an hour, and then stand up, and if my waters had broken I would know about it! ;) So I called down to Neil and he came out of the kitchen (I really didn't want to alert the boys), and I told him what she'd said.
I lay down for 30 mins, and Elijah was SO active the whole time! Downstairs I could hear the boys practically manic and hyper - they've been SO difficult today, and Samuel hasn't wanted me to leave the room which isn't like him, so that was a hmmm moment for me as well. When I got up, I felt some leaking, but not much. I sat back down on the bed and sort of rolled down to one side, legs still over the edge, and then back up to sitting, and down to the other side, and yeahhhh - definitely leaking fluid! So I phoned Heather back and she said that was definitely my waters having broken!
I can't believe my waters have broken BEFORE labour! Urgh. I am not sure if I will be able to have this baby at home, because of the Group B Strep - I have to go in if they break early. Right now it's 9pm (2 hours later) and I am not having any contractions, and I'm continually leaking small amounts of fluid. I managed to do the usual bedtime routine with the boys, and they're all asleep. Heather is on her way over and then I guess when I call the midwife I will be asked to go in. I don't know.
One way or the other, Elijah is coming! :) Please please pray that if I am to have a hospital birth there will be no need for interventions (other than maybe they'll induce me), and everything will go quickly and smoothly. I will have to stay in for Elijah to be monitored at least 24 hours, which will be hard for me hormonally speaking, since I always can't stand to be away from my other children. So thankful Heather will be with me! I need to go now since she's on her way, and I haven't phoned my mum to update her yet.
Hopefully May 26th will be Elijah's birthday! I can't wait to hold his sweet little self! I will update when I can, but I am not sure when that will be.
40 weeks, 2 days
Just a quick post if I can manage one, because I didn't get round to the usual evening bulletin (!) last night, and now it's the morning I haven't got much time with the little ones up and about.
Yesterday Neil stayed home all day!!! :) In the morning I had quite a few strong BHs though nothing remotely regular, and I had a SHOW!!! So exciting! It was not a bloody show, so nothing that tells me for sure that labour is on the way imminently, but well enough mucus plug to be a proper show. Neil took the boys to the park in the morning before the heat of the day set in, and then phoned work to say I'd had a show (which occurred while they were out) and decided to take the day as holiday time if labour didn't start. Work have been very good and he hardly has any work to do there at the moment anyway, because they know I'm about to have a baby so they've pretty much cleared his calendar and given him temporary bits and pieces to do. Makes for a bit of a boring time for him there while he waits, but it's easy for him to drop it and go when he needs to without impacting on the work being done, so that's good.
Anyway, such a lovely lovely relief, to know the boys were getting out in the lovely weather. They were right to go out in the morning. It was 82 degrees (28C) in the afternoon and kind of muggy with it, and we all just flaked out wearing as little as possible with the curtains closed to keep the sun out. The air outside was much much warmer than inside, so we had to keep the windows shut too, urgh. NOT a day to give birth!
How I wished I would have a baby yesterday! But when I was trying to rest during the afternoon I realised it was a BAD day to have a homebirth. Baaaad. My bedroom is where I give birth, and it faces south. It's a tiny bedroom and when I'm labouring we keep the door shut. Even with the fan on full-blast and the blackout curtains shut (and window, to keep the hot air out), it was pretty unbearable to try to even rest in, let alone labour and give birth. Today is meant to be a bit cooler, but I'm not sure now. It looks like it's going to get as hot as yesterday to me... Anyway, hot enough for the bedroom to be pretty awful again, so I guess it wouldn't be great to have to try and labour in there again this afternoon. Evenings are obviously better in there with the window open, without the sun on the front of the house, and the mornings have a lovely cool breeze until noon-ish. But it doesn't get comfortable in the bedroom until about 4am! :S We do have an air conditioning unit that we can plug in and hang the hose out of the boys' bedroom window, but if my door is closed for labour and birth then I won't feel the effects of that anyway. We had to switch it on in the end yesterday, and it made the boys' room much more bearable for bedtime.
The night before last (after I last updated) I had SUCH a bad sleep! My RLS was the worst it has been, and even my usual stretches didn't make any difference. I couldn't get cool enough even with the fan on full, 2 feet from the bed, and the window and curtains wide open! The main distraction was that my feet felt really swollen and burning, and I couldn't elevate them properly since I can't lie on my back without feeling lightheaded now my bump is this big and heavy. I just tossed and turned and got up and stretched my legs, and did it all over again, until after 3am. A fox was dragging a bin about in the street for a while which was distracting! ;) I must have dozed off sometime between 3 and 4am, but I woke on the dot of 4am from a fragmented dream as though I had just had a shallow sleep a few minutes long. I had to go for a wee, and then thankfully I went to sleep, but woke at 5.45 and couldn't get back to sleep after that. Ugh! So thankful that Neil was home, but all the times I tried to go to bed and get some sleep, I just couldn't drop off no matter what I tried. My legs went horribly jumpy every time I lay down, or even sat still. In the end when they went out, and I had a show (yay!), I had a bath (trying to keep those quite frequent now, knowing that I could be giving birth soon!) and then pumped up the birth ball which I found at the bottom of my homebirth box. I thought I had lost the plug for it, but I found it in the bedside table drawer, yay!
I sat on the birth ball in my bedroom and bounced while I prayed through the prayers that Heather printed out and laminated for me when I was expecting Benjamin - they are based on the ones at the back of the book "Supernatural Childbirth" and I love them because they're so declarative and faith-based! They soothe me and make me feel more confident about what's ahead, and about my baby and myself being well. One of them is specifically a prayer against fear, which is very apt for me at pretty much all times! After I prayed, I sang some worship songs for a while and bounced some more. It was actually a really lovely time! Then I felt tired out, and tried to rest again, but to no avail. I kept going to the loo and checking but I had no more mucus plug.
Most of the day I felt kind of spacey and lightheaded, but that could easily have been tiredness or the heat in the afternoon. I tried to keep drinking, but I didn't have much of an appetite again. Late afternoon I had another show, maybe even a little bigger than the previous one! Still no blood in it though, but it encouraged me all the same. I also felt very very crampy and sore under my bump and in the small of my back, and I had to walk about very slowly holding my bump up a bit - it just felt tight and stiff and sore underneath.
As I was breastfeeding Samuel at bedtime last night, I started to have regular BH contractions again, which I could feel very pressurey in my groin, and quite sharply under my bump. Some of them were sharp in my cervix too, so all of the discomfort was VERY encouraging, but the actual contractions I was aware could be just the usual evening bout of BHs. This time I did my best to completely ignore everything, and get on with various activities and move about plenty if I felt like it - change positions and whatnot. TRY to make them go away, and if they didn't then I would maybe pay them more attention. I didn't time them in the slightest.
They obviously did fizzle out but I had them most of the evening - not as frequent or regular as the evening before, I don't think, but then I wasn't paying them much attention.
This morning I woke from a MUCH better sleep! Probably one of the best sleeps I've had in a while actually, which is so nice! My legs were jumpy as I got in bed, but it was my swollen burning feet that prevented me from sleeping again, so after a while of trying to elevate them without success, I went to the bathroom and got a cold wet facecloth and a towel. I balled the towel up on the bed, put my feet on it, and the facecloth on top of my feet, and aimed the fan (on full blast) at my feet. Bliss! I was asleep within probably 15 minutes! :) I did wake at 4.45am for a wee, but other than that I slept right through! When I woke up at 6.45 I rolled over in bed and my lower back seemed to be in a tight painful cramp which made it reeeeeally sore to roll over. I didn't really go back to sleep until Neil came in to wake me at 7.15, but I had a couple of tight BH contractions in that time. Being upright is less sharp and painful under my bump this morning, but my lower back is constantly sore and tight. I wonder if that could just be from bouncing on the birth ball? I am not used to any sort of exercise (unfortunately!) so I think it could just be that...
Kids are going crazy so I will be back later.
Yesterday Neil stayed home all day!!! :) In the morning I had quite a few strong BHs though nothing remotely regular, and I had a SHOW!!! So exciting! It was not a bloody show, so nothing that tells me for sure that labour is on the way imminently, but well enough mucus plug to be a proper show. Neil took the boys to the park in the morning before the heat of the day set in, and then phoned work to say I'd had a show (which occurred while they were out) and decided to take the day as holiday time if labour didn't start. Work have been very good and he hardly has any work to do there at the moment anyway, because they know I'm about to have a baby so they've pretty much cleared his calendar and given him temporary bits and pieces to do. Makes for a bit of a boring time for him there while he waits, but it's easy for him to drop it and go when he needs to without impacting on the work being done, so that's good.
Anyway, such a lovely lovely relief, to know the boys were getting out in the lovely weather. They were right to go out in the morning. It was 82 degrees (28C) in the afternoon and kind of muggy with it, and we all just flaked out wearing as little as possible with the curtains closed to keep the sun out. The air outside was much much warmer than inside, so we had to keep the windows shut too, urgh. NOT a day to give birth!
