8DPO...

I'm still here!!! Moving into 9DPO (it's late, tsk!)!! I'm so glad my luteal phase is longer than last cycle, yay! :)

I have a lot to report for today, and it's late so I need to do it sort of bullet-point-y, otherwise I'll waffle and ramble and still be up just a few hours before I need to wake up and temp again, haha! ;)

My temperature went UP this morning!!!!! I was so excited to see it, I don't know WHY I am quite this excited, really, but I apparently am! It's my highest temp this cycle, and in a way it surprised me after yesterday's temp drop, but in all other ways it was not a surprise. I woke up just FEELING luteal-phase-ish still, overly warm and all that stuff. Subtle things that I'm pretty familiar with now. So it was 36.8 this morning, and I was so pleased because with a temp like that I certainly did not expect to see my period today. And it hasn't arrived! In fact, not any sign of it coming at all right now.

I am double excited really, because I have had bad cramps on and off (this morning I even considered taking painkillers once or twice, seriously) for 48 hours now with NO period following. Now, that has never ever happened to me before (ever) except when I have been pregnant. Ever.

I have to tell you, no matter whether my temp drops in the morning and my period does show - I know I sound like a broken record or something, but I absolutely completely feel like I am pregnant. It's not so much the queasiness that started late afternoon and hung around through the evening today, or the flatulence that's becoming rather ridiculous now (!!), typical of a pregnant luteal phase for me, or the other things that could easily be me mis-reading PMS signs. It's none of that. The convincing stuff is the stuff which, in my LONG history of charting and over-analyzing every tiny detail of my body's signs and symptoms (!), ONLY happens when conception and implantation has taken place (or started to, at least). Some things, for me, NEVER take place otherwise. And the cramping is one of them.

Today the cramps have changed over the course of the day, and I wanted to detail that here for my "records", for comparison really.

This morning right from waking I had pelvic discomfort across the whole area and through to my back, right across the small of my back. It was just "hurty/crampy" (from my FF chart notes that I jot down through the day if I get chance, so I don't forget anything later!). That kind of feeling has continued fairly continuously throughout the day. Sometimes the backache has felt so uncomfortable that I couldn't get comfy sitting on the sofa.

During the first part of the morning I started to be aware of a new feeling which went on to be pretty constant and bothersome for the rest of the morning and then on and off through the afternoon and evening. It felt like a sort of pulling/searing pain (well, "pain" is a bit strong, but cramp isn't really the right word, and it was more than discomfort) right across the whole area inside my hips and from the pit of my abdomen up to my bikini line. It was much more focused behind my pubic bone (maybe even lower, that's how it felt). At the same time, further out to just inside my hips (further up near my bikini line) I had a sensation very much like mild ligament pain (as in, the type of ligament pain I experience a bit later on during my pregnancies, just a miiiild version of it), a sort of stretching-ish feeling, but not quick flashes like real ligament pains - it was constant and very uncomfortable.

I have had sort of burny pressure sensations very low and central (once or twice today those turned into yucky hot vice-like cramps that radiated outwards to my hips low down, just for a minute each time maybe, but I was SO SURE my period had arrived both times and went running to the loo to sort it out!). The pressure feeling is strange with the pulling/stretching feeling further out! It's an odd combination to feel. I am so very familiar with this kind of feeling that I know pretty much for sure that it's because implantation is underway. Even so, I just have no idea if my luteal phase can support it, so it's a wait and see thing again, and I must not let myself get too excited about the possibility.

I have more CM than usual again today, but less than yesterday for sure. My crampy sensations are a little easier this evening but the backache is bothersome. I haven't had any time at all today from waking till now without some sort of cramping or pelvic discomfort, so something is definitely going on! I never have this before a period, even RIGHT before, not to this degree.

I'm not particularly aware of any breast discomfort today, but I still think they are bigger than they were.

I charted weirdly soft skin today!!!! :D I asked Neil to verify (he's my Quality Control Guy, haha! Very strict standards!) and he said yes, and then that he wasn't sure. I feel sure, and for him to even say yes to start with is enough for me, so I charted it! ;) That's a very strong pregnancy sign for me. I've never had that without being pregnant (as Megan noted!).

I feel too warm today. It's not warm (though a LOVELY sunny day today!) but I have had all the windows open today! So nice! :) I feel burny behind my skin, especially on my face (keep getting flushed) and in my eyes and can't seem to feel the cold at all. I have some new spots (hormonal) on my face today, just a couple. That's not usual for me at all before a period. Specifically I get a few on my neck (for some weird reason!) before a period, but never on my face. I do sometimes note spots on my face in pregnant luteal phases though, especially Nathan and Benjamin's pregnancies (and some chemical pregnancies).

Okay so if you have seen my chart today, you probably saw that I was a bit of a crazy woman and peed on a stick at only EIGHT days past ovulation, hahaha! ;) Yes, yes, I know, but they're expiring as I type this and sitting in the drawer calling my name!! With a high temp and reaching 8DPO when I wasn't sure if would, I just had to test! Of course it was negative! ;) I am sure I saw a shadowy line, but I couldn't possibly call it anything except negative. I had to really stand on my head and close one eye and spread my toes apart to see the "line", so I am very likely just seeing things, hehe! I have been back to it in various lights (!) over the day and still see the shadow, but it's just that, a shadowiness, not a line. I'm so silly! ;) I will test every day until either my temp drops or I get a positive test, I think. Just to use up the expiring tests, of course! Can't have them going to waste! ;)

That all said, now that I've jumped about here all excited, I will likely get my temp drop and period tomorrow! It's still entirely possible. If I do, I will have had an 8-day luteal phase - one day better than last cycle, but still short. I'm just so pleased it isn't sticking at 7 days or less. I confess I'm hopeful for a pregnancy that sticks, but I TRULY should not get myself so excited about the possibility! Whatever the outcome it's absolutely fine because God knows BEST about what is right for our family and when. I need to keep my mind focused on that instead of charts and test sticks and things! And go to bed now. It's so late, and I'm very tired again today.

I'll update my chart as early as I'm able to, and my blog at some point tomorrow too. Thanks for reading and being excited with me (those who are, that is! There are probably others rolling their eyes and clicking swiftly away to somewhere more sane, haha!)!