How I wished I would have a baby yesterday! But when I was trying to rest during the afternoon I realised it was a BAD day to have a homebirth. Baaaad. My bedroom is where I give birth, and it faces south. It's a tiny bedroom and when I'm labouring we keep the door shut. Even with the fan on full-blast and the blackout curtains shut (and window, to keep the hot air out), it was pretty unbearable to try to even rest in, let alone labour and give birth. Today is meant to be a bit cooler, but I'm not sure now. It looks like it's going to get as hot as yesterday to me... Anyway, hot enough for the bedroom to be pretty awful again, so I guess it wouldn't be great to have to try and labour in there again this afternoon. Evenings are obviously better in there with the window open, without the sun on the front of the house, and the mornings have a lovely cool breeze until noon-ish. But it doesn't get comfortable in the bedroom until about 4am! :S We do have an air conditioning unit that we can plug in and hang the hose out of the boys' bedroom window, but if my door is closed for labour and birth then I won't feel the effects of that anyway. We had to switch it on in the end yesterday, and it made the boys' room much more bearable for bedtime.
The night before last (after I last updated) I had SUCH a bad sleep! My RLS was the worst it has been, and even my usual stretches didn't make any difference. I couldn't get cool enough even with the fan on full, 2 feet from the bed, and the window and curtains wide open! The main distraction was that my feet felt really swollen and burning, and I couldn't elevate them properly since I can't lie on my back without feeling lightheaded now my bump is this big and heavy. I just tossed and turned and got up and stretched my legs, and did it all over again, until after 3am. A fox was dragging a bin about in the street for a while which was distracting! ;) I must have dozed off sometime between 3 and 4am, but I woke on the dot of 4am from a fragmented dream as though I had just had a shallow sleep a few minutes long. I had to go for a wee, and then thankfully I went to sleep, but woke at 5.45 and couldn't get back to sleep after that. Ugh! So thankful that Neil was home, but all the times I tried to go to bed and get some sleep, I just couldn't drop off no matter what I tried. My legs went horribly jumpy every time I lay down, or even sat still. In the end when they went out, and I had a show (yay!), I had a bath (trying to keep those quite frequent now, knowing that I could be giving birth soon!) and then pumped up the birth ball which I found at the bottom of my homebirth box. I thought I had lost the plug for it, but I found it in the bedside table drawer, yay!
I sat on the birth ball in my bedroom and bounced while I prayed through the prayers that Heather printed out and laminated for me when I was expecting Benjamin - they are based on the ones at the back of the book "Supernatural Childbirth" and I love them because they're so declarative and faith-based! They soothe me and make me feel more confident about what's ahead, and about my baby and myself being well. One of them is specifically a prayer against fear, which is very apt for me at pretty much all times! After I prayed, I sang some worship songs for a while and bounced some more. It was actually a really lovely time! Then I felt tired out, and tried to rest again, but to no avail. I kept going to the loo and checking but I had no more mucus plug.
Most of the day I felt kind of spacey and lightheaded, but that could easily have been tiredness or the heat in the afternoon. I tried to keep drinking, but I didn't have much of an appetite again. Late afternoon I had another show, maybe even a little bigger than the previous one! Still no blood in it though, but it encouraged me all the same. I also felt very very crampy and sore under my bump and in the small of my back, and I had to walk about very slowly holding my bump up a bit - it just felt tight and stiff and sore underneath.
As I was breastfeeding Samuel at bedtime last night, I started to have regular BH contractions again, which I could feel very pressurey in my groin, and quite sharply under my bump. Some of them were sharp in my cervix too, so all of the discomfort was VERY encouraging, but the actual contractions I was aware could be just the usual evening bout of BHs. This time I did my best to completely ignore everything, and get on with various activities and move about plenty if I felt like it - change positions and whatnot. TRY to make them go away, and if they didn't then I would maybe pay them more attention. I didn't time them in the slightest.
They obviously did fizzle out but I had them most of the evening - not as frequent or regular as the evening before, I don't think, but then I wasn't paying them much attention.
This morning I woke from a MUCH better sleep! Probably one of the best sleeps I've had in a while actually, which is so nice! My legs were jumpy as I got in bed, but it was my swollen burning feet that prevented me from sleeping again, so after a while of trying to elevate them without success, I went to the bathroom and got a cold wet facecloth and a towel. I balled the towel up on the bed, put my feet on it, and the facecloth on top of my feet, and aimed the fan (on full blast) at my feet. Bliss! I was asleep within probably 15 minutes! :) I did wake at 4.45am for a wee, but other than that I slept right through! When I woke up at 6.45 I rolled over in bed and my lower back seemed to be in a tight painful cramp which made it reeeeeally sore to roll over. I didn't really go back to sleep until Neil came in to wake me at 7.15, but I had a couple of tight BH contractions in that time. Being upright is less sharp and painful under my bump this morning, but my lower back is constantly sore and tight. I wonder if that could just be from bouncing on the birth ball? I am not used to any sort of exercise (unfortunately!) so I think it could just be that...
Kids are going crazy so I will be back later.
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
40 weeks pregnant! My due date! :)
Well the day has actually arrived! It's my due date today! And no baby yet. None of the others had (naturally) come by now though, so I shouldn't be too surprised or impatient, but I confess I am already starting to feel a bit impatient. :S
The weather is soooooooo nice! I want to have a baby already! I don't enjoy this kind of anticipation!
I've had no signs of anything today, except a few tiny things to report:
* VERY quiet baby today. When I said he was quiet before, I had no idea! He IS moving, but about half as much as he did on the "quiet" couple of days from before. When he had only had about 3 sessions of movement by the time I was starting to think of making the boys' tea (5pm ish) I got a bit worried. On those quieter days, he still had 8 sessions of movement from when I woke until when I got in bed at night, so to only have 3 by 5pm is definitely not his usual level of activity. Two of those had also just been a single sort of shoulder-shrug/squirm. Heather said I shouldn't be going like 5 or 6 hours without any movement, but his sessions of movement were pretty well spaced out, so maybe 4 hours between each one. Still I was ready to call someone and ask what to do about it. He had just had some movement in the hour or so before that point, so I thought I would get the boys sorted for dinner and bath them, and then Neil would be home and I'd see how things were then. In the couple of hours between then and doing the boys' bedtime routine, he had 3 separate sessions of movement, and was more wiggly than before, so that was really encouraging. He was SO quiet the rest of the day though, goodness! That definitely makes me wonder about it being a pre-labour thing though...
* I haven't had much of an appetite at all today, which - over an entire day - isn't usual for me at all unless I also have IBS at the time, which I haven't. It's not that nothing sounds good, or that I can't decide what to eat. I just don't feel hungry. I was hungry for breakfast as usual, but for the rest of the day I didn't have an appetite even for treats really. I picked at various bits for lunch, and just had cereal and banana and a yoghurt, that kind of thing. I didn't feel unwell at all, just not hungry. I figured I'd get hungry in the afternoon and catch up then, but I didn't. When I gave the boys their tea, I made them fruit salad for pudding, and that looked nice so I had a bit, which went down fine but I didn't really have an appetite for anything more. This evening I haven't had dinner. I just plain haven't felt at all like eating, although not remotely unwell in any way. I'm beginning to think now I should eat something, and there's some vague hunger somewhere in the background, so I'm trying to eat a bowl of granola cereal, which isn't working too well. I kind of want it, but chewing and swallowing is just not feeling that natural, and I'm not hungry. So that makes me wonder as well...
* I have had a lot of CM today. A LOT. I can't call it mucus plug at all really, though I have had the odd tiny bit in with it on occasion. I wear a thin pantyliner these days and this morning had to change it by 9.45am, just a couple of hours after putting it on! I had to change it again by mid-afternoon. It's definitely not anything to do with my waters breaking (I know the difference from my experience with Nathey, and how it should be if that's happened and I sneeze/cough/lie-down, etc. And it's not that), and there's nothing odd about the CM at all, there's just lots of it. I did have a LOT of CM after initially having a show, before contractions even started with Benjamin's labour. I had to change my pad then too, but it wasn't my waters breaking.
* After a day of totally quiet womb, at 8.45pm I was sitting on the sofa checking Facebook and I had a pretty uncomfortable BH contraction. Not unusual. And then another one a few minutes later. And another one a few minutes later, and so on. At 9pm I opened up Contraction Master online so I could just poke a button when one started and see how far apart they were, while carrying on with what I was doing online. I timed them for an hour, and stopped because in the last 20 minutes of that time I was on the phone to my mum, and she eventually suggested getting up and walking about to see if they continued, so I reluctantly did, lol! They seemed to stop. Well, I had one 20 mins later in the kitchen, but nothing else really. My bump was very tight and uncomfy-feeling in between contractions though, so it was sometimes hard to tell when one had gone off or was starting. They didn't hurt at all, just felt tight and uncomfy, and some were a bit pressurey on my cervix. I could totally talk through them, but they distracted me a bit while they were there for the most part. I came back to the sofa before the phone call finished and had a few there, like before.
I think when I relax back into the sofa, that's the position that I most easily have BH contractions in, so that might be why I had so many. They came 2-3 minutes apart for a good while, with the odd 4 or 6 thrown in, and when I was on the phone (before getting up) they were a bit less regular - 4, 10, 7 and 2 minutes apart - and then I got up and they pretty much went off. The nice thing was that Elijah was active the ENTIRE time - over an hour of fairly constant movement, which isn't at all normal for him, but very reassuring for me! :) He changed position after the first few (I hope all this doesn't mean he was distressed by the contractions in any way, hmmm....) in that he rolled his back over to my right side with his little knee up against my left side. I had a constant searing ligament pain in my left side where his limbs were (they're never there on that side so I guess my ligament there isn't used to it!) for about 20 minutes, which was really sore!
Now I've been on the sofa sitting up for nearly an hour since finishing the phone call with my mum, and I have been having BH contractions on and off, but not timing them or focusing on them enough to get a feel for spacing. Elijah is moving at the moment too, so it's like he's making up for the quiet day this evening! ;)
The cereal isn't going down great. My tummy feels like it doesn't want it, so I'm giving up and going to bed. I'm really tired now, but weirdly I have felt very alert and non-sleepy today. I noticed it most obviously when I was breastfeeding Samuel in bed for his nap this morning. I can't remember when I last did that without feeling like I had taken a sleeping pill and having to fight to push past a huuuuuuge wave of sleepy exhaustion. It's so unusual for me NOT to feel that way when I put him down for a nap, that I really noticed it today when I felt as alert and wide awake as anything even after lying next to a dozing baby in a warm quiet bedroom for 10 minutes! Odd! I don't know whether any or all of these little things are "signs" - I guess NONE of them could be, especially if I'm still here in a week's time, lol! I would like to think they are, and if I have a baby tomorrow then I'll be all, "Oh yes, I just knew it because of how quiet he was/alert and not hungry I was/all the CM, etc"! ;) But I just can't know for now. Only time will tell and all that.
My sparkly nail varnish arrived today! I cleaned off all the pink I had previously applied, and set about doing the whole thing afresh with MY preferred shade of pink, hehe! Finishing my toenails off this morning was SUCH a relief! Like, "Ahhhhh, NOW I can go into labour!" ;) Photographic evidence:
Benjamin doesn't like it. He was giving them a very serious stare after lunch and said, "Mummy, I don' like your 'parkly toad." I asked him why not, and he said, "Iss because it looks hobobble." Um, okay then! Not sure what to say to that, but at least he's being honest! ;) The other boys seem to like them though! :) Samuel has tried to lick my toenails several times, hehe! I think he wonders if they're edible! ;) *I'm* very pleased to have girly sparkly toes at last! It's so odd but I really really REALLY needed to have them that way. And they make me smile every time I see them! :) I love the thought of catching sight of them and smiling whilst holding this sweet wiggly little manny in my actual arms sometime soon! :)
I can't think of anything else to report. I have felt a bit light-headed and spacey at times today, especially this evening, but it has been a hot day and maybe I haven't had enough to drink. A couple of times in the day I did make myself sit down at the kitchen table and drink a LARGE glass of water before getting up again, so I think I am getting enough fluids. If not, Neil reminded me that it could be the reason for all the BHs this evening, so yeah. I will have some more water before bed, and hopefully not have to get up too many times in the night for a wee! ;)
I didn't do too well with the boys this afternoon. I phoned Neil around 4pm all tearful because I was absolutely 100% DONE with the children for the day, and couldn't think how on earth to press on for another nanosecond. They were tearing up the living room and leaping about screaming and generally not being at all safe around Samuel (who was joining in and loving it, but not all that safe nonetheless!), and I was feeling very down on myself for not being able to get them out in this gorgeous weather (again). I felt so tired and hormonal suddenly at that moment, and just wanted to go upstairs and close the bedroom door behind me and lie on my bed until Neil got home (3 hours later, so um, not happening!). I also had no idea what to give them for dinner. I wanted rescuing! But it couldn't happen, so it was a moment of upsetness in general. After I spoke/vented to Neil, I separated the boys a bit and had them tidy up the living room. I got cross with them at first though, ugh. Then with them separated, things got a lot more calm and I was able to pull myself together again. Oooh, strong Braxton Hicks! My whole bump has morphed into a weird shape, lol! :)
Neil told me to just give them beans on toast for dinner, so I did, with some cheese and salad, and they asked for fruit salad afterwards so I ended up making that too, and it was fine. A nice sense of accomplishment actually, after the afternoon I'd had! It felt nice to make something healthy for them to enjoy from scratch without it being a huge ordeal, like I'd DONE something for them, you know? I have been feeling like I'm not doing anything much for them lately. Just something little like that helped. After dinner I decided to give them all a bath. They don't have baths very often really, but when the weather warms up we do it more often. I remembered seeing in Heather's notes on Samuel's birth that we had bathed the boys the day before he was born, and I suddenly thought that would be a good thing to get "done" - it's easier with two parents, to bath five little boys, than when I am flaked out in bed recovering from giving birth and the boys NEED a bath and Neil has to do the lot of them by himself! Also I sort of had it in my mind to try and do all the things that could possibly make me feel like there was nothing left "undone" and maybe (yes, I know I'm grasping at straws!) that could pave the way to getting labour started or something?! So I started their bathtime and Neil got home from work as I was starting it, which was great timing to help! :)
So my nails are sparkly, the boys are freshly bathed and hair-washed, the bedroom is ready for a homebirth, my bag is packed, the baby clothes are all sweetly folded in the dresser drawers, my due date has officially come, I did some baking (but still haven't done fairy cakes or flapjacks, hmmm. The urge isn't really there the same now, though).... So SURELY that's it in terms of my hormonal need to have certain things ready/done this time around?! I really do not look forward to labour! I feel a sense of nervousness at the idea that it might be starting soon, a real butterflies in my tummy sort of feeling! I am NOT looking forward to the ordeal! But ohhhh the reward! I am trying to keep my eyes on the prize, because it's an amazing one, and I can't WAIT for that part! I hope it's soooooon, despite the not wanting it to be, because otherwise the time drags on and it becomes harder, and the waiting sucks, and I get more huge and uncomfy, etc. It has to happen anyway! I would prefer it to be SOONER now!
Tomorrow is by far my favourite day out of all the ones ahead, to have my little baby boy. It's Thursday 24th. A nice looking date for a birthday! Mandi is working tomorrow. It's as soon as soon can be. It's feasible with my history. He'd be in my arms in such a wonderfully short time from now! I wouldn't have the huge ordeal of waiting and waiting into next week and contemplating further appointments and a sweep and the general yuck/discomfort that comes from that procedure alone. The only downside at all is that Heather would probably prefer ANY date but that one, since it's her daughter's birthday. I feel so bad for thinking selfishly, knowing that, but OH HOW I WANT IT TO BE TOMORROW ANYWAY!!!! :/ I want tomorrow even more than I've wanted any of the previous days or today. If nothing happens tomorrow I think I will find it hard, even though that's kind of silly. Because Mandi will be off work until Monday, which feels like forever away. And I'll know I could be waiting ages, the beautiful weather will continue while I sit useless at home with the boys, and of course next week it looks set to break and get "unsettled" again, urgh. I kept looking out of the window today at the vibrant green trees and the blue blue sky and sunshine, and feeling the gorgeous warm breeze coming in, and the summery smell everywhere, and thinking what perfect weather this is to be born into! What a lovely day for a baby to be born, perfect weather in late May - how lovely! I wish I could have him on one of these gorgeous days, which look set to continue until Sunday, for now.
Well, I think I will go to bed now. It's getting late and I feel ever so tired now. Not many BHs going on, but I do feel very tight and sore in my lower back and a little bit the same under my bump low in the front as well right now. It's not to do with contractions, it's just constant, and much more bothersome when I stand up or walk about. Maybe I overdid it lifting a big basket of laundry to put away today? I wondered if I should have done that! But I think it's fairly new just recently, so maybe not. Anyway, I will go to bed, and hopefully - oh hopefully! - I will have some sign in the morning that mayyyybe labour isn't too far off. Neil says he is thinking of staying home in the morning (slightly naughtily) and taking the boys out to the park to let me rest and gather my head a bit, and then if nothing is happening in the afternoon to go into work for the rest of the day. I want even more to have a sign of some sort in the morning, so that he can at least honestly report to work that there's possibly something happening! But the thought of him being home in the morning and getting those precious boys out in the sunshine and air for a few hours is unbelievably blissful and relieving to me right now.
I will update tomorrow in any case, but probably earlier in the day if there's anything to report. Otherwise the usual evening bulletin! ;) Thanks for being along for the ride!
The weather is soooooooo nice! I want to have a baby already! I don't enjoy this kind of anticipation!
I've had no signs of anything today, except a few tiny things to report:
* VERY quiet baby today. When I said he was quiet before, I had no idea! He IS moving, but about half as much as he did on the "quiet" couple of days from before. When he had only had about 3 sessions of movement by the time I was starting to think of making the boys' tea (5pm ish) I got a bit worried. On those quieter days, he still had 8 sessions of movement from when I woke until when I got in bed at night, so to only have 3 by 5pm is definitely not his usual level of activity. Two of those had also just been a single sort of shoulder-shrug/squirm. Heather said I shouldn't be going like 5 or 6 hours without any movement, but his sessions of movement were pretty well spaced out, so maybe 4 hours between each one. Still I was ready to call someone and ask what to do about it. He had just had some movement in the hour or so before that point, so I thought I would get the boys sorted for dinner and bath them, and then Neil would be home and I'd see how things were then. In the couple of hours between then and doing the boys' bedtime routine, he had 3 separate sessions of movement, and was more wiggly than before, so that was really encouraging. He was SO quiet the rest of the day though, goodness! That definitely makes me wonder about it being a pre-labour thing though...
* I haven't had much of an appetite at all today, which - over an entire day - isn't usual for me at all unless I also have IBS at the time, which I haven't. It's not that nothing sounds good, or that I can't decide what to eat. I just don't feel hungry. I was hungry for breakfast as usual, but for the rest of the day I didn't have an appetite even for treats really. I picked at various bits for lunch, and just had cereal and banana and a yoghurt, that kind of thing. I didn't feel unwell at all, just not hungry. I figured I'd get hungry in the afternoon and catch up then, but I didn't. When I gave the boys their tea, I made them fruit salad for pudding, and that looked nice so I had a bit, which went down fine but I didn't really have an appetite for anything more. This evening I haven't had dinner. I just plain haven't felt at all like eating, although not remotely unwell in any way. I'm beginning to think now I should eat something, and there's some vague hunger somewhere in the background, so I'm trying to eat a bowl of granola cereal, which isn't working too well. I kind of want it, but chewing and swallowing is just not feeling that natural, and I'm not hungry. So that makes me wonder as well...
* I have had a lot of CM today. A LOT. I can't call it mucus plug at all really, though I have had the odd tiny bit in with it on occasion. I wear a thin pantyliner these days and this morning had to change it by 9.45am, just a couple of hours after putting it on! I had to change it again by mid-afternoon. It's definitely not anything to do with my waters breaking (I know the difference from my experience with Nathey, and how it should be if that's happened and I sneeze/cough/lie-down, etc. And it's not that), and there's nothing odd about the CM at all, there's just lots of it. I did have a LOT of CM after initially having a show, before contractions even started with Benjamin's labour. I had to change my pad then too, but it wasn't my waters breaking.
* After a day of totally quiet womb, at 8.45pm I was sitting on the sofa checking Facebook and I had a pretty uncomfortable BH contraction. Not unusual. And then another one a few minutes later. And another one a few minutes later, and so on. At 9pm I opened up Contraction Master online so I could just poke a button when one started and see how far apart they were, while carrying on with what I was doing online. I timed them for an hour, and stopped because in the last 20 minutes of that time I was on the phone to my mum, and she eventually suggested getting up and walking about to see if they continued, so I reluctantly did, lol! They seemed to stop. Well, I had one 20 mins later in the kitchen, but nothing else really. My bump was very tight and uncomfy-feeling in between contractions though, so it was sometimes hard to tell when one had gone off or was starting. They didn't hurt at all, just felt tight and uncomfy, and some were a bit pressurey on my cervix. I could totally talk through them, but they distracted me a bit while they were there for the most part. I came back to the sofa before the phone call finished and had a few there, like before.
I think when I relax back into the sofa, that's the position that I most easily have BH contractions in, so that might be why I had so many. They came 2-3 minutes apart for a good while, with the odd 4 or 6 thrown in, and when I was on the phone (before getting up) they were a bit less regular - 4, 10, 7 and 2 minutes apart - and then I got up and they pretty much went off. The nice thing was that Elijah was active the ENTIRE time - over an hour of fairly constant movement, which isn't at all normal for him, but very reassuring for me! :) He changed position after the first few (I hope all this doesn't mean he was distressed by the contractions in any way, hmmm....) in that he rolled his back over to my right side with his little knee up against my left side. I had a constant searing ligament pain in my left side where his limbs were (they're never there on that side so I guess my ligament there isn't used to it!) for about 20 minutes, which was really sore!
Now I've been on the sofa sitting up for nearly an hour since finishing the phone call with my mum, and I have been having BH contractions on and off, but not timing them or focusing on them enough to get a feel for spacing. Elijah is moving at the moment too, so it's like he's making up for the quiet day this evening! ;)
The cereal isn't going down great. My tummy feels like it doesn't want it, so I'm giving up and going to bed. I'm really tired now, but weirdly I have felt very alert and non-sleepy today. I noticed it most obviously when I was breastfeeding Samuel in bed for his nap this morning. I can't remember when I last did that without feeling like I had taken a sleeping pill and having to fight to push past a huuuuuuge wave of sleepy exhaustion. It's so unusual for me NOT to feel that way when I put him down for a nap, that I really noticed it today when I felt as alert and wide awake as anything even after lying next to a dozing baby in a warm quiet bedroom for 10 minutes! Odd! I don't know whether any or all of these little things are "signs" - I guess NONE of them could be, especially if I'm still here in a week's time, lol! I would like to think they are, and if I have a baby tomorrow then I'll be all, "Oh yes, I just knew it because of how quiet he was/alert and not hungry I was/all the CM, etc"! ;) But I just can't know for now. Only time will tell and all that.
My sparkly nail varnish arrived today! I cleaned off all the pink I had previously applied, and set about doing the whole thing afresh with MY preferred shade of pink, hehe! Finishing my toenails off this morning was SUCH a relief! Like, "Ahhhhh, NOW I can go into labour!" ;) Photographic evidence:
Benjamin doesn't like it. He was giving them a very serious stare after lunch and said, "Mummy, I don' like your 'parkly toad." I asked him why not, and he said, "Iss because it looks hobobble." Um, okay then! Not sure what to say to that, but at least he's being honest! ;) The other boys seem to like them though! :) Samuel has tried to lick my toenails several times, hehe! I think he wonders if they're edible! ;) *I'm* very pleased to have girly sparkly toes at last! It's so odd but I really really REALLY needed to have them that way. And they make me smile every time I see them! :) I love the thought of catching sight of them and smiling whilst holding this sweet wiggly little manny in my actual arms sometime soon! :)
I can't think of anything else to report. I have felt a bit light-headed and spacey at times today, especially this evening, but it has been a hot day and maybe I haven't had enough to drink. A couple of times in the day I did make myself sit down at the kitchen table and drink a LARGE glass of water before getting up again, so I think I am getting enough fluids. If not, Neil reminded me that it could be the reason for all the BHs this evening, so yeah. I will have some more water before bed, and hopefully not have to get up too many times in the night for a wee! ;)
I didn't do too well with the boys this afternoon. I phoned Neil around 4pm all tearful because I was absolutely 100% DONE with the children for the day, and couldn't think how on earth to press on for another nanosecond. They were tearing up the living room and leaping about screaming and generally not being at all safe around Samuel (who was joining in and loving it, but not all that safe nonetheless!), and I was feeling very down on myself for not being able to get them out in this gorgeous weather (again). I felt so tired and hormonal suddenly at that moment, and just wanted to go upstairs and close the bedroom door behind me and lie on my bed until Neil got home (3 hours later, so um, not happening!). I also had no idea what to give them for dinner. I wanted rescuing! But it couldn't happen, so it was a moment of upsetness in general. After I spoke/vented to Neil, I separated the boys a bit and had them tidy up the living room. I got cross with them at first though, ugh. Then with them separated, things got a lot more calm and I was able to pull myself together again. Oooh, strong Braxton Hicks! My whole bump has morphed into a weird shape, lol! :)
Neil told me to just give them beans on toast for dinner, so I did, with some cheese and salad, and they asked for fruit salad afterwards so I ended up making that too, and it was fine. A nice sense of accomplishment actually, after the afternoon I'd had! It felt nice to make something healthy for them to enjoy from scratch without it being a huge ordeal, like I'd DONE something for them, you know? I have been feeling like I'm not doing anything much for them lately. Just something little like that helped. After dinner I decided to give them all a bath. They don't have baths very often really, but when the weather warms up we do it more often. I remembered seeing in Heather's notes on Samuel's birth that we had bathed the boys the day before he was born, and I suddenly thought that would be a good thing to get "done" - it's easier with two parents, to bath five little boys, than when I am flaked out in bed recovering from giving birth and the boys NEED a bath and Neil has to do the lot of them by himself! Also I sort of had it in my mind to try and do all the things that could possibly make me feel like there was nothing left "undone" and maybe (yes, I know I'm grasping at straws!) that could pave the way to getting labour started or something?! So I started their bathtime and Neil got home from work as I was starting it, which was great timing to help! :)
So my nails are sparkly, the boys are freshly bathed and hair-washed, the bedroom is ready for a homebirth, my bag is packed, the baby clothes are all sweetly folded in the dresser drawers, my due date has officially come, I did some baking (but still haven't done fairy cakes or flapjacks, hmmm. The urge isn't really there the same now, though).... So SURELY that's it in terms of my hormonal need to have certain things ready/done this time around?! I really do not look forward to labour! I feel a sense of nervousness at the idea that it might be starting soon, a real butterflies in my tummy sort of feeling! I am NOT looking forward to the ordeal! But ohhhh the reward! I am trying to keep my eyes on the prize, because it's an amazing one, and I can't WAIT for that part! I hope it's soooooon, despite the not wanting it to be, because otherwise the time drags on and it becomes harder, and the waiting sucks, and I get more huge and uncomfy, etc. It has to happen anyway! I would prefer it to be SOONER now!
Tomorrow is by far my favourite day out of all the ones ahead, to have my little baby boy. It's Thursday 24th. A nice looking date for a birthday! Mandi is working tomorrow. It's as soon as soon can be. It's feasible with my history. He'd be in my arms in such a wonderfully short time from now! I wouldn't have the huge ordeal of waiting and waiting into next week and contemplating further appointments and a sweep and the general yuck/discomfort that comes from that procedure alone. The only downside at all is that Heather would probably prefer ANY date but that one, since it's her daughter's birthday. I feel so bad for thinking selfishly, knowing that, but OH HOW I WANT IT TO BE TOMORROW ANYWAY!!!! :/ I want tomorrow even more than I've wanted any of the previous days or today. If nothing happens tomorrow I think I will find it hard, even though that's kind of silly. Because Mandi will be off work until Monday, which feels like forever away. And I'll know I could be waiting ages, the beautiful weather will continue while I sit useless at home with the boys, and of course next week it looks set to break and get "unsettled" again, urgh. I kept looking out of the window today at the vibrant green trees and the blue blue sky and sunshine, and feeling the gorgeous warm breeze coming in, and the summery smell everywhere, and thinking what perfect weather this is to be born into! What a lovely day for a baby to be born, perfect weather in late May - how lovely! I wish I could have him on one of these gorgeous days, which look set to continue until Sunday, for now.
Well, I think I will go to bed now. It's getting late and I feel ever so tired now. Not many BHs going on, but I do feel very tight and sore in my lower back and a little bit the same under my bump low in the front as well right now. It's not to do with contractions, it's just constant, and much more bothersome when I stand up or walk about. Maybe I overdid it lifting a big basket of laundry to put away today? I wondered if I should have done that! But I think it's fairly new just recently, so maybe not. Anyway, I will go to bed, and hopefully - oh hopefully! - I will have some sign in the morning that mayyyybe labour isn't too far off. Neil says he is thinking of staying home in the morning (slightly naughtily) and taking the boys out to the park to let me rest and gather my head a bit, and then if nothing is happening in the afternoon to go into work for the rest of the day. I want even more to have a sign of some sort in the morning, so that he can at least honestly report to work that there's possibly something happening! But the thought of him being home in the morning and getting those precious boys out in the sunshine and air for a few hours is unbelievably blissful and relieving to me right now.
I will update tomorrow in any case, but probably earlier in the day if there's anything to report. Otherwise the usual evening bulletin! ;) Thanks for being along for the ride!
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
39 weeks, 6 days
Just thought I'd update to say what's going on right now, which is....
NADA.
Due date tomorrow! I can't believe I'm starting to feel impatient and that "I'm NEVER going to have this baby!" feeling already - I'm not even due until tomorrow and NONE of my babies have come naturally before my due date! Silly woman!
Everything is boringly quiet in the womb department today - not really that crampy or anything like I was yesterday, and NO mucus plug bits at all today, whereas I lost little bits all day long yesterday! Very tired today and just want to sleep, but my basic energy levels aren't bad. Have managed housework to some degree and been more in-the-moment with the boys today (less irritable I think) than yesterday. Also managed to be sane and responsible about dinner today too! ;)
Fed up that it's becoming hot and lovely weather - partly because it's getting too hot for comfort already and JUST as I'm about to have a baby! But mostly because it's gorgeous out and I simply CANNOT take the boys out - I'm just completely unable at this stage, and we have no useable garden, so we are literally stuck inside a tiny house with 5 little boys all day long, every day, in this gorgeous weather! :( I am so fed up and sad about it. We don't live within walking distance of anywhere - smelly main road with rubbish narrow pavements that I am not able to push the tandem pushchair on even - and I am physically unable now to lift little ones into high-up car seats in the van without injuring myself. Ugh. I WISH I would go into labour so that Neil stays home and can bless those little boys with hours upon hours outside in this lovely weather, every day, for as long as it lasts!
The one really good thing is that my set of pink nail varnish arrived today! :) The sparkly one hasn't yet, but I'm reeeally hoping it will tomorrow. I just will feel "ready" when my toenails are pink AND sparkly, for some crazy reason, lol! I already painted them pink today, under much scrutiny from the boys and unsolicited advice from Arthur! He didn't think the shade I chose showed up enough, and reckoned I should paint alternate toenails different shades, etc. He was quite bossy! I couldn't decide so have painted a darker shade first and then a more pearly pink one on top, but I'm not sure if I like it enough so may just take it off and do what *I* wanted to in the first place, while Arthur is in bed this time, hehe! Nathey loves my pink girly toenails, and keeps saying how pretty they are - he is the same when I wear dresses and skirts, and always tells me he likes me wearing those things (none of the others comment on what I wear, so it's unique to Nathan!).
Oh I had the most WONDERFUL news!! My brother phoned to see how I was doing, and to tell us that he and Sarah are expecting another baby!!!! They have Thea, who turned 5 last week, and Rasmus who is 2, and baby #3 is due in November! So very thrilled and excited for them, and somehow it's extra special to me that they are choosing to have more than the "average" number of kids - more than any of our own family members have ever had (allllll my family are either an only child, or one of two siblings, and think it's nuts to have more than 2). I'm pretty sure they have never had any plans to go beyond 3 children, and I know they've thought about a third baby since expecting the 2nd. I'm just so excited! That makes 9 grandchildren so far for my parents, who only had two children themselves! I think they are SO blessed to have such fruit, and they do love their grandchildren but I wish they were more exuberant and obviously grateful than they tend to be at the thought of a new one on the way. I really hope that Neil and I are blessed with literally dozens of grandchildren - that would be so incredible and lovely! Many large families who allow God to control their fertility/family size have children who grow up to live out the same in their families (not that I presume the boys WOULD, but some might...), and if so we could be blessed with ever so many grandchildren. I would want to be as involved as possible with my little grands! Such a lovely thought for the future... :)
But for now, the present! :) Hopefully I will have this sweet baby boy soon, but there's absolutely nothing to report for now. I'll update again tomorrow, probably! Thanks for the comments, it's always so much fun at the end with the suspense and excitement, and I'm grateful that there are some friends out there keeping me company in that! :)
NADA.
Due date tomorrow! I can't believe I'm starting to feel impatient and that "I'm NEVER going to have this baby!" feeling already - I'm not even due until tomorrow and NONE of my babies have come naturally before my due date! Silly woman!
Everything is boringly quiet in the womb department today - not really that crampy or anything like I was yesterday, and NO mucus plug bits at all today, whereas I lost little bits all day long yesterday! Very tired today and just want to sleep, but my basic energy levels aren't bad. Have managed housework to some degree and been more in-the-moment with the boys today (less irritable I think) than yesterday. Also managed to be sane and responsible about dinner today too! ;)
Fed up that it's becoming hot and lovely weather - partly because it's getting too hot for comfort already and JUST as I'm about to have a baby! But mostly because it's gorgeous out and I simply CANNOT take the boys out - I'm just completely unable at this stage, and we have no useable garden, so we are literally stuck inside a tiny house with 5 little boys all day long, every day, in this gorgeous weather! :( I am so fed up and sad about it. We don't live within walking distance of anywhere - smelly main road with rubbish narrow pavements that I am not able to push the tandem pushchair on even - and I am physically unable now to lift little ones into high-up car seats in the van without injuring myself. Ugh. I WISH I would go into labour so that Neil stays home and can bless those little boys with hours upon hours outside in this lovely weather, every day, for as long as it lasts!
The one really good thing is that my set of pink nail varnish arrived today! :) The sparkly one hasn't yet, but I'm reeeally hoping it will tomorrow. I just will feel "ready" when my toenails are pink AND sparkly, for some crazy reason, lol! I already painted them pink today, under much scrutiny from the boys and unsolicited advice from Arthur! He didn't think the shade I chose showed up enough, and reckoned I should paint alternate toenails different shades, etc. He was quite bossy! I couldn't decide so have painted a darker shade first and then a more pearly pink one on top, but I'm not sure if I like it enough so may just take it off and do what *I* wanted to in the first place, while Arthur is in bed this time, hehe! Nathey loves my pink girly toenails, and keeps saying how pretty they are - he is the same when I wear dresses and skirts, and always tells me he likes me wearing those things (none of the others comment on what I wear, so it's unique to Nathan!).
Oh I had the most WONDERFUL news!! My brother phoned to see how I was doing, and to tell us that he and Sarah are expecting another baby!!!! They have Thea, who turned 5 last week, and Rasmus who is 2, and baby #3 is due in November! So very thrilled and excited for them, and somehow it's extra special to me that they are choosing to have more than the "average" number of kids - more than any of our own family members have ever had (allllll my family are either an only child, or one of two siblings, and think it's nuts to have more than 2). I'm pretty sure they have never had any plans to go beyond 3 children, and I know they've thought about a third baby since expecting the 2nd. I'm just so excited! That makes 9 grandchildren so far for my parents, who only had two children themselves! I think they are SO blessed to have such fruit, and they do love their grandchildren but I wish they were more exuberant and obviously grateful than they tend to be at the thought of a new one on the way. I really hope that Neil and I are blessed with literally dozens of grandchildren - that would be so incredible and lovely! Many large families who allow God to control their fertility/family size have children who grow up to live out the same in their families (not that I presume the boys WOULD, but some might...), and if so we could be blessed with ever so many grandchildren. I would want to be as involved as possible with my little grands! Such a lovely thought for the future... :)
But for now, the present! :) Hopefully I will have this sweet baby boy soon, but there's absolutely nothing to report for now. I'll update again tomorrow, probably! Thanks for the comments, it's always so much fun at the end with the suspense and excitement, and I'm grateful that there are some friends out there keeping me company in that! :)
Monday, May 21, 2012
39 weeks, 5 days
Almost at that magical date that the entire pregnancy has hinged upon! May 23rd 2012. Wednesday. The day after tomorrow. Regardless of when my little man actually turns up, I have officially ARRIVED at baby time! :) So exciting. And terrifying. And wonderous! All at once!
As usual I should be getting in bed instead of updating my blog, so I will TRY to be brief! ;)
Mandi, my favourite midwife, came round today. And Jackie (the head of community midwives) phoned me this morning to catch up on how everything is going - so nice! :) It's a couple of days early, but today was my due date antenatal appointment. I declined a sweep - don't want to mess with that unless I'm 41 weeks and having the threat of induction waved in my general direction. There's too much added risk with Group B Strep anyway, and thankfully Mandi was of the same mind about it.
Everything looks fine - my blood pressure was 116/68 and my urine was totally fine. Mandi could feel straight away that Elijah has grown when she felt him through my tummy. He's lying in the position he's always in - back along my left side, feet against my right side (LOA), and his head was 4/5 palpable still. He's in there, but still quite high. Benjamin was that high at least in early labour, and Mandi reminded me that he may not go down any further until some good contractions move him there during labour! She measured my bump as 37 weeks, but she's fine with that since I had a scan and it showed he is growing.
Mandi is working tomorrow (Tuesday), Thursday this week, and then not again until Monday. She's also doing Tuesday and Thursday next week. Gestationally for me those dates would be 39+6, 40+1 (Benjamin was born then), 40+5 (she's booked me in for my 41 week appointment that day if I haven't had the baby by then), 40+6 (which will be the day after a probable sweep, which has so far brought me a baby the next day the two other times I've had it done), and 41+1 (around Samuel and Matthew's gestational arrival). Mandi has delivered Samuel and Benjamin, and Heather and I are praying praying PRAYING that I will give birth on a day that she is working again! She only works three days a week (no nights), so it's not that likely, but then God answered these same prayers last time, even though she was barely working at all over the time I was due! :) I would LOVE to have her with me during labour and to deliver Elijah as well. I am not sure if I would otherwise get a midwife that I like and who would be as sensitive and understanding as Mandi, and definitely not one that I know so well, so I would reeeeally like it to be Mandi! Thursday this week isn't the best day for Heather because it's her daughter's 14th birthday. She and her daughter have agreed that she would come anyway if I went into labour that day, but it would just be nicer for her to be with her family rather than with me I think!
I am hoping (without a TON of confidence) not to be waiting until next week! 41 weeks pregnant is comparatively WAY less fun than 40 weeks pregnant, lol! I would rather give birth before that point this time! I have done so twice though - both starting with really obvious shows and labour right after. Arthur's was at 40+2 (though he didn't actually arrive until 2 days later), and Benjamin's the day after my due date. It occurred to me that Arthur and Benjamin are SO similar in personality (and a bunch of other things, including looks!), and Matthew and Samuel are my calmer, easy-going boys with a TON of similarities, who both kept me waiting until I'd had a sweep at 41 weeks! ;) I have no idea what Nathey would have done if my waters hadn't broken at 35 weeks. He's fairly easy going so maybe he would have waited longer, and I wonder if that's a reason why my assertive, more fretty children gave off their "please get me out of here" hormone which in turn triggered my body to begin labour (so clever how that works!) earlier than that laid-back pair who were happy staying put for as long as I'd let them! ;) With that in mind, Elijah seems to me to be a very laid-back baby (from what I can tell so far), and if my theory is right, wouldn't that make him the type to stay put until a sweep started things off at 41+ weeks?! I hope he'll come sooner though!!
The midwife asked if I had had any early signs yet. I have had a few little things here and there, but those could easily mean not-a-lot other than just the usual "gearing up" thing that can go on for about as long as a piece of string, if you know what I mean! Any day now.... or not! ;)
I have been very crampy today, low front and back. That's usual for me at 39 weeks, regardless of when the baby arrives, so I'm not putting much on that. I feel like I am very uncomfortably constipated alllll the time, which maybe I am to some degree, but I am suspicious that a bony little head pressed against my bowel is at least part of the reason for that feeling at this stage! I remember trying to go to the loo like 5 times during the morning on the day that Benjamin was born (after the show, but before contractions started). I just felt so backed-up and uncomfortable, but couldn't really do anything, and it was very distracting. I feel like that today, but again, it doesn't mean I'm ABOUT to go into labour, particularly.
I am also losing little bits of mucus plug today every time I go to the toilet. Sounds more exciting than it is - it's really just LITTLE bits, and that can be normal for ages before labour begins. If any of it was blood-stained, that would be a very different situation, but none of it is. I keep checking! :)
The other thing is that Elijah has been a bit quiet yesterday and today. Yesterday he was quite a bit less active than normal, although still moving the same number of "sessions" - just the odd kick here and there for them though, and I just got a feeling of him being the opposite of active in there, in general. This morning when I woke up, he wasn't wiggling about (not that he always is) and I suddenly got really nervous because although I knew he was moving before I went to sleep, I was nervous about the quietness in there. I got my doppler out at 6.45am and listened in. It took forever to get the wonky battery thingy working (it's a bit broken but still works eventually!) and in that time I got REALLY anxious about him, having felt his position which usually gets him wiggly, but he was totally not moving. Thankfully the thing started working and I heard his happy little heartbeat. He started to move a bit as well while I was listening, and it was encouraging to hear accelerations in his heart rate as he moved and stuff. I listened in for a good 5 minutes or so, and then put the doppler away and tried to get a bit more sleep (didn't succeed unfortunately!). But I was glad that he was okay. I spoke to Heather on the phone during the morning before the midwife came, about various things, but I mentioned his activity levels, and she said I could mention it to the midwife if I was concerned, but it sounded like he was moving plenty, just more "quietly" than before. In her experience that sounded like a pre-labour sign, and I remembered the same thing had happened with Benjamin. He was so quiet the day or two before he was born. I even wrote here that I went to bed on my due date and lay awake anxious about his quietness (though he was still moving, like Elijah is now, just not as vigorously or often), and said to God aloud, "Lord, I'm nervous about Benjamin's lack of movement..." or something like that, and INSTANTLY he began wiggling about really vigorously and kept it up for a while! It was such a relief! He was born the next day :)
I did tell Mandi about it, and she said that as long as he's having 10 sessions of movement per day and keeping to his norms in that way (he has had 8 sessions so far today, some quite wiggly, others just a few quieter movements - he usually has exactly 10 by the time I get in bed, so I think he's pretty much on track still), I do not need to worry about it, but if I'm not sure, or if it makes me anxious and I want reassurance, I can call them and have him checked at Day Assessment. So that's good to know. She also said exactly what Heather said, that in her experience he's probably gearing up for labour and birth pretty soon, if he's having a quiet couple of days - the calm before the storm, she described it as! ;)
So all those little signs together ARE rather exciting, but with my history of having little exciting signs here and there and then STILL waiting at 41 weeks, I don't want to let myself think about it too much and start wondering if it might be very soon. Because then if/when it doesn't happen for ages yet, I will become super-duperly frustrated and fed-up! ;) That part in itself is no fun, so I would rather stay as carefree about it as possible for as long as I can manage to!
Today is Monday and Neil is back to work after the weekend. Yesterday I had the craziest thing happen. It was like a food craving. I HAD to paint my toenails. I don't think I've ever felt that before, or at least not in recent pregnancies and not that I can remember anyway. But I HAD to paint my toenails, and what's more I had to paint them pink and sparkly - very girly! ;) But I don't have any nail polish!! I never really do that kind of thing so I don't have any. I did once have sparkly nail polish, and it might even be in the loft, but it has probably been nearly 10 years since I painted my toenails and even if I could find the stuff (which, trust me, is an impossibility in our horribly cluttered loft!) it would probably be all congealed or dried up by now. Anyway, this weird craving-type-thing was all-consuming! So strange for me! When I wrote about it at Facebook, quite a few people commented that they painted their toenails (or had the urge to) right before labour started, which I hadn't even considered until I saw all their comments, and I found it very interesting! Time will tell whether that's why I'm desperate to paint my toenails, I guess!
In the absence of nail polish, I shaved my legs and clipped my nails (not awfully easy when this pregnant, but I managed!), and moisturised my legs and feet. I never do this! I mean, obviously I cut my toenails, lol! But I shave my legs pretty rarely, unless it's summer (which it hasn't been at all yet, but that looks set to change this week, urrrgh - overly warm weather just in time for me to give birth, boo! I would much have preferred to be giving birth in the cool fresh rainy weather we've had for aaaages!), and NEVER moisturise. But even so, the urge to have girly sparkly toenails continued, and in the end I went on Amazon late last night and used some birthday money to order a set of various pink nail polishes, and a separate sparkly one. I put them on express delivery, haha! They've been dispatched today, and I'm absolutely LONGING for them to arrive tomorrow - that would be the soonest they could possibly arrive. The pink set might arrive first, because the feedback is great for fast delivery for that seller, but less so for the sparkly nail polish seller. If so, I will paint my toenails pink when the pink stuff arrives, and just add a sparkly layer over the top when it gets here! :) It's such a crazy feeling - I honestly feel like I CANNOT go into labour until I have pink sparkly toes. Seriously. I also need to bake a few things before I can start producing oxytocin, haha! Noteably (sp?!) chocolate refridgerator cake (made this morning!), double batch of flapjacks (less than a double batch is a pointless task in our household of flapjack-loving boys, and even that disappears in a day or two), and a batch of iced fairy cakes. I made lemon fairy cakes (these are basically cupcakes, in case anyone is wondering, but smaller and without a ton of buttercream on the top - just glace (water) icing instead) with the boys last week and then went in a flash, so I need to make more! Maybe plain instead of lemon this time, although the lemon was lovely! Anyway, I digress! And I'm supposed to be going to bed!!! Baking is usually a good pre-labour sign for me too, although I have been having bouts of that for months now, so who knows.
Well, I had better go to bed. I am still not sleeping great, but my best success at the moment is to get up and spend 5 minutes stretching out my various leg muscles - feels like it takes AGES in the dark bedroom, but it's worth it. I usually fall asleep within 30 minutes of doing that, whereas I might have already been awake for hours, so it's a big improvement. I am going to try it before I even get in bed tonight, as I'm really really really tired out and can't run the risk of a few hours of sleep after not being able to get to sleep for a while. I have had more energy today to do housework and such, than I have for a while. I have cleaned a bit in the bathroom today, and done various post-weekend catch-up chores in the kitchen, re. laundry and the floor, but my lower back aches for it, I think, tonight. I can focus (and WANT to focus) on housework really well, but I can't seem to focus on the boys much at all. I have little patience and their noise is unbearably distracting. I am finding it makes me feel fidgetty and irritable to sit with them and play and snuggle and stuff - which is sad! :( I do it anyway, but I am much more "sane" busying about the house doing nesty stuff. I guess it's hormonal and normal, but I don't like the feeling of finding my children's company irritating! I also can't for the LIFE of me get my head round simple stuff like meal preparation, or responding to "Mummy, I'm bored!" like I normally can. I just have fluff for brains, and the more I sit and squeeze them, the more ridiculously absent any useful thought is, and I actually start feeling panicky and tearful about it after a while. It sounds daft but I could. not. manage. to put dinner on the table tonight. I just couldn't think of anything, even though there's food in the cupboards and I could see it there. I just couldn't think what to make, or who would actually eat it, or anything. I tried sitting and concentrating on it, and pulling myself together for an HOUR, but was constantly interrupted by kids arguing, or having done a poo, or getting stuck and screaming, or "He took my toy!" or "He hit me on purpose!! Yes you did!! Yes you DID!!! YES YOU DIIIIIID!!!! (thwack)" I about wanted to scream, and I couldn't get anywhere on the food front!! I felt upset that Neil would be coming home AGAIN at a time when I should have the boys ready to go to bed, not running riot around the house, unfed and totally nowhere near ready for bed, at the end of a hard day's work! :S
So, Neil came home just as I was serving cereal and toast for dinner. *sigh* And the boys went to bed soooo late. I hope I can sort it out tomorrow. It's getting really hard to manage the days, even if I have energy and "know" what I need to do - I can't seem to actually DO it by the end of the day. By halfway through the day even if it's a GOOD day, I really feel quite desperate to have a break, to be able to get away upstairs and rest or focus on what every fibre of my being is wanting to do - the arrival of my baby and the psychological and practical preparations. I can't seem to be in the moment any longer with the usual daily stuff and the children. I wish someone could help me with the boys so I could take those apparently necessary breaks at this pre-labour stage of pregnancy. I have no choice so I DO it all the same, but I'm struggling a bit. That's a MAJOR reason for me, not to want to wait the whole of this week before giving birth (or worse, into next week!). I know that it gets more difficult day by day as 41 weeks arrives, and I am already finding it difficult. I think I just need to have a baby now. I am nervous about the scale of the event, when it happens! But I really just want to have it behind me now, the hormones and hugeness, and my sweet baby in my arms, resting up and recovering for a couple of weeks. I'm so looking forward to that part! :)
I will update again soon!
As usual I should be getting in bed instead of updating my blog, so I will TRY to be brief! ;)
Mandi, my favourite midwife, came round today. And Jackie (the head of community midwives) phoned me this morning to catch up on how everything is going - so nice! :) It's a couple of days early, but today was my due date antenatal appointment. I declined a sweep - don't want to mess with that unless I'm 41 weeks and having the threat of induction waved in my general direction. There's too much added risk with Group B Strep anyway, and thankfully Mandi was of the same mind about it.
Everything looks fine - my blood pressure was 116/68 and my urine was totally fine. Mandi could feel straight away that Elijah has grown when she felt him through my tummy. He's lying in the position he's always in - back along my left side, feet against my right side (LOA), and his head was 4/5 palpable still. He's in there, but still quite high. Benjamin was that high at least in early labour, and Mandi reminded me that he may not go down any further until some good contractions move him there during labour! She measured my bump as 37 weeks, but she's fine with that since I had a scan and it showed he is growing.
Mandi is working tomorrow (Tuesday), Thursday this week, and then not again until Monday. She's also doing Tuesday and Thursday next week. Gestationally for me those dates would be 39+6, 40+1 (Benjamin was born then), 40+5 (she's booked me in for my 41 week appointment that day if I haven't had the baby by then), 40+6 (which will be the day after a probable sweep, which has so far brought me a baby the next day the two other times I've had it done), and 41+1 (around Samuel and Matthew's gestational arrival). Mandi has delivered Samuel and Benjamin, and Heather and I are praying praying PRAYING that I will give birth on a day that she is working again! She only works three days a week (no nights), so it's not that likely, but then God answered these same prayers last time, even though she was barely working at all over the time I was due! :) I would LOVE to have her with me during labour and to deliver Elijah as well. I am not sure if I would otherwise get a midwife that I like and who would be as sensitive and understanding as Mandi, and definitely not one that I know so well, so I would reeeeally like it to be Mandi! Thursday this week isn't the best day for Heather because it's her daughter's 14th birthday. She and her daughter have agreed that she would come anyway if I went into labour that day, but it would just be nicer for her to be with her family rather than with me I think!
I am hoping (without a TON of confidence) not to be waiting until next week! 41 weeks pregnant is comparatively WAY less fun than 40 weeks pregnant, lol! I would rather give birth before that point this time! I have done so twice though - both starting with really obvious shows and labour right after. Arthur's was at 40+2 (though he didn't actually arrive until 2 days later), and Benjamin's the day after my due date. It occurred to me that Arthur and Benjamin are SO similar in personality (and a bunch of other things, including looks!), and Matthew and Samuel are my calmer, easy-going boys with a TON of similarities, who both kept me waiting until I'd had a sweep at 41 weeks! ;) I have no idea what Nathey would have done if my waters hadn't broken at 35 weeks. He's fairly easy going so maybe he would have waited longer, and I wonder if that's a reason why my assertive, more fretty children gave off their "please get me out of here" hormone which in turn triggered my body to begin labour (so clever how that works!) earlier than that laid-back pair who were happy staying put for as long as I'd let them! ;) With that in mind, Elijah seems to me to be a very laid-back baby (from what I can tell so far), and if my theory is right, wouldn't that make him the type to stay put until a sweep started things off at 41+ weeks?! I hope he'll come sooner though!!
The midwife asked if I had had any early signs yet. I have had a few little things here and there, but those could easily mean not-a-lot other than just the usual "gearing up" thing that can go on for about as long as a piece of string, if you know what I mean! Any day now.... or not! ;)
I have been very crampy today, low front and back. That's usual for me at 39 weeks, regardless of when the baby arrives, so I'm not putting much on that. I feel like I am very uncomfortably constipated alllll the time, which maybe I am to some degree, but I am suspicious that a bony little head pressed against my bowel is at least part of the reason for that feeling at this stage! I remember trying to go to the loo like 5 times during the morning on the day that Benjamin was born (after the show, but before contractions started). I just felt so backed-up and uncomfortable, but couldn't really do anything, and it was very distracting. I feel like that today, but again, it doesn't mean I'm ABOUT to go into labour, particularly.
I am also losing little bits of mucus plug today every time I go to the toilet. Sounds more exciting than it is - it's really just LITTLE bits, and that can be normal for ages before labour begins. If any of it was blood-stained, that would be a very different situation, but none of it is. I keep checking! :)
The other thing is that Elijah has been a bit quiet yesterday and today. Yesterday he was quite a bit less active than normal, although still moving the same number of "sessions" - just the odd kick here and there for them though, and I just got a feeling of him being the opposite of active in there, in general. This morning when I woke up, he wasn't wiggling about (not that he always is) and I suddenly got really nervous because although I knew he was moving before I went to sleep, I was nervous about the quietness in there. I got my doppler out at 6.45am and listened in. It took forever to get the wonky battery thingy working (it's a bit broken but still works eventually!) and in that time I got REALLY anxious about him, having felt his position which usually gets him wiggly, but he was totally not moving. Thankfully the thing started working and I heard his happy little heartbeat. He started to move a bit as well while I was listening, and it was encouraging to hear accelerations in his heart rate as he moved and stuff. I listened in for a good 5 minutes or so, and then put the doppler away and tried to get a bit more sleep (didn't succeed unfortunately!). But I was glad that he was okay. I spoke to Heather on the phone during the morning before the midwife came, about various things, but I mentioned his activity levels, and she said I could mention it to the midwife if I was concerned, but it sounded like he was moving plenty, just more "quietly" than before. In her experience that sounded like a pre-labour sign, and I remembered the same thing had happened with Benjamin. He was so quiet the day or two before he was born. I even wrote here that I went to bed on my due date and lay awake anxious about his quietness (though he was still moving, like Elijah is now, just not as vigorously or often), and said to God aloud, "Lord, I'm nervous about Benjamin's lack of movement..." or something like that, and INSTANTLY he began wiggling about really vigorously and kept it up for a while! It was such a relief! He was born the next day :)
I did tell Mandi about it, and she said that as long as he's having 10 sessions of movement per day and keeping to his norms in that way (he has had 8 sessions so far today, some quite wiggly, others just a few quieter movements - he usually has exactly 10 by the time I get in bed, so I think he's pretty much on track still), I do not need to worry about it, but if I'm not sure, or if it makes me anxious and I want reassurance, I can call them and have him checked at Day Assessment. So that's good to know. She also said exactly what Heather said, that in her experience he's probably gearing up for labour and birth pretty soon, if he's having a quiet couple of days - the calm before the storm, she described it as! ;)
So all those little signs together ARE rather exciting, but with my history of having little exciting signs here and there and then STILL waiting at 41 weeks, I don't want to let myself think about it too much and start wondering if it might be very soon. Because then if/when it doesn't happen for ages yet, I will become super-duperly frustrated and fed-up! ;) That part in itself is no fun, so I would rather stay as carefree about it as possible for as long as I can manage to!
Today is Monday and Neil is back to work after the weekend. Yesterday I had the craziest thing happen. It was like a food craving. I HAD to paint my toenails. I don't think I've ever felt that before, or at least not in recent pregnancies and not that I can remember anyway. But I HAD to paint my toenails, and what's more I had to paint them pink and sparkly - very girly! ;) But I don't have any nail polish!! I never really do that kind of thing so I don't have any. I did once have sparkly nail polish, and it might even be in the loft, but it has probably been nearly 10 years since I painted my toenails and even if I could find the stuff (which, trust me, is an impossibility in our horribly cluttered loft!) it would probably be all congealed or dried up by now. Anyway, this weird craving-type-thing was all-consuming! So strange for me! When I wrote about it at Facebook, quite a few people commented that they painted their toenails (or had the urge to) right before labour started, which I hadn't even considered until I saw all their comments, and I found it very interesting! Time will tell whether that's why I'm desperate to paint my toenails, I guess!
In the absence of nail polish, I shaved my legs and clipped my nails (not awfully easy when this pregnant, but I managed!), and moisturised my legs and feet. I never do this! I mean, obviously I cut my toenails, lol! But I shave my legs pretty rarely, unless it's summer (which it hasn't been at all yet, but that looks set to change this week, urrrgh - overly warm weather just in time for me to give birth, boo! I would much have preferred to be giving birth in the cool fresh rainy weather we've had for aaaages!), and NEVER moisturise. But even so, the urge to have girly sparkly toenails continued, and in the end I went on Amazon late last night and used some birthday money to order a set of various pink nail polishes, and a separate sparkly one. I put them on express delivery, haha! They've been dispatched today, and I'm absolutely LONGING for them to arrive tomorrow - that would be the soonest they could possibly arrive. The pink set might arrive first, because the feedback is great for fast delivery for that seller, but less so for the sparkly nail polish seller. If so, I will paint my toenails pink when the pink stuff arrives, and just add a sparkly layer over the top when it gets here! :) It's such a crazy feeling - I honestly feel like I CANNOT go into labour until I have pink sparkly toes. Seriously. I also need to bake a few things before I can start producing oxytocin, haha! Noteably (sp?!) chocolate refridgerator cake (made this morning!), double batch of flapjacks (less than a double batch is a pointless task in our household of flapjack-loving boys, and even that disappears in a day or two), and a batch of iced fairy cakes. I made lemon fairy cakes (these are basically cupcakes, in case anyone is wondering, but smaller and without a ton of buttercream on the top - just glace (water) icing instead) with the boys last week and then went in a flash, so I need to make more! Maybe plain instead of lemon this time, although the lemon was lovely! Anyway, I digress! And I'm supposed to be going to bed!!! Baking is usually a good pre-labour sign for me too, although I have been having bouts of that for months now, so who knows.
Well, I had better go to bed. I am still not sleeping great, but my best success at the moment is to get up and spend 5 minutes stretching out my various leg muscles - feels like it takes AGES in the dark bedroom, but it's worth it. I usually fall asleep within 30 minutes of doing that, whereas I might have already been awake for hours, so it's a big improvement. I am going to try it before I even get in bed tonight, as I'm really really really tired out and can't run the risk of a few hours of sleep after not being able to get to sleep for a while. I have had more energy today to do housework and such, than I have for a while. I have cleaned a bit in the bathroom today, and done various post-weekend catch-up chores in the kitchen, re. laundry and the floor, but my lower back aches for it, I think, tonight. I can focus (and WANT to focus) on housework really well, but I can't seem to focus on the boys much at all. I have little patience and their noise is unbearably distracting. I am finding it makes me feel fidgetty and irritable to sit with them and play and snuggle and stuff - which is sad! :( I do it anyway, but I am much more "sane" busying about the house doing nesty stuff. I guess it's hormonal and normal, but I don't like the feeling of finding my children's company irritating! I also can't for the LIFE of me get my head round simple stuff like meal preparation, or responding to "Mummy, I'm bored!" like I normally can. I just have fluff for brains, and the more I sit and squeeze them, the more ridiculously absent any useful thought is, and I actually start feeling panicky and tearful about it after a while. It sounds daft but I could. not. manage. to put dinner on the table tonight. I just couldn't think of anything, even though there's food in the cupboards and I could see it there. I just couldn't think what to make, or who would actually eat it, or anything. I tried sitting and concentrating on it, and pulling myself together for an HOUR, but was constantly interrupted by kids arguing, or having done a poo, or getting stuck and screaming, or "He took my toy!" or "He hit me on purpose!! Yes you did!! Yes you DID!!! YES YOU DIIIIIID!!!! (thwack)" I about wanted to scream, and I couldn't get anywhere on the food front!! I felt upset that Neil would be coming home AGAIN at a time when I should have the boys ready to go to bed, not running riot around the house, unfed and totally nowhere near ready for bed, at the end of a hard day's work! :S
So, Neil came home just as I was serving cereal and toast for dinner. *sigh* And the boys went to bed soooo late. I hope I can sort it out tomorrow. It's getting really hard to manage the days, even if I have energy and "know" what I need to do - I can't seem to actually DO it by the end of the day. By halfway through the day even if it's a GOOD day, I really feel quite desperate to have a break, to be able to get away upstairs and rest or focus on what every fibre of my being is wanting to do - the arrival of my baby and the psychological and practical preparations. I can't seem to be in the moment any longer with the usual daily stuff and the children. I wish someone could help me with the boys so I could take those apparently necessary breaks at this pre-labour stage of pregnancy. I have no choice so I DO it all the same, but I'm struggling a bit. That's a MAJOR reason for me, not to want to wait the whole of this week before giving birth (or worse, into next week!). I know that it gets more difficult day by day as 41 weeks arrives, and I am already finding it difficult. I think I just need to have a baby now. I am nervous about the scale of the event, when it happens! But I really just want to have it behind me now, the hormones and hugeness, and my sweet baby in my arms, resting up and recovering for a couple of weeks. I'm so looking forward to that part! :)
I will update again soon!
